Reasons My Kintsugijin is Crying, or; The Weepy Marshmallow Brigade

Turns out a not insignificant percentage of the crying was hunger related, determined by the fact that I felt a lot better when I finished dinner

 

I binged today :(

 

This FUCKING company won'tlet me edit myFUCKING appli8cation even though it autocompleted INCORRECT INFORMATION and then acted like i had signed it eventhough i FUCKING HADN'T.

 

Song lyrics:
Break off a piece of your memory
Break off a piece, and share it with me
Break off a piece, and maybe I will see differently


Nebulous sadde feelings

Eta: and then sometimes u read a Good Omens fic and have to cry abt death

 

I sway wildly back and forth on whether I believe in an afterlife and whether one would be a good thing or not, but fictional universes which canonically don't have afterlives upset me badly because I feel the characters should at least get a reward for the bullshit we put them through.

 

im listening to the Mountain Goats album thr Life of the World to Come and there are 3 tracks in a row towards the end that are just Hello Its Crying Time

Dont listen to Matthew, Deuteronomy, and i mean Isaiah is probably fine for me personally but its still bad idea

The final track is fine even tho someone died in it

 

Oh God, Matthew is the one about going to see a loved one dying of cancer, isn't it? Because holy shit yeah.

 

I'm already preemptively crying about how hard I'm going to cry when I actually see the movie. Also, Tom Hanks is a perfect Mr Rodgers and I will take no further opinions (jk, I'd love to hear otherwise even though Tom is perfect for it imo):

 

I had that awful clogged-up feeling where I'm about to cry for no reason at all but it won't happen, so I'm reading about Rat Park to make it happen so it will go away.

 

Eugene Lee Yang's coming out video. It makes me fucking sob.

 

What a beautiful video. Holy crap. The way he choreographed the lifts is so lovely. There isn’t really a huge, well known tradition of how to do couples dance, not just any pas de deux but a couple, with dancers of the same gender in any remotely classical style without some amount of awkwardness. Not to even mention lifts. So that’s something I specifically look for. This was just wonderful. It flowed.

 

If anyone else wants to look it up, just be warned that there's references to mass shootings and homophobic assaults.

 

i don't know much about dance, but for me it was the emotive quality and the detail in the whole thing, things like how his outfits corresponded to the rainbow flag that you notice on maybe the second and third playthrough. I'm not a gay man, but as a nb bisexual person it managed to seek out and resonate with my own experiences is what really wrenched at me.

 

If it lets people understand something without having to know the technical details, I’d say that’s an artistic success of the highest caliber.

 

My coworker was talking about her younger brother and how he would have these rage fits and would be heavily depressed and so his doctors started him on some medication, it's had minor and easily handled side effects and it's really helpful.

I was happy for him and I teared up because she told me he went and told his mom that he doesn't have to pretend to be happy anymore because he's actually feeling happiness now. I'm just. Overly filled with joy hearing that.

 

two horseflies got into the apartment. i am very very very scared of horseflies

but one of the cats wanted to chase and play with them, and i was more scared for her, so now they (the flies) are both dead

it's been an hour and i am still crying and very frightened

 

That was very brave of you, protecting your cat like that! If I was in that same situation i'd've been paralyzed from fear. Zippy bugs that I can't keep tracking where they are scare me enough, not to mention the ouchy ones.

 

today I watched some videos of counter-protestors in Portland and nothing was really happening in the videos but there were SO MANY counter-protestors and they had all showed up and they were all ready to fight and I got very teary-eyed

I also cried in the car while listening to God Is A Woman by Rett Madison even tho it is mostly a victorious song

 

My caseworker reminded me that I have a voice and my own opinions even though some people treat me like im a child. Was trying not to bawl and he said I also am allowed to have emotions, and learn to have them and choose to act on them or not.

Basically a huge 'you deserve respect, too' talk. It was very simple stuff but. No one's ever? Told me that??? I cry