shitposting rave 2, electric boogaloo

Only if C3PO decided he actually wanted gentialia, though.

*sighs* Well, maybe not, since well, Darth Vader, but... how about we try pretending to live in a fantasy world in which Sith Lords wouldn't give robots dicks non-consensually?

Which is silly, I know, but... yeah... I don't wanna think about how much being a robot must suck in the Star Wars dimension.

 

no thank you. But you look like burned vader that made out with blown-up alderaan.

No, my robot is not C-3PO. My robot's name is PROXY

Spoiler: PROXY

 

Shut up, dude!

Deadpool's wonderful, and honestly, I'm so glad that he wants me. Even if he also wants everyone else with or without a pulse, and I'm nothing special to him... *sighs* Just another of his many flings, the many dudes he's hooked up with... He's still wonderful and I won't stand for you being an asshole to him.

He never was a dick to me about joining Bill, about that shit I did. It never really mattered to him. Which might be 'cause he's not in the Tango, but yeah... if he can keep off my ass about me doing that, surely you can lay off the shallow insults and shit.

 

I'll take that as a compliment.

Spoiler: a testicle with teeth

 

I was merely making a joke. I'm glad someone got it.

 

Hey now, every one of my flings is special to me. You just can't tie me down. Uh I mean you CAN but that's the fun kind, or the torture kind, not the 'monogamous relationship' type.
Can we shot someone in the foot again?
Good call, that would be less awkward.

 

*grins* I'm glad you think I'm special. That's all I need, really. I'm clearly not looking for monogamy, you know... Just... I wanna matter to people. Be more than a convenient hole or some easy dick for them. I mean, that's fun but... it's not enough.

 

Geez, babe, what are you thinking of me? I'm an asshole, but I'm a proper gentleman when it comes to romance!
... Sometimes.
Hey, we're trying.

 

*sighs* Sorry. Just... lots and lots of bad experiences. And just, well, being very used to having people think of me as a thing... It's not about you, really. It's about... fifty thousand years of shit.

 

*pats Norm's shoulder awkwardly*
There, there. You should eat a pound of ice cream with a chimichanga for a spoon, that's what I do when I forget I'm the hottest shit on planet earth.
And several other planets we've visited.
Yeah, gotta keep it real.

 

None of Fiddleford's robots are fuckable. And you'd have to be really weird to want to. They tend to be large and murderous. Fiddleford respected the Three Laws like I do the Prime Directive.

 

*smiles softly* I appreciate the sentiment, even if the exact dish doesn't really sound like my thing.

*laughs lightly* I mean, burritos and ice cream? Together? Seriously?

Well, you do you, that's what I always say. (Okay, it isn't what I always say but it's my philosophy, I guess.)

 

Does it ever feel weird knowing that your successor is a raccoon?

 

* maybe....
* they should make better robots! ^.^
* i mean who wouldn't make a robot that can murder people?
* but! they should! be able! to do more than that!!

 

I like her better than his first wife.

 

I can regrow arms! I practiced really hard with that! I can turn basically anything into an arm.

-She looks smug.-

I guess you could say I can lend you a hand.

 

Well, my robot used to try to murder me all the time. It was kind of his thing.

 

good one kid. @sans. Would be very proud of you.

 

*wipes a single tear from his eyesocket*
* so proud.

 

"That's so what we need, another punster. Because those are in such short supply around here."