shitposting rave 2, electric boogaloo

Yeah. I can sass him all I want, and all he can do is sass me back here. *smirks* And he's not even particularly good at it, so... *laughs*

Prepare to get wrecked, @the bill of wrongs!

 

And I have a problem with you, @Starkiller! And your SHIP! Must destroy SHIP!

Ships are bad and evil and abusive!

I am an Anti Shipper!!!!

uwu

 

*heart eyes*

I'd tell him to apply ice to that burn, but Wendy's not around.

 

Chroma...my father was a pilot, what you'd call a helmsman, but here's the thing: he was able to get out of the ship, walk around and have a life when the ship wasn't going anywhere.

My family's technology is probably very similar to the technology you're used to. And we're certainly not nice people. But our entire species uses this particular technology--not just my family--because we've made it non-coercive.

People who are good at psionics and good at mathematics and good at physics pilot Talassani ships voluntarily, and get paid very well to do it. And they're not maimed or mutilated. They have crystalline implants in their spines, arms and legs that allow them to go into suspended animation from the neck down and use the nerves that control their bodies normally to control the ships. When they're not doing that, though, they can do whatever they like with their bodies and their lives. My father (who for all his evil and insanity, does love me--enough to thank Ford for making me happy before warning us that he'd be forced to kill us if he ever met us again) does not have to stay in his ship when it isn't going anywhere. He can pilot the ship when it needs to be piloted, and the rest of the time he can dance, run, have sex, jump, and do anything else you can do with a body, though he sometimes complains that he doesn't understand how people who aren't pilots can stand our download speeds.

There's really literally no reason for the Empire to do what it does except that it just doesn't care about people. I was born into a death cult, and yet they didn't do that to their pilots.

Ford meant it when he said he'd kill Sunshine, me and you before he'd let the Condesce have us. Not that I think killing me would be done in a way he'd survive himself, but what she does is an abomination even to people who believe that killing people is merciful because life is pain and suffering.

 

*heart eyes*

Nobody gets to either of us without having to go through both of us. It's worked for twenty-five years and I expect it to continue working as long as we're both alive. And I don't expect either of us to survive the other long, but personally? I'm okay with following you wherever you go, and if you follow me I won't be able to get mad at you for that.

 

It took Weirdmageddon to get me to where you are on that score, but yes, the same, my love.

 

*gulps* Kill them, really? Like, it could actually get that bad?

'Cause, I mean, I'm sure that if Sunshine, you and/or Chroma get captured and put in a ship, you could still be rescued. And well, once you're rescued, even with the trauma, you'd still feel much better than you would if you were dead... Right?

 

My understanding, admittedly based upon what Sunshine told me in the dark after a very close scare, is that they are not recoverable. I'd revise my decision if this were proven to be false, but Lise doesn't want to be a brain and a spinal column floating in a jar in my lab. You might be able to regrow the rest of their bodies, but I can't.

 

*winces* Oh. Okay. I can see why they might prefer death if that's the alternative. Yeeeeeeeesh...

 

Yeah, and while I'm pretty sure you'd fix Sunshine if that happened without even being asked to...I can't make that assumption for anyone, and certainly not for anyone else.

 

Even if he got Riki and Static to hook me up to the network, got a PAN and gave me direct access to his mind, so we could share each other's thoughts and essentially fuse if we liked...it wouldn't be much of a life for either of us. Although if we had young children it might need to be considered, just so they'd have one of us to look after them physically.

Okay. Ford, that thing we were talking about...it is not going to happen until after the Condesce has been dealt with.

 

After the Condesce has been dealt with I won't have any objections, provided it doesn't take another 20 years. I'm doing fine for 65, but I don't want my kid to be 7 ... when I'm 92. Just in case.

 

*sighs* Yeah, true. But... in this case, you can at least ask me, yeah?

That would suck, yeah. I guess I never really considered the possibility of life getting bad enough to be worth ending 'cause, well, I can't die. Even if I ever wanted to. So I just learned to live with sucky things happening to me, to endure and tough it out, and try my best to make my life better.

 

*is INCREDIBLY aMUS3D*

 

You wouldn't mind my asking? In the case of Sunshine only, or Lise and Chroma, too? I just want to be sure.

And believe it or not...I almost understand that. I mean...Weirdmageddon would never have happened if I'd destroyed the portal and then committed suicide. I didn't even know Valiska existed then.

But I couldn't do that to Fidds, even though by then he hated me. Or to Stanley.

 

*banish banish banish* It may only be temporary because this is a non-dimensional space but...shoo!

 

Don't look at me like that! Whoever's choppin' onions in here needs to stop.

 

(( i'm gonna interrupt to ask a question

if the shitposting is already this awful wonderful now

how catastrophic is it going to get on april fools, the holiday equivalent of a shitpost ))

 

*nods* With all of them. This, I think, is the kind of situation in which the way being asked for wishes makes me feel takes lower priority than, well, the wishes themselves. After all, apart from the taking-your-brain-out-of-your-body stuff, I think I sorta understand what being a helmsman is like. And I wouldn't want any of you to have to choose between being one and being dead. *sighs*

 

Thank you. I mean it with every fibre of my being.

(And Stanley, I don't know who is chopping onions in here, but somebody certainly is. Would you, Lise, and Norm object to a group hug in the face of all this onion chopping?)