shitposting rave 2, electric boogaloo

The most embarrassing thing about being a cursebreaker as a teenage girl (which is what most of us are, for a number of reasons) is the number of clients who come to you because their involvement with the demonic was inspired by a desire to increase the size and/or performance of their penises.

And since the implementation of universal medical care and basic income on Pennarion, that problem has only become worse, not better.

 

I was about to say that was exactly what they did, but... now I think about it, it actually wasn't. *sighs* It was more like, "I wish I never met you." Or "I wish the world was back to normal."

So being a cursebreaker is a lot like being a genie?

 

Peace, no. Peace changes nothing. But still no reason to drag other crews, other star systems, other species into your fight.

"Usual" very vague. Most mechanoid species live longer than many organics, though.

...to be fair, 4 million years is little less than a third of (surviving) recorded Cybertronian history.

 

It's more like...demons are asked to grant wishes a lot, and they get asked to grant the same kinds of wishes that genies get asked to grant.

Cursebreakers are the people who have to clean up the mess afterwards.

 

THE FIRST ONE IS TERRIBLE! IT'S RUDE TO YOU... AND, WHAT'S TO STOP THEM FROM MEETING YOU AGAIN???

THE SECOND ONE... WHAT'S NORMAL?

NO, MINE IS DEFINITELY BETTER! LIKE A REDO BUTTON. IT GIVES THEM THE CHANCE TO MAKE BETTER WISHES... AND TO SPEND MORE TIME WITH YOU!

WEREN'T YOU TRAPPED IN THE LAMP, EXCEPT WHEN PEOPLE HAD WISHES TO MAKE?

 

Frustratingly stubborn. Been in my life since I was a child. Been in hers since she was a child too. Sews and likes poetry. Gave me the book of poetry that I gave to her. Stable time loop thing. Stupidly concerned about women's rights. Insane enough to raise a grub like a lusus. Tried her damnedest to kill me when I threatened him as a joke. Breaks ribs nicely. Not afraid to insult me. Doesn't let me walk all over her. Full of sass too. Gave me a name. Thinks it's important.

Basically that Porrim kid if she grew the fuck up. Is her actually. Other universe though.

 

I didn't think so but I was puzzled by your insinuation that you actually could draw faces from across the street. I was under the impression you'd need to be able to aim to do that.

And my understanding is that it's a lot easier to aim if...well.

 

I never met her, but I like her already. She sounds like the kind of person I'd love to know.

 

PSSSSH. THINK MORE LIKE MACGYVER! I COULD GET A HOSE.

...ARE THERE RULES AGAINST HOSES?

 

Oh. Right. That does make more sense.

Just... I really hope, if I decide to do this, that my clients won't end up reminding me of my masters.

*grins* Yep, yours is better. Much much better.

*sighs* Though, honestly, I never really thought that my masters wouldn't be rude to me. Or that they'd wanna spend more time with me. That I'd be anything more than a convenient little way for them to get all they ever wanted to them.

And yeah, yeah, I was. And it sucked. I'm so glad not to be in there anymore.

*laughs* Probably, yeah.

 

She's awful so she'd probably like you too.

 

...Wait. Do humans excrete waste from their genitals? Why?

(Alright, acknowledged that biology does not always make sense, but. Have not felt that particular brand of otherness for several centuries.)

 

I think a lot of humans would also like to know the answer to that question. It's certainly not evidence of intelligent design.

 

The rules of the game are that you have to use original equipment. I never said it wasn't a sexist game.

 

Some of them will. The kind of person who summons a demon believing that it has to do their will and then asks it to increase the size of their genitalia or make people fall in love with them will definitely remind you of some of your masters. Some people don't take those cases, but my mother and I always believed that even bad people don't deserve to be tricked by demons, given that demons are predators whose sole purpose for interacting with mortals is to destroy them in every way.

But not all of them will be like that. Some of them will be people like Ford or Jame or Sunshine or Kelly. I think of helping the bad ones as practise for making sure I can actually fix the good ones, because the good ones always have much more ...interesting... problems.

 

I hate you for making me think about her.

 

*frowns* Yeah. I might wanna refuse those cases. I mean, it's not that I think they deserve it or anything, 'cause they don't. I know they don't.

But... I reckon it'd hurt for me, trying to help people like that. Even if they were paying me. *sighs* Maybe I'm not cut out for this after all.

 

Valiska's rules not Norm's rules. Different people will have different boundaries. Not bad thing.

 

Good.

Maybe when I get all my memories of the lost years back, they'll be much more entertaining than they would have been if I hadn't met you.

 

Uh, yeah... I guess. Still, the way she talked about it, I can't help but feel bad.