shitposting rave 3: Dawn of the third rave

I don't like people very much. Or society. So I went and do my own thing and hunt and take care of myself.

 

Oh, that's a lie. Mom and the pod help, of course! But by the same logic, I help take care of them, so it evens out.

 

Mistakes are entirely too excusable for diplomatic parties. This is a space without consequences, so feel free to make as many as you like-- they won't carry over to the waking world.

Besides, better you make a mistake regarding reference to my position-- a mistake, I might add, that fully comes from an attempt to properly orient the respective ranks of our myriad Very Important Persons-- than anyone else.

I imagine shoving smaller organics inside of your various orifices would be considered fairly risque and tasteless too, but I can see where you might have the cultural clash there. I doubt most mechanoid races are designed for the frankly obscene number of ways to interface that we are either.

[He hums a single note and makes a vague gesture.]

Sparkmerging can be a deeply moving and enjoyable experience, but even between consenting partners it could be quite traumatizing as well. Some mechs are better at controlling the merge than others. I have a rather guarded, shall we say, personality, so I'm fairly good at managing, but even so I'd rather not indulge in the practice. Nothing like a sudden and baffling array of war flashbacks to ruin the mood.

 

You are too kind to reassure me like this Sir, but as it is my goal to be the! Very best! Assistant! Ever! I fear such a mistake is indeed not one that cna be brushed aside easily!

 

If you don't make mistakes, how can you improve? Being the best need not mean being infallible-- better to aim for a constant improvement, learning and applying your knowledge and training in a real-time setting for best results.

 

!!!!!!
That's right sir! Gosh you are incredibly smart and wise! Thank you for the advise sir!
[Focal is star-eyeing at Burlesque again. Hope u like having a baby admire u, Burlesque-senpai.]

 

yeah ok im in telepathic communion with whatever-the-tit-you-all-are then and not having a bizarrely lucid fever dream that makes sense oh wise and or knowing giant robot

i hope i still have NSAIDs lying around somewhere

and i like you random citizen

 

Ford considers this. "Yes, I can see how that might work. Also...the thing you mentioned? People have been known to do that, but...it's not considered socially acceptable. For one thing, any smaller organic that will fit inside an adult organic's orifices is quite unlikely to be sapient and capable of giving consent, and for another thing, I'd presume it might result in death for the smaller organic and serious injury for the larger one, given that smaller organics which cannot consent are still generally equipped with teeth and claws, which, while tiny, are absolutely capable of inflicting serious damage on, ah...sensitive tissues." He bites his lip. "I would imagine, however, with consenting sapients on all sides, and of course safety concerns attended to, it might be fine."

Spoiler: tw: demonic weirdness

Ford is not going to think about Pyronica swallowing Hectorgon whole--and Hectorgon emerging from her physical corpse, alive and none the worse for wear--on the Fear-Amid. Nor the way Bill's giant eye turns into a giant mouth...no. NOT thinking about it. He shudders, hoping the horrific mental image that flashed across his forebrain is his overactive imagination and not a memory of some sort. He knows he can't remember anything much about Dimension 2 or the hellmouth into which it emptied itself, but... Not thinking about things can be difficult.

 

[She shrugs.] Why not both? First descriptor was dreamspace for a reason. We just... share the dream, somehow. (Or daydream, as the case may be.) Don't know how, ask one of the physicists. ...maybe not Stanford, he... doesn't look like he's up to explaining dimensional shenanigans right now.

=]

 

[He would pat Focal on the head if that wasn't weird. Ah, baby diplomats. So cute, so innocent, so... much taller than him, actually.]
You're welcome. Feel free to ask me about anything you might have questions or issues with, I've been playing this game for a long while. My rules may not always be your rules, but they'll provide you with an alternate model of behavior that you can apply to your decision making.

Mm, well. I was mostly thinking about transporting the myriad alien races around in my alt-mode, but I'd quite forgotten that eating things and the like is a thing for organics. I see your point though. You don't have quite the same issue of scale regarding your species, do you?

[He's going to ignore those tells of distress. Because nope, not bothering with that today.]

 

yeah this is me believing you look how credulous i am i am the very definition of credulousness/credulocity/whatever the point is i super duper take your every word as the gospel truth

stanford huh whod that be

[She looks for the person who looks least up for explaining things. Aha, there he is! Time to nonchalantly wander over yonder.]

hey old dude you look upset

 

Ford is visibly relieved by the question, which derails his train of thought momentarily. "No," he says, "nor even related species, really. My wife and I are not the same species." He smiles. "I don't think organic beings can get as large as Transformers do. The materials of which we're made wouldn't be able to handle the stress of the mass involved."

"Oh, no, I'd welcome the distraction." Ford smiles.

"You'd be upset too, if people were calling you 'old dude'. My name is Stanford Pines. Most people just call me Ford."

 

called it! im not old or a man but why be upset about the truth pine tree seems like youre both

[She grins. It isn't very sweet, but adults are bad news. Even the imaginary ones.]

dunno why id bother talking to you if youre just a dreamy construct so you better prove youre not quick or at least make yourself entertaining

 

"Pine Tree?" Ford stares at her for a moment before he realises that she can't possibly have known that's what Bill calls Dipper, and nobody's ever called him before. "I'm a dreamer, same as you."

 

Genies have something kinda similar to sparkmerging, that we do with our tails. It doesn't meld minds or anything, but other than that, it's pretty close, I think.

 

"1 guess you couldn't do that w1th someone who hasn't got a ta1l...."

 

*sighs* Yeah. Since, well, the tails basically wrap together and become less solid and merge.

 

Why not wish Sunshine has a tail for a day if you wanted to do that?

I guess. I mean. Norm is Norm.

 

ethereal hentai nice so when do you merge your ponytail with the magic fuck tree

[She notices the hesitation.]

tell me someone else has thought of that nickname i cant have been the only one i will lose my last shreds of faith in a just universe if no one else has ever called you pine tree

i coulda made some ford-fjord-butte connection but i said to myself you know what thats too abstract so i went with the easy one

but nah here i am

disappointed

ive never been to the isle of innisfree or even heard any folks say that im a dreamer before now

 

yooooo soul sisters with la llorona the girl