shitposting rave 3: Dawn of the third rave

You know what's also a funny joke?
Me stuffing a literal bomb down your throat.
It's an audience favorite.

 

literally all i did was make fun of your name sweet jesus mary and joseph i dont know enough about your movement to actually make fun of it

wait lemme guess now youre gonna accuse me of WANTING to make fun of your political movement... even though thats not what i said

i mean im just extrapolating based on the rest of this failed abortion of a discussion that youre in the habit of soapboxing about things the person youre talking to never said not to mention how you took one interaction with me and started painting me into your weird "all organics are literally double mchilter burgers" corner and turning up your nose about all these people youre forced to talk to like where the FUCK did you get your diplomacy degree because youre clearly unqualified to represent anyone if you cant manage to muddle through one argument without getting all anti-organic about it no matter how obnoxious the person might be

 

[Venture ruffles his wings, uncomfortable, but speaks up--]

Uh. Captain. Sorry for speaking freely but considering this is leisurespace and it doesn't really matter if I'm an insubordinate fragstick here-- generalizing really isn't gonna help here? Like I realize you're a 'Con and you've probably got Towards Peace engraved on your optic shielding and some of that is uuuusually the organic-hating deal but the tiny aggro squishy poking fun isn't exactly on the same level as GalCom trying to blast every vaguely-Cybertronian-looking ship outta their airspace ya dig? Pretty sure her world doesn't even have mechanoids to oppress.

 

wouldnt you say it's a real "blast", inepticon?
*the clown is overcome with giggles*

 

Uh. [His wings flatten against his back, and he looks around the Rave worriedly.]

Anyone know if Captain Nichrome's got an amica or something? Anything?

 

so. making fun of someones name is literal oppression but death threats are hilarious. if it vwasnt a crime punishable by death, id play devwils advwocate and say youre being a bit of a hypocrite by your owvn shitty standards.

 

1) Why did you try if you can't even put in the effort to do it properly. Especially if you didn't want to. What was your motivation here. I don't understand it.
2) Your reference to a "diplomacy degree" reveals a startling fixation upon formalized education I think you should examine.
3) That being said I'm off duty. And even if I wasn't, I'm representing the faction that did the whole multiple organic genocides thing. Arguing with organics at all is a step up from literally anyone else they could have sent. Hashtag I'm Trying.

 

You assume I'm not aware that I am a hypocrite.

 

alright, i cant argue vwith that. carry on.

 

Well, since I killed them both, and they went down easily, people thought it was staged and that I caused a team-up with them.

Panda ears? Really? Now you make him sound so fluffy.

 

Trust me, he's the opposite of fluffy. Just imagine the most stereotypical loud, foul-mouthed Australian man you can. Yeah...

 

...Cap. Have you never heard of the time-honored space hobo tradition of "this foreign word sounds like something stupid in my native language I'm gonna make a joke out of it"? Not the nicest thing to do but it's not like she's smashing protoforms.

Okay yeah that makes sense people are complete afts sometimes. Tough luck bro.

 

C'mon, let me bully the organic sparkling. I'm having fun.

 

[For once, his speech patterns slow and he actually sounds something like someone with training.] ...Is that an order, Captain?

 

Have you guys ever heard of Fucking, Austria?

 

-he looks around, focusing especially on @Nichrome of Iacon -
You know what? I think this situation is above my pay grade, and I'm both a retired LTCOL and possibly the highest-paid person on our ship, what with the medical bonuses.

I'm going to go... have a drink. Many drinks. And maybe my boyfriend, if he's willing. Maybe @Cloudcrusher of Kalis, too. I wish Captain Nichrome could come, but unfortunately I don't share my recreational time with bots who antagonize others for fun.

 

... Venture. We're both off the clock right now. For all I care you could beat me upside the helm for being a glitch if it actually bothers you How I behave.

Yes, it's supposed to have a beautiful sign at the entrance to the town that gets stolen quite regularly.

 

*fully aware that this is themost immature thing she could possibly say*
She started it!

 

Don't tempt me cap. [His wings ease down a little, though, and he offers something resembling a smile.]