shitposting rave 3: Dawn of the third rave

"Tea is nice, I would love some. I don't get much out of it nutritionally or chemically, but the warmth is welcome for a cold-blooded creature such as I."

 

Mhmm.

-pours her a cup CAREFULLY and sets it beside her CAREFULLY. a good host needs a good girl to serve tea or that girl gets beat-

You're one of the walking corpses right?

 

*snickering*
Wait a tick, kitty, we'll coordinate it so she gets all'a 'em, one mug at a time.

 

Anhelia takes the cup in her pale hands, cupping them around it. "Ah, warmth! Yes, I am. Though most of the original material is gone now. I died over 20 years ago. I spent about ten of that in hibernation, though, at the bottom of the sea. I'm glad I wasn't conscious for that part."

She takes a slow sip of the extremely hot tea, savoring the heat of it in her mouth for a moment before swallowing and feeling that flow of warmth down into her.

 

-grins, but also just happens to whack Hurdle in the head with her tail for that "kitty"-
"Perfect! Gotta make sure th´Capt´n know whatta good "mom" she is."

 

What's a mohm, again?

 

Th´female half of a human matin´pair. They help raise th´sparklings.

 

The 'female' half? Are you trying to tell me humans only mate in male-female pairs?

 

"But humans sometimes use the word for someone who acts like a mother," Anhelia points out. "A captain who makes sure their crew is as comfortable and happy as they can, for instance."

 

Why is that only for the female half?

 

"Because the term is gendered. Humans care about that a lot, more than they probably should in my view! The male partner is the father, or informally a 'Dad'."

 

Well I´m told only male an´ female pairs c´n produce sparklings though there seem ta be some recent changes ta that.

Naw, tha´s just cause th´Capt´ns a femme. Ta´match.

 

And what is the Dahd 'supposed' to do?

 

Been locked in a closet for a few sweeps. Not fun. Lucky you were out for it.

Don't even remember what I was in for. Suicide attempt? Maybe.

 

's far 's I can tell, play w' the kids. Read th'newspaper a lot. Also take the sparklings huntin' n fishin'. Teach 'em life skills. Ideally that is. Sometimes they ain't 'round much because a their jobs.

*he hardly seemed to register the swat against his helm.*

 

you mean refuse to support your passions and pick favorites of their own children?

 

Teach life skills such as riding horses to death or screeching at thin air in my experience.

 

Dads play chess and strangle you when you glare at the guests.

 

I think I smell a hint a' bitterness on the topic.
Y'all need some better dads.

 

To be fair he is dead now and I'm aware he's an atypical example. There are reasons he was exiled to the Haunted Lands. We've a tendency to go a bit mad, we Knorths.