shitposting rave 3: Dawn of the third rave

Valiska studies the spiky nurse. "Really? I'm a cat, too."

 

"She absolutely can," Valiska says, grinning. "And also dance."

"Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally?" Valiska shows off her carnivorous dentition. "They're much smaller than yours, but my entire species has them."

 

Sawbones squints a cat smile at her. "Well in this here dreamspace I can tell ya that I´m a cybertronian alt-self a lil Mina over there." -gestures at @Cosmina Kastellan- "I´m a beastformer what turns inta a humanoid mech. I consider th´feline my rootmode."

 

"I know Mina!" Valiska says. "She visited with us for a day or two during the fallout from the Weirdmageddon event. But...she didn't smell like a cat. Mina, are you a cat?"

 

but a human is off-limits, right?

 

"Relax. I was completely flabbergasted when Lise told me she was in love with me and kissed me. Then I asked her to marry me." Ford grins. "Of course, we'd known each other a few months, but that was the first hint of courtship, even though I was in love with her probably before she ever even spoke to me. Sev...we knew him a few weeks, almost a month."

 

"No, hy iz a jägermonster. But pipple tells me hy iz kinda like a ket in sum veys. Und she," -nods to Sawbones- "iz sumtink called a Dee-sep-shun."

 

"She is actually a cat robot," Valiska explains, rolling her eyes, "and I am actually biologically a feline. I understand that you have species dysphoria, but the problem is that you are an asshole about it."

 

vwhy do you keep calling it 'species dysphoria'. vwhat the hell is species dysphoria.

 

"That explains a lot. When we fought that one time, it was very cat-like. And I always did like you except for in the heat of that particular moment, when I imagine you didn't much care for me either." Valiska smiles. "I am very defensive of my pride, I must admit. And she's a Decepticon? but also a beastformer."

 

"Decepticon. It´s an affiliation like Jägermonster. But unlike Mina, my bein a cat is inborn." -turns into a a cat to demonstrate. The bodytype is similar to a serval or caracal, excepting the oversized scorpiontail, but the colouring is siamese cat like.-

"I never sed dat? Ya can call yerself a human if ya wanna fer all I care. Or a snake. No paint offa my platin"

 

"Because that's what it is." Ford sighs. "You hate being a troll. You feel like you're really a human. Or do you? Do you ever want to change your body?"

 

uh, no. vwhy vwould i evwer vwant to change THIS? dont fix vwhat aint broke.

 

Ford nods. "So...what do you mean, when you say you are really a human?"

 

"Oooh! You look like Jorin and Maya!" Valiska is pleased. "You are very pretty!"

((Jorin and Maya are servals.))

 

"Yaz. Und I don´t take orders vell from outside mine peck." -smiles- "Vas kinda doomed. Beastformers iz like klenk vot turn inta animal kinda shapes. They iz often Dee-cep-konz on accounta not kettink der best treatmen before dere beeg var."

 

look, i dont think youd understand. its pretty damn complex and personal and i dont feel like breaking it dowvn into bite-size chunks for your simple mind.

 

"Thank ya. And yeah, We weren´t much over th´Disposables, what organics would consider slaves. So when this mech comes along posimin´ya a world where everyone is equal, ya tend ta follow him. Acours,e then turns out he was a lyin spawn offa scrapheap but dats another story."

 

"My species has never practised slavery," Valiska says, "and I'm really glad that you're no longer having to deal with that shit."

 

"My simple mind," Ford repeats after him, wide-eyed. And then bursts out laughing so hard his entire face turns red. "How many doctorates do you have? What about patents? Ever written any books?" He shakes his head, still laughing. "Kid, you can set all the boundaries you want about your personal business, but don't you ever call me stupid. At least when I made my biggest contractual mistake I had reason to believe I was dealing with a higher intelligence. You just did it to piss me off!"