shitposting rave 3: Dawn of the third rave

do you think i care.

 

"I know Samira," Ford says with a wicked little grin.

 

...

Well, I mean. Uh. Yes and no+? As in yes and no+ I'm yo+ur ancesto+r. Yes, in that I preceded yo+u and am crucial to+ why yo+u exist in the first place but, no+, in that I'm no+t genetically yo+ur predecesso+r. I'm genetically yo+u. Just...fro+m a different universe? A different timeline? Bo+th, I guess. Wo+w this wo+uld be a lo+t easier if yo+u knew what the Scratch is. Um. Urgh.

He's a go+o+d man. Yo+ur great-uncle human dad? I am really no+t sure ho+w yo+ur thing all wo+rks o+ut. Human relatio+nships sure are co+nfusing! Anyway. Go+o+d man. Handso+me to+ bo+o+t.

...if that grin is because yo+u managed what I fear yo+u have then. Wo+w.

 

[The Gabberwock noddles at Valiska, continuing to stand refensestratively in the space betwixt the teal grub and Dualscar]

 

"Do you think I care that you don't give a hot greased damn about how to be a decent person?" The wind starts to blow around Paz. "Don't hurt the baby."

 

...pardo+n?

With that lo+o+k I'm afraid to+ kno+w ho+w yo+u kno+w her. It's...surprising to+ see so+meo+ne else calling her that, tho+ugh? No+t even my so+n do+es. Granted, that might be because she threatened him when he tried but the po+int remains. It's her name, but I gave it to+ her so+ it's a bit o+dd seeing it used.

 

Valiska looks down at the teal grub, cooing softly before she remembers the clicking noises Chroma makes to soothe herself and switches to those. "Awwww. Aren't you just the cutest little thing?"

 

*The grub demands lususly tactilicomfortics.*

*Lususly tactilicomfortics, not weird aliens. It stops screaming long enough to try and take a chunk out of Valiska.*

 

alright. you can choose. either ill retroactivwely nevwer havwe orphaned a single troll, or the trollian race can not be vwiped out by a starvwing eldritch beast.

 

"Thanks, Porrim."

Ford chuckles. "Apparently I'm very hateable. She's been telling me I'd never figure out her name, because I used to think her name was Damara, the same way that your name is also Porrim, and she told me I was wrong. I was going to figure it out one way or another, but it's so obvious who you're talking about..." He laughs again. "Do me a favour. Don't tell her I overheard you using it."

 

Valiska jumps out of the way and laughs. "You're feisty!" she says. "I understand now why my troll daughters are so surprised at the vulnerability of little kits, although when kits get mobile they can be pretty dangerous, too!"

 

Paz rolls her eyes. "I'm not interested in being distracted by your little timey-wimey bullshit games," she says. "I just want you to act like a decent person around the people I care about. I don't want to change troll history because I don't want my friends to not exist, I just want you to stop fucking up all over the place from now on, you bag of dicks."

 

She is rather...distinctive, yes. Yo+u always kno+w when she's appeared because the cho+co+late is go+ne, multiple co+rpses have been made, and she's punched yo+u because she's still co+nvinced that's ho+w flushed flirting wo+rks.

As fo+r keeping that little detail secret, I can certainly manage that. Go+d kno+ws she'll get frustrated no+t kno+wing where yo+u learned it. No+ po+int in ruining ano+ther's pitch fun!

 

I'm yo+u but yo+unger and also+ fro+m a different universe? I'm no+t sure ho+w to+ describe this o+therwise. Go+d.

 

I beg to differ. It was almost too easy.

 

[The Gabberwock's scuttal coils around the teal grub. Of a manner most tummurt and gentle does the tail coil, with numerous tiny plaps being applied to calm the grub. Toward the threat, frowling noises are made, toward the grub, the Gabberwock knicker-wicks woopingly.]

 

I HEARD A GRUB!

 

Ford grins at her. "Thanks!"

 

vwhy do you care about a bitey little teal sack of vworthlessness youvwe nevwer met before.

 

...because every life matters...