shitposting rave 3: Dawn of the third rave

Man, why are all of you in places made of assholes? I used to think New Haven was kind of a shithole, but now I'm beginning to see just how wrong I was. It's fucking idyllic comparatively.

 

We get animals.

 

"Yes, he is my dear twin brother. He wasn't aware until recently."
Simon grimaces lightly.

"I spent most of my career hunting Samael down. It was not particularly enjoyable as such. And in the process I met my dear lady wife and got to know her sweet lady friends, as well as got to be more familiar with my brother. So we decided that rather than implicate all the people I have come to care about quite dearly, we would, ah, rid ourselves from Simon Schuyler. Not the first time I faked the death of an alias for clean up, you see."
He took another sip, seeming impossibly calm and casual about this.

 

Dude that fucking sucks. I uh. Hope you get to see them again, though hopefully not with them dead because that would also suck.

 

... I'm sorry?

 

We get animals to raise us~.
But they aren't very smart normally~.
So after a while it's more like we have to take care of them~.
Some of them are great but some are sorta parasitic to their kids~.
Not literally, but there are these huge cerulean spiders that eat juvenile trolls so their kids need to find food for them~.
My mom is pretty good, I guess~.

 

...like, your frame parts or your spark or what? "Building block" is pretty vague and anyway I don't think sparks have enough edges to be blocks and not everyone's made'a squares??? What's a "genetic makeup"? Or, I guess, what's "genetic" mean?

...I mean Julian didn't agree to play tutor today, I can go ask Sil or something, don't gotta answer if it's a bother, I don't... really know enough science stuff for a proper exchange anyway??

 

7w3lv3 c45735, 70 83 3x4c7, 7h0ugh 0n3'5 833n 3x73rm1n473d. 7h3 h1gh3r up 7h3 5p3c7rum, 7h3 c0ld3r 7h3 8l00d, 7h3 57r0ng3r 4nd m0r3 l0ng-l1v3d 7h3 7r0ll, 4nd 7h3 gr3473r 50c14l 574nd1ng, w34l7h, 4nd m081l17y y0u p055355. 7h3 h0773r y0u run, 7h3 m0r3 l1k3ly y0u 4r3 70 h4v3 7h3 481l17135 w3 d15cu553d. 4nd 17'5...17'5 w0rk3d w3ll f0r 7h3 rul1ng cl455.

481l17135 l1k3 m1n3 4r3 f41rly c0mm0n, 8u7 n07 70 7h3 m4gn17ud3 7h47 1 p055355. 1 w45 4lr34dy pr377y h07 5h17 47 7w3lv3 5w33p5, 8u7 p51 gr0w5 w17h 4g3, 4nd 1'v3 533n 4 f41r f3w m1ll3nn14 7hr0ugh 8y n0w. 4nd 1f 1 w45 70 g37 51ck?? w3ll, 1 5upp053 my c4p741n w0uld 53nd f0r 7h3 m3d1cull3r5, 1f 5h3 d1dn'7 f1x m3 up w17h h3r 0wn 481l17135. 4nd 1- 1 7h1nk y0u'r3 m4k1ng 7h3 455ump710n 7h47 1 g37 71m3 0ff, wh1ch 1 d0n'7. 5h3 l375 m3 5l33p 3v3ry c0upl3 c3n7ur135 -pr377y 5ur3 7h47 7h47'5 wh47'5 h4pp3n1ng n0w- 8u7 1'm gr4f73d 1n70 7h3 5h1p, 1n 4 c0lumn 0f 810w1r3.

-Mituna concentrates, bringing up a security camera still of his helmsblock. He's hanging, suspended by the arms, from the enormous, vaguely eldritch column of biowire dominating the center of the room. His head's down, hair messy and just a touch too long. It'd be falling into his eyes if not for the goggles covering them, colored the same vibrant tyrian as the helmscolumn.-

l1k3 7h15, 533??

 

Organics don't usually have physical sparks, sweetling. And if you're interested I can certainly attempt to explain genetics, at least as applied to other species...

To clear up a bit of confusion-- as far as we're currently able to tell, our species does not have biological heredity, unless something extraordinarily odd happens within the planet itself to spawn... hm, what could be called a larval or natal stage. There's certainly something that happens-- CNA, our basest coding, has physical effects on any number of things-- but as for how that might be passed from one mech to another, let alone combined or duplicated without external meddling? It's not something I'm aware of.

(...in my main timeline. I've been informed here that several other transformer societies in... the relative future, shall we say, have certain parts reactivated and become capable of recombining their genetic code to produce young.)

 

its just a simple fact of life that evwery place youll evwer livwe in is going to be filled vwith assholes. vweakminded, delusional assholes vwhod believwe a chicken could sing if someone vwilling to take charge told them it could. just the simple facts of life.

 

You do seem to be here in multitudes~.

 

That's... yes, that is how it goes, usually.

-He's finally stopped looking so excitable, switching instead to a look of intense focus.-

Now that's- that's you, and you're... my God.

-He's silent for a long while and begins pacing. He gestures to the image and looks at Mituna. He is increasingly furious, not to mention nauseated. The words coming out of his mouth sound forced.-

Millenia, you say... and I can't imagine that's voluntary. If your abilities are common among your people, exactly how many of you are being held like this?

 

I'm a psionic too, you know~.
Just not anywhere near helmsclass~.

 

are you suggesting that id somehowv manipulate the lesser vwersions of myself into doing my bidding? oh, MAN, youre a riot. real funny cat.

*He WOULD make a motion to initiate a shoulder massage, but for some reason his arm seems suddenly pinned to his side. Narcissus struggles to move it for a few seconds before giving up.*

(stay out of things that arent your business, kid.)

 

*looks at @Julian Bashir*

*gets star/heart eyes*

 

h3y, 1'm n07 7h47 84d 70 l00k 47.

-He winces apologetically.-

17'5 n07...p4r71cul4rly v0lun74ry 0n my p4r7, n0. 1 g07 pu7 1n 45 4 pun15hm3n7 f0r, 4h, 1'm g01ng 70 83 n1c3 4nd c4ll 7h3m my r4d1c4l p0l171c4l v13w5. 8u7 7h3 pr0p4g4nd4'5 g00d, 50m3 p30pl3 c0m3 w1ll1ng, 50 l0ng 45 7h3y d0n'7 kn0w wh47'5 g01ng 0n f0r pr0p3r.

4nd...4ny0n3 w17h h3lm5-cl455 p51, l1k3 4ch374 541d.

8u7, uh, l00k 47 7h15??

-The camera still winks out and a bright, pulsing orb of red and blue light appears between his scarred hands. You're shit at changing the subject, Mituna.-

 

Wait~.
Mituna, are you that helmsman~?

 

Pretty sure you're one of the assholes.

 

n0, 1'm h15 3v1l 7w1n. 53r10u5ly, 7h0ugh, 1 d0 n07 l00k 7h47 84d 1n 7h47 5h07. 1'm n07 3v3n 8l00dy!!

 

I'm not going to argue~.
...sorry~.