shitposting rave 3: Dawn of the third rave

"He was. Mine died at the Cataracts, killed by Tori's blood."

 

...ah. So we were his end in both versions of our "story".

 

hi

 

"That's...a lotta calamari." Stan takes a deep breath. He's actually seen worse.

 

im gonna fuck that!

 

Ford starts to say something...and then thinks better of it, recounting the number of times he's seen Cronuses throw themselves bodily into the embrace of eldritch horrors. Unless Bill or something else that directly threatens his corner of the multiverse is involved, he is literally 8000% done (as Mabel would say) trying to prevent the inevitable.

"Technically...that's not a squid. Figuratively...I can fault your elocution but I cannot fault your general impression, Stanley. Unless you were actually planning to eat it, in which case I would say, it is probably poisonous, even if you find a large enough pot."

 

...that's interesting.

 

*ELDITCH DISTRESS. DO NOT FUCK CUTTLEDAD.*

 

[been there, done that.]

 

Simon pulls a damp, crumpled paper from his wasitcoat's pocket and hands it @Janie Doe.

It says

Not Gonna Follow You Here.
-Sam S.

"Quite peculiar but I have the notion I am supposed to pass this on to you, Miss."

 

Ford stares at the stranger. Great. Another one...

"...how?"

It occurs to him, after the words escape, that this may be a question nobody wants to hear answered. Himself included.

 

Do I need to bust out the misting bottles again.

 

"You are such a freak, Sixer." It's impossible to tell whether the tone of Stan's voice is meant to convey admiration or fear. Probably because he doesn't know, either.

Stan looks at the new Cronus. "Don't answer that."

 

"That was purely a scientific question, Stanley!" Ford sputters.

 

-She glances over it.-

Pfffft. No sense of adventure.

 

"I'd believe that if I didn't know some of the other things you've...done." Stan shrugs.

 

[i stretch.]

 

*has a guess about exactly what cronus stretches but decides not to share it with the class*

 

That's useful!

 

[I DON'T KNOW THIS MORTAL KID.]