shitposting rave 3: Dawn of the third rave

Good, I hope you choke on it.

 

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Don't be like that! What happened to caring about the guns?

 

The pragmatic answer is that showing compassion to others, especially consistently, serves both purposes of our mission - it improves our reputation in the wider universe, and hopefully the Galactic Council will take that into account when we finally reach them. And we haven't yet reached somewhere it would be safe for anyone to stay, even if they wished to, except Hedonia, and we hadn't gotten anyone new then.

 

I don't know what to tell you except I only actually like two people and you're not one of them!

 

Nooooo keep your fragging tentacles, no hentai. None.

Okay but that doesn't change the fact that someone out there could have said "x, y, and z are definitely going to kill you, here's how to avoid shoving your foot down your intake and mortally offending someone, oh and by the way here's a basic language starter so you don't have to risk downloading it from potentially-hostile locals and/or a corpse."

...uh. Sorry.

Which is why I offered to pick him up once I get off this mudball? You guys are a military mission too (or quasi-military, whatever), you can't go picking up stray civilians for keepsies every few megacycles.

Eurgh. Thanks for that, at least.

 

I think Congessi has approx as much brain problems as everyone else, aka she's got them. But I thought language was like, her thing, so I dunno what to tell you except maybe someone just didn't give it to you.

 

More for me, sib. Seriously though he's like a leech squid. A squeech, if you will.

But you've known me for at least two minutes how can you not love me?

 

They totally won't, though.

 

i think i started the trend and i should probably apologize for it

but i wont

 

:O !!!!!!!!!!!!

MR CUTIE FAAAAAAACE

 

That's racist.

I DON'T HAVE A FACE, SLAG FIR BRAINS.

 

-his wings droop visibly-

 

...unless it got lost in transit, nope. I am not actually completely awful at my job, rule one of infiltrating a new planet is getting the local language. Had a grand total of nothing to offer when we left, admittedly a little before the TEAM launch but still.

That word is bad and you should feel bad

It's okay, I still love you, pay no attention to the energon-pink mini behind the curtain yelling.

 

-She freezes in anxiety, optics dimming.-

 

You wanted an answer and you wanted the practicalities taken into account. You've got it. It's my job to try, regardless.

 

I regret nothing. But if you touch my trigger just right I'll feel so much better. Picture me winking again.

 

Awww you do! <3 My mr. cutie face, I AM SO HAPPY TO SEE CUTIE FACE!!!!!!!!!

 

Y'don't have t' hang around if y'don't like me, y'know. I'm a big mech, I can take it. Makes me feel worse thinkin' you're hangin' around cause y'think I need it, t'be honest.

 

Why are you this. Why are you the way you are. Pretend to be cool for like five seconds, I got an image of chillness to maintain.

 

Iiiit's...

not that?

-She cringes and hugs herself.-