shitposting rave 3: Dawn of the third rave

...where? Anywhere with energon's connected to the Council, and anywhere connected to the Council would turn us in or use us as... frag, what's the word, political... whatsist. Proof Cybertron's fragged up and can't do anything right. Don't have much info to give us anywau, the whole... isolated planet deal. "Here's the place, here's what the other teams figured out in the cycles before they cut contact, good fraggin' luck." A whole week down here is like. A record, I think.

...slag, does it count as a week if we left the cycle we landed? Better'n the guys that got shot out of the sky before they even landed properly, but...

 

...What the frag. A spacebridge isn't worth throwing people around with no info to die! If they'd been willing to wait longer, you could have had at least info from Devisiun on how our crashed Metrotitan, uh, failed to function in interesting but well-mapped-out-by-now ways, and I'm sure Ambassador Congessi could have gotten you basic language stuff if she knew the time crunch, she's a linguist, she could at least help you with the phrases people are most likely to be shouting at you and the social rules for reducing your chance of getting shot by rightly-paranoid scavengers. And that's not me dissing the colonists, okay, Devisiun was a fucking mess at first, we only got back on our stablizers because we had time and resources, and it sounds like these guys have only had time. Just the fact they're still around is amazing. Frag.

 

...I mean. Aside from one mess when we landed the locals have been the least trouble. Pits, some of them have been downright helpful. It's just the... everything else. The dying and the mud and the organics and the glitched-out cityspeaker and the everything. Everything is awful and we're back to, like, square two even if Barr pulls through the night.

 

I'm, uh.

I'm real sorry about your... trinemate, right? I'd point you at big, white, and faceless if you'd remember anything when you woke up, but I guess you're looking for a distraction, not advice.

 

...glitched out cityspeaker??

 

Fmpmfpmppfmmmpp pffppfmmpppffmpfmm mmmpffmpp mmpmffmfmmfmmpppff fmpmfpmmmppp Mmfmmmpfffmpppmmmmppp'fmm mmmfmmfmm.

 

vwhy do you alvways sound like youre choking on a sevwered dick!

 

Spoiler: nsfw

Fppmfpffm mpmppf ffmppffmf mmmpmffppmmmffmfmm fmmppmmpppmfpmf pmfmffpmpmpp ffmppffmf'fpmmpp mpffmfmmfpmpmppmpm mmm ppmppffmfpppfmpmmmmffppp ppfmpf fmppffmmmfmmmfp fmpmfpmppppp mfpmmmmpm mmm fmmmfpmfffmp mmpfmfpmppmpmmmpmpmpp?

 

i can speak your shitty language too!

*She presses the palm of her hand to her mouth, making a long fart noise.*

 

Spoiler: nsfw, sexist slur

Mfmppf fmmfmfmmfpmp ppfmpfmpf mmm fmpfmfpffmpm, mmpmfffmpmmfmfp!

 

*Itch continues to make fart noises, adding in a real one for good measure.*

 

Charming. I am coming to the conclusion that organics are a mistake.

 

....yeah. Pretty much. Who's faceless, why do 'bots keep taking everyone's faces? [His hold on Scope tightens.]

We think she's a cityspeaker? Or was? Or something? Does it count as cityspeaker...ing if they're hooked up to a spark instead of a brain? But mostly that was a huge dead end and she tried to kill us and everyone else 'cause one of our guide dudes pissed her off or something so that's great!

 

I'd say let the protos be protos, but somehow I don't think you got much experience with those either.

 

To err is to live, and to live is to err
Mistakes are the fuel of entropy
Of ingenious minds and perplexity
Though sometimes you have only prayer.

 

... Is that who you guys were talking about earlier?

 

Shhhh don't teach him about backreading

 

Ah yes, do insult things I have no control over. Is that how you govern your city, too, Judge of Scelus?

No one prays to me.

I am Unicron, Devourer of worlds. I do not care to know who you are.

I do not bother myself with the past.
[Never has a more blatant lie been spoken]

 

At least I do something instead of sitting in a corner and moping.

 

You have it backwards, four-horned god
Not being prayed to, but praying yourself
Or deep into your obstinacy delve
And bring forth that which you got.