shitposting rave 3: Dawn of the third rave

-The most suspicious kitten squint- "I bet most of the time it´s just a secret."

"See? Secret. How can a secret be dull?"

 

He is very smart. An inquisitive, scientific spark.We can hardly keep him out of trouble.
-The density of parental pride is high enough it would cause a black hole if such were possible.-

-Nichrome inclines her head in greeting, eyeing the small... organic. Turbofox? Probably-person.-

 

[Was Onyx always here? She is now, and is doing her best to not coo over the kitten. Business first.] We have several divine figures, anywhere between one and seven depending on how one wishes to organize. My siblings and I are spawned of one of these gods; Cybertronians are a further degree removed, being our own creations. Whether this last subset are divine in your own structure is... not visible to me.

 

Apologies, Captain - perhaps we wouldn't have so much if we weren't cleaning up after sparklings hopped up on sodium.
-he winks-

Well, a lot of my work is confidential because of patient privacy, so it is a secret in that way - but it's also inventory and the like.

 

Precisely why it'd be fun for you to explain. I'm always up to learning new ways to craft dirty jokes.

By it being a letter explaining something we all already know in overly flowery language. And that is all I will say on it.

Now what is this clever one's name?

He's your child then? He's adorable!

...? Greetings? Thank you for the sudden explanation either way. Also these sorts would be considered divine, yes. They are deities after all. Or at least the beings I know who look almost exactly like this.

 

-looks at you and knowingly nods back-

KON.

-snuggles on up to her more-

 

oh, i could show you dirty jokes. up close and personal if you wanted.

 

-Nichrome sighs, guiltily-
Your revenge is cruel, Captain. So cruel.

I carried him, yes. And he is.
-more glowing parental pride.-

 

That's the worst innuendo I've heard in a millenia, and my amica named his shuttle the Silver Streak.

 

-the fox turns back and shoots cronus a look. her ears are down and her teeth bared. she growls a bit-

 

(｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

Kind of both, sort of more because of the second one.

 

Oh, hush you.

-she picks up the small fox in one of her sets of arms and holds her affectionately-

See now you are nice and warm and can bite at anyone who gets a bit too close.

You'll have to excuse my friend here. She's a bit bitey as you can guess. Anyway, I'm not quite that eager to learn. Sorry.

I'm sure he'll grow up clever and strong.

 

-her ears are still down but she has stopped growling. really it seems like she's only "frowning" out of spite now-

 

-Soundwaves eyes widen, and his tailtip glows- "You´re big."

I bet you hide your secrets in the boring stuff so people will miss them!

"I´m Soundwave. Who´re you?"

 

lets see what the lady thinks of it, since i aint hitting on you.

wheres animal control when you need it.

i mean, fine. miss out on the dirty joke of a millennia. handcrafted by old great-great-great-more-greats grand-daddy ampora generations ago and passed down from father to son ever since. its your choice, i guess.

 

Duchess Bonds Xiaohe. Lovely name you have.

-she nuzzles the fox very tellingly at this statement-

Why it's here, of course. And, yes, it seems I'll have to miss that joke then. Shame that.

 

-oh no the ears are back up against her will. she still looks at cronus though. dead on-

 

And a good thing, too - but I still have to listen to it. If you can't be creative about it, could you at least try to be funny?

-he laughs-
No, I just don't write them down at all.

 

i dont think you understand what 'joke of the millennia' means. once i die, that jokes gone forever because children are hideous little shit-goblins that i dont want anywhere near me.

*Flips her off.*

twenty bucks, same as in town.

 

...oh. Manners. Yes. Greetings. [She bobs a shallow bow, wings flicking outwards.] Onyx Prime, Sparkseer and warden of Eukaris.

The distinction in our case seems to be how often control of universal forces manifest; the Hand and the Destroyer are... forces made metal, Creation or Death or Wisdom with faces; my siblings and I have various abilities, but nothing on the level of creating matter or erasing from existence; and the... mortals, for lack of a better word, are weaker still, and only rarely display abilities not granted by a physical component, for all their sparks burn just as bright.