shitposting rave 4: (almost) anything goes

*two norms now*

I really don't think you want an adult me, dude.

 

"Maybe a little," Mabel says, laughing. "I was thinking thoughts that were kind of rude, and I don't really need to know, but just tell me if genies have babies or not. Also, I dated a merman once, and now I'm wondering how that would have ever worked out when we got old enough."

"You know...I don't know." Mabel frowns, because if humans killed them all on Earth, it's even worse if they were sapient! "The ones we have at the house, though...when we give them meat, we give them each some, otherwise they will sit around and wait until the first one or two are finished and then they will eat in turns. They don't get all over each other to get at it, like some animals do. I think they figure things out a little bit. I was sure that when Manya started to get better, she'd be furious that my brother, Chroma and Brick are each keeping one of the pups she was too sick to take care of when we found her. But she just comes up to them and gives them the guilty-making look when she wants to groom or play with her pups. She's sad that her milk's dried up but she seems to be grateful we're feeding them?" Mabel worries her lip between her teeth. "They're pretty smart, whether or not they're sapient. One of my girlfriends has one that she's trained to walk on a lead, although they still seem to be having disagreements about whether ribbons belong on a thylacine. Of course, the ones we have knew my Dad from when he visited their planet, so...they weren't very afraid of us. Just cautious. The big male seems to have attached himself to Ma'Vali, our mother, like a guard dog."

 

I dunno. I've never seen any. But probably.

A merman? What's a merman?

 

...is that a euphemism..?

 

What's an euphemism? And is that other guy your twin?

 

...nah...i think he just shapeshifts into people...if he feels like it when they touch him...

 

Oh. Why'd he shapeshift into you?

 

[Taking notes.]

[Thankfully, this is dream meat and completely safe for consumption by anyone who can eat meat, even if it is still raw.]

Interesting! They're social even out of the juvenile stage, then? That they'd share even with a different species is still intriguing, but unless the lovely one here chooses to communicate further I suppose we'll have to watch and see for answers...

 

im sorry, who are you again.

 

An adult version of that little dude over there.

 

and why exactly should i care if another one of you pops up or not.

 

'Cause if you convince the little me to grow himself up, you'll end up with much more than you bargained for. And not in a good way.

 

aint bargaining for nothing. saying being a kid is a lot less fun than being an adult and if you CAN speed that along, you should.

 

Uh... 'if you stop being a little kid, I can tell you what blows.' Don't you think that sounds a little... suspicious?

 

because the FULL saying is 'blows donkey dicks'. yeesh, filthy mind much?

like id ever bang someone while looking like THIS, anyways.

 

A filthy mind?

Yeah, I have that.

But the suspicion comes from experience. Bad experience. With you Cronii and with life.

 

i havent even GONE by that name in YEARS.

 

...because he was forced to shapeshift into itch...and itch has poor hygiene.

[juice looks somewhat hurt]
...what's wrong with the way i look...exactly..?

 

A rose by any other name smells just as sweet. Or stinky, if the rose's one of you guys.

 

too short. looks wrong. feels weird.