shitposting rave 4: (almost) anything goes

(Oneira looks at her bowl of grubcorn, at the adults, and then at the qitten.)
Yo, I think I got something mildly more interesting than the semantics argument over there. It's a dented pocketwatch, and I have no idea how to get it undented and working again. Wanna have a look?

 

"I would not be down for slaughtering puppies," Ford says firmly. "I know. I'm no damn fun. I'm pitch for you because I'm pale for the multiverse. Let's get out of here."

 

"1t's s1cken1ng how adorable they are." Sunshine groans. "Also, 1 want to thank the docterror1st for surg1cally remov1ng that st1ck you had up your ass, Val1ska P1nes. Just because you and he 'transcend the quadrants' doesn't mean he shouldn't get to have a full set."

 

"Wasn't done with surgery." Valiska bounces a mi treat off the end of Sunshine's nose. "Though he did use his hands. Among other things."

 

How the fuck is This GuY the same Dualscar Gibs finds so damn funnY?
He's boring as fuck and throws hissY-fits when Someone gives a simplified explanation of kismesissitude to a non-Alternian robot alien.
I bet He couldn't tell a decent joke to save His life.

 

Sure, I can look. It´s awfully small though -he leans down to investigate, a magnifying lens appears without him even noticing.-

 

Well, it's me-sized, so...

((The pocketwatch looks like it deflected a blow. it is a bit dented inside and some of the gears have slipped out of their (beds? sockets? does that have a special name?). undenting these and putting them back into place should make the watch work again))

 

"He can't." Sunshine smiles. "He's an asshole. Sunsh1ne. Tyr1on Atbash, Or1on. Norm's matespr1t."

 

Vulcan Maleus.
I'm a recent subjugglator recruit, but I'm no laughsassin like Hlorri.
The thought of trapeze makes Me shudder almost as much as Gibs.
I mostlY just make random shit for MY troupe.
Even useless knowledge can turn out to be prettY fucking useful.

 

"1'm not sure any knowledge 1s ever completely useless, but that's what comes from hang1ng around w1th Stanford Fuck1ng Hotass P1nes." Sunshine shrugs.

 

-manages to sit up, though it makes her pupils go different sizes-

 

Sloane considered this. "Okay. I mean, I find it weird she'd take that name, but whatever. ....what exactly does 'pitch' mean in this context?"

"....I'm just going to assume that in the books, where The Dark Lord didn't win, there are actually some decent Malfoys. Or something like that. Because the only other available option is that she likes someone from a family where bigotry is pretty much the defining characteristic of the whole bunch. And bigotry is kind of what led to the genocide thing in the first place, so....not exactly cool with either."

"You could always take some Veritaserum!" Sloane offered. "Basically an unriggable lie detector--it's a truth potion. Of course, if you believe in sincerity something that isn't true, the potion won't know that....but neither would a lie detector test, so they're pretty much the same thing, but Veritaserum is not something you can rig. Might clear this whole mess up."

 

=(] persona77y.......i 7ove the trapeze
=(] theres a certain thri77 invo7ved
=(] in becoming so c7ose to death.......on7y to come de7ivering it yourse7f to those who wou7d forget their p7ace in our society
=(] words fai7 to describe how much i.......7ove it

 

Something bugging You, babe?
NormallY, this would be the part where AngrY Hlorri would get on MY case for calling The Grand Highblood Gibs.

Ehh, I'm just known for being something of a Troll MacgYver.

 

Pitch is hate to love and love to hate
A hunger tenderness plain cannot sate
A dance of force, of skill, of lust
Wariness entwined with trust

A... soul who could be better yet
And in turn in this pitch duet
Shows your shortcomings and cracks
Digs into them and pulls out the facts

In these you'll find both hate and strength
Thus carry on, and go the length
Patch and grow and work and learn
The next step of greatness, earn

And once you reaped what you have sown
You return the favour, dig into their own
Make them retreat and lick their wounds
To prepare for the subsequent rounds.

 

=(] p7ease do not use that human term of endearment on me
=(] i on7y have eyes for him.......and there are p7enty of other c7owns around
=(] however.......to answer your question.......ive simp7y been fee7ing rather g7oomy this perigee
=(] i find my heart is as f7eeting as the seasons.......you see

 

"....okay, so it's, what...." Sloane struggled to put the words together for a moment. "....it's like, you hate a person because they're better than you at things, so you want to be better than them, but you also are attracted to them, and by constantly trying to best them, you....end up learning and growing? Did I....did I get that right? I feel like I got part of it, at least."

 

[Vulcan recoils, as if struck]
*dejected* Yeah, but
Almost EverYone Else is
You know...
And We have some prettY wicked fun together while You're stoned or when You're feeling particularlY wild.
And besides, You have no chance with Him, and He'd eventuallY fucking kill You if He ever did reciprocate.

It's just
Can You reallY blame a girl for hoping for a motherfucking miracle?
[Vulcan goes off to sulk.]

 

(Lumipyry grins and reveals a row of very, very sharp and pointy chompers, also known as standard troll denta. She nods.)
Indeed, that which you spoke
Is one half of the pitch evoke
The other, by you in turn
Is to make them, too, learn

 

"Oooooh. Okay, I get it now. Thanks!" Sloane told her, unperturbed by her numerous sharp teeth--after all, she's pretty obviously not from Sloane's world, and while she might be dangerous anyway despite Sloane being unfamiliar with her, she did just take the time to explain what pitch meant, so....she couldn't be that bad. Or at least she didn't seem intent on killing Sloane right now.