shitposting rave 4: (almost) anything goes

Paz frowns. "First of all, I was born annoying. Second of all, if you want me to talk about something else, why don't you just talk to me about something else?"

"Hmm. Well maybe you're from a different Alternia." Paz shrugged. "You're still someone who brags about killing people and thinks the Empire is great because it kills lots of people who haven't done anything wrong."

 

I don't want to talk to you!

 

im allowved to brag about killing people as long as i dont complain about getting killed myself.

havwe i evwer complained about being dead.

 

"But here you are, doing it." Paz shrugs. "I thought we were kinda sorta like friends. We're clade. I've always liked you. I was a little worried about you at first because you were nice to me, but then you started telling me what you thought about different people, and I've seen that backfire on kids at boarding school, getting dragged into other people's fights. But you're Chroma's moirail. You're not nice. But you're good. And I'm not nice, either."

 

Augh, just shut up, I know you don't mean any of that! Go be a big tight friend-group with everyone else and stop trying to trick me!

 

"Seriously?" Paz shakes her head. "Look, we try to invite you to things. I know I'm closer to Dipper and Mabel than I am to you, but that's because Dipper and Mabel and I have been pee-your-pants-scared-for-our-lives together on multiple occasions and I'm dating him pale and her black. That doesn't mean I want to trick you. I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm not incredibly subtle."

 

-That just seems to wig her out more.-

It's really, really stupid how you think we have to be nicey-nice just because we live in the same house or have one friend in common.

 

"Now you're being dumb." Paz sighs. "There is an entire multiverse full of things that want to kill us. We're quadrant corners. If we don't try to get along with each other, it will be stressful on the people we care about most, and we all have enough stress. Even if I didn't like you, which I do, it's sensible for us to have each other's backs, because we're going to be on the same side of a fight, and living in the same house is easier if we try to get along."

 

You stress me out anyway! Stop trying to hold me down!

-She backs away from Paz.-

 

"I'm not even touching you. One hand's on my coffee and the other's on Cinnamon." Paz shakes her head. "You need therapy. But then, so do the rest of us."

 

You wanna know the difference between you and me, Paz? It's that when you came to Pennarian, you chose to come because you had nothing else going on for you. Which, I support that choice! When I came to Pennarian? It's because my fucking timeline collapsed and now there's some other Clover dealing with my mom and trying to find my sister and probably frigging dying somewhere because I've never been anything but a redundant idiot. Why does it surprise you that being around you and, and everyone else irritates the fuck out of me?

 

"It doesn't surprise me," says Paz. "I don't think about it that much. I'm glad Chroma can calm you down and I'm glad you trust Jame, because everyone should be able to trust someone. But if there's nothing left for you where you came from, that's all the more reason to try and make something for yourself where you are." She shrugs. "Stop thinking so much about how things should be. Should lives up in the aether somewhere. You're here. You're alive. You survived. Move forward."

 

I don't want more friends.

 

-dumps a bucket of cold tar on him-

 

... So, uh, is this a parallel universe thing, or.

 

"Bullshit," Paz says. "If you didn't want more friends, you wouldn't be complaining about not feeling like we're not your friends."

She winks at Static.

 

You're really smug.

 

Sorta. It gets confusing sometimes.

-thumbs up at Paz and Clover-

 

*The tar slides off very quickly, without sticking to him or leaving residue. He stares in judgmental silence.*