shitposting rave 4: (almost) anything goes

Paz snickers. It's true after all. "I'm a lesbian. I'm not going to reproduce without medical assistance, which is fine, because I don't want to." She shrugs. "The biological purpose of sex may be reproduction, but most people are not actually trying to reproduce when they have sex."

"Excuse me, have you met my clade? The trolls in it totally know how to bullshit, and they're better at it than you."

"So does Valiska." Paz shrugs. "And Loreli's blood is pinker than yours."

"That doesn't actually make sense though," says Paz. "An add-on constructed specifically for sexual purposes versus a reproductive system that happens to have sex as a bonus, but also involves things like going into heat or randomly leaking blood for one week out of every four?"

 

you also think im fucking the empress or something, so vwevwe established you dont knowv anything about trolls.

 

"Everybody here has PTSD," Paz says. "On top of that we're not allowed to have fun? Doesn't seem fair."

 

I don't have PTSD!

 

uh, yeah, no, maybe YOUR friend group is in desperate need of therapy and maybe a few happy pills, but the rest of us are perfectly fine.

 

"No, I was under the impression that you worked with her rather closely, but I have since been reminded that different things are true in different dimensions. I never accused you of banging her."

"Oh hi. I didn't know you were here. But, are you sure?" Paz raises an eyebrow. "I'm not saying that you do, because you know yourself better than me, but you sure act like it sometimes. And you know, it's okay, Clover. We're all friends."

 

ACTUALLY, THE FUN MAY REACH HIGHER LEVELS THAN PREVIOUSLY ALLOWED WITHOUT ATTRACTING LEGAL CONSEQUENCES! THIS POLICY IS TO BALANCE OUT THE AMOUNT OF NOT FUN THIS SPACE PRODUCES. THE SIGN IS SIMPLY A REMINDER TO BE AWARE IF YOUR FELLOW OCCUPANTS OF THIS SPACE!

 

I'm not friends with Cronus.

 

if different things are true in different dimensions then vwhy are you lecturing me about vwhat trolls supposedly do and dont do.

 

likewise.

 

-Thumbs up.-

 

"I didn't mean Cronus," Paz says. "I meant, clade. Although technically not everyone in the clade is besties or anything...we've got each other's backs, and we understand about that kind of stuff. Anyhow, look at the eevee we found! Did you have Pokemon in the world you came from, either as a game, or ... as actual sentient animals, like this little cutie?"

 

"What are you smok1ng?" Sunshine is still wearing sparklers attached to his horns.

 

What's a pokemon?

 

"Um...they're creatures from another dimension, but in my dimension, there was a game about them. A bunch of games. Some card games and some video games Anyhow, this is an eevee, which is a kind of pokemon." Paz pets both the eevee and the thylacine. She can multitask! "Eevees are just as cute as they are in the games, apparently."

 

i take it youvwe nevwer spent a sorrowvful day crying on the toilet.

 

"Can't say that 1 have," Sunshine says breezily. "Somet1mes my bulge acts l1ke 1t has a m1nd of 1ts own, but 1t's never tr1ed to go sw1mm1ng 1n the sh1tter."

 

I guess purple nurple's got an ass fetish.

 

if i admit i vwas fucking vwith the newvbies vwill you promise to literally nevwer say that sentence evwer again.

 

Yes.