shitposting rave 4: (almost) anything goes

Aww I kinda like what I did with that one. When she's not spitting or cursing the gold and silver accents look awfully cute. But not everyone LIKE puts as much effort in~

 

"We're in a dreamspace." Alex shrugs philosophically. "And Mason, you were never as good at the Dreaming as me."

She glances at the Princess. "Pretty sure things would go different if we were on an actual planet or spaceship," she says quietly. "And, also pretty sure that even if he does want to make out with you, at the moment he'd prefer to break your neck."

 

[Ophira is laughing so hard she amost chokes]
Cant Make The Captain Do Anything She Doesnt Want To Her Mind Is Iron And Spikes And Everything Nice And Shes Got That Idea In Her Head Where Shes Untouchable Untouchable Untouchable Dead On Sight If You Piss Her Off Youre Gonna Die Die Die
Pray She Doesnt Pay Attention To You More Or Im Getting Company And Then Ill Have To Strangle You And Eat You Because Shes All Mine, My Ship Mine Mine Mine.

 

"Don't you mean, 'he'd LIKE prefer to break your neck'?" Jezebel sighs. "And Wendy, you've already made that point."

 

Oh yes yes I'm LIKE not stupid, I get that he wants it pitch not flushed. What do you think I am, A wriggler?
[She's humming at her helmstroll, petting her cheek softly in a parody of affection.]

 

Mason is almost distracted from his rage by the mental image of what his uncle would have said if Jezebel had ever used grammar that bad in front of him.

 

Let's be honest: have you been sober longer than six minutes since I died?

 

-NOT NO FUCK NO-

Not here too. Fuck off. You're not real.

 

He also shrugs and leaves it at that, falling back into silence.

 

Much more likely to be real here. Isn't this a place for the dead and lost?

 

Doesn't explain why I've been seeing you awake, too. Fuck off, go away, I'm unconscious so I don't have to deal with you.

 

-a sharp, not-at-all-stifled laugh- No, you're unconscious so you don't have to deal with your latest bad decision. How's that coming along, by the way?

 

im late but theres a universe where ur bfs a cronus

do u want him

 

Alright, too low, I get it. How's the cute skeleton then?

 

"Please don't say things like that. They're so painful to hear." Lissa winces.

 

Sure, You can dress 'em up to make helms look nice and prettY, but it doesn't change the fact that what's underneath is a broken lowblood. She's gonna saY and do a lot of shit that ain't prettY, and no amount of training and conditioning can fix that.

'Sides, banter is fine when it comes to clowns with a sense of humor. A clown that doesn't appreciate funnY backtalk is a prettY shittY clown imo.
Y'know, I'm prettY sure The Grand Highblood heard Me calling Him Gibs to Hlorri during one of FightY Red's trials, and the guY fucking chuckled.
I nearlY shat MYself but He didn't do anYthing in response, Boss just laughed and sat there.

 

She's not haunting me across universes our ghosts don't even work that way. The evidence is solidly in "Local Spirit-Touched has officially Lost Her Shit"

 

Right like, if you want me to make you an exception to her filter, what do I get in response?
[She raises an eyebrow and crosses one long leg over the other. When did she sit down on an almost pornographically plush, pure lusus white chaise?]

 

Which, honestly, what the fuck else is new it's been a slow spiral downward in sanity for me since I first landed on the streets. I'd say she could stand to be a little less ambiguous but this is Zedra and not even at my most batshit would I sully her memory by not hallucinating her fucking with me.

...Depths I miss her.

 

jumping off of this i can prolly find a Personally Tailored Cronus^TM for All Yall if u want

level of accuracy varies