shitposting rave 4: (almost) anything goes

-is catapulted into the rave surrounded by the scent of burnt rubber and dead electronics-

-has brakes?

...-sudden change of environment! Looks around-

Oh, here again. Must have KO'd myself again!

I hope I'm not dead. I'm gonna be real mad if the piece of shit car killed me.

...

...

...the hood was on fire though.

 

Nice.

 

A blessing, I'm sure.

'Piece of shit car'? Was that a battle or an op gone wrong?

 

Yes, that is exactly the kind 9f thing y9u sh9uld 6e ann9uncing t9 the w9rld. What w9uld I ever d9 with9ut y9u?

*He seems vaguely less on edge, though.*

 

I just can't top it.

 

[You could probably cut steel with his smile.] No, you really couldn't. The pronoun's "him," though.

 

Not get to your universe sponsored fated destination.

 

Gotcha, Mr. Afterglow.

And good. It's intentional. That makes it better.

 

S9, tell me, is this heaven, hell, 9r a century 9r s9 waiting in lim69?

 

It is mine. If I wanted it changed I've had nearly seven million years to do so.

Some sort of spatiotemporal anomaly, near as I can tell. Which points to limbo, if I understand the terminology right?

 

Our cars aren't sentient yet. The singularity is nigh, but still out of reach and I don't drive the self-driving cars 'cause they're hackable and I know one of my enemies is just waiting to pull a "Can't let you do that, Dave." I just got to... um, test drive a new prototype. Very fast. On wet roads. Flooring it.

Findings: fast car is very fast. Integrity does not hold up when you hit the back of a bus. Or the street light. Or concrete dividers. The hood was on fire. Actually the hood came off and the stuff under it was on fire, but semantics.

 

W9nderful.

 

Ah! [Amused:] Well. Enjoy your testing, then.

 

Dream, as far as I can tell. Some sort of weird nebulous place too, universe-wise. Hence the bucket of bolts there and the hornless fellows. Which I'm guessing is more like Limbo but I've never been one for the religion thing. Never saw the point.

See. I don't get that.

Your adamant about it though and that I like.

 

I will once I wake up! Fortunately I think I saw water as I skipped over the divider so I'm probably not dead. Unless I drown.

-she's not dead and won't drown, fyi. Also she totally stole the car, if you hadn't figured that out-

 

So glad the organic avatar of destruction approves of me. [He rolls his eyes. Unfortunately, Handmaid must be a level 4 friend to unlock his backstory.]

 

Don't worry. You'll lose that approval point in live ten seconds.

 

The horror.

 

You will never reach Heaven without it.

 

The Allspark is a lie for frightened protoforms.