shitposting rave 4: (almost) anything goes

There's many theories. Most of them cycle back around to "Primus hates us". I am inclined to assume that anything involving an arbitrary imaginary being seeding our planet with glowy crystal shards and metal flowers is likely to be jetfuel. Presumably Cybertron has depleted the resources needed to produce both sparks and sentio metallico, or the mechanosphere of the planet was shifted considerably enough due to the pollutive influences of prolonged warfare, that the right conditions simply didn't occur anymore.

 

A [nursery/sanctum!] And some swarms get sparks from the Ground.

-happy charmed chirping-

 

But Caminus got sparks despite being shit outta resources.

 

Why would anyone need to seed the Ground? He can make sparks all by himself! Did you bring Refractor?

 

You and the rest of the survivors. Divine retribution? Millennia of warfare unintentionally sterilizing the planet? Lingering Dead Universe energy getting scattered by Lord Idiot's spacetime-rending "master plan"? Any of the eight trillion other conspiracy theories? Who knows?

 

I presume they are entirely different resources than the minerals we tend to mine for building and engineering, and energon deposits. The whole complex is not particularly well researched, you may thank the Primacy and their paranoia over slagging off their imaginary friend for that

 

Well... there was only like 44 of us on Devisiun last time. So it's not like it's going SUPER well.

 

... I... am an atheist. I do not believe Cybertron is a person with divine powers.

 

The imaginary friend we've met in here...?

 

[Refractor drops from the ceiling next to sprocket and begins groom-cuddling]

 

Shhhhh. Primus isn't real.
[... it's hard to tell if she's joking or not, but she definitely still refuses to believe in Primus' actual existence.]

 

-Lacuna snuggles up next to Afterglow harder.-

 

He´s the Ground! He makes sparks! How can you not believe in him?

[!!!!] -groom groom bugfriend-

Who´s Primus?

 

Is it alright if I hug you? [At least one of his arms is still occupied preening Thunderwing, but. She's right there.]

 

Primus is a Standard name for the Ground, basically.

 

-She nods.-

Please.

 

Primus is the divine mech you presumably are calling the ground.
Listen, I don't think religion... helps me? I prefer dealing in observable data points and research these days. Things like "unknowable, incomprehensible divine machinations" have no authority to me. Really i do think sparks come from the ground, since that is an observable, verifiable thing we have a lot of documentation on. I just don't feel particularly inclined to think of The Ground as a mech who will take our toys away if we misbehave. I'd prefer if we knew by which mechanism the Ground produces sparks so we may ensure that this mechanism continues working.

 

[He wraps his free arm around her shoulders, careful not to touch her wings.] Don't mind the Captain. Decepticons are... or were, anyway, actively discouraged from theistic belief.

 

Maybe people should ask Insecticons.

 

[GROOM-PET]
How are you?