shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

-Time to bite with fangs and rust-

 

Yes, yes, you're very bitter, we all-- hm, no, we don't all know this, probably just me and whoever else you've caught in here. Still. We did agree not to be on the same planet in the same universe again, even if this here isn't quite a planet. Don't know what you want me to do about it without breaking our word. I like a good bit of variation, but I do intend to keep most of my promises!

Oh, no, not really. More of a tantrum. Charming, aren't they? [He rolls his eyes, but is still grinning.]

 

[Time to turn the bit Abe's holding onto into another limb and bang him repeatedly against the ground like a hammer.]

☹︎♓︎&︎♏︎ ⧫︎♒︎♏︎ ◻︎❒︎□︎❍︎♓︎⬧︎♏︎ ⬥︎♏︎ ❍︎♋︎♎︎♏︎ ⧫︎□︎ ⬥︎□︎❒︎&︎ ⧫︎□︎♑︎♏︎⧫︎♒︎♏︎❒︎ ♐︎□︎❒︎ ⧫︎♒︎♏︎ ♌︎♏︎⧫︎⧫︎♏︎❒︎❍︎♏︎■︎⧫︎ □︎♐︎ ︎⍓︎♌︎♏︎❒︎⧫︎❒︎□︎■︎✍︎ ❄︎♒︎♋︎⧫︎ ⬥︎□︎❒︎&︎♏︎♎︎ □︎◆︎⧫︎ ⬥︎♏︎●︎●︎︎ ♎︎♓︎♎︎■︎︎⧫︎ ♓︎⧫︎✍︎

Spoiler: translation

Like the promise we made to work together for the betterment of Cybertron? That worked out well, didn't it?

 

[She regards Mala, expression mostly unreadable between the battlemask and the visor over her optic band]
When someone in my family is having a problem we usually try to talk it out after they've had time to cool off. But that might take a while, so who knows if you ahve time for that!

 

-abe gives no fucks because rave magic and tries to peel Malas plating off-

 

Oh, yes, I definitely could have done better there, I'm not denying that. We all could have. We did, in some cases! But the fact of the matter is I dislike entering Gamma 1005.24 more than is strictly necessary, and you're quite capable of both saving yourself and being rescued as it is. No need for me to get involved.

Oh, this isn't talking anything out, this is being a distraction. I do have time, though-- or, well, space, but the two are rather twisted up...

 

[She sighs, very softly and almost imperceptibly.]
They seem very upset with you anyway. Maybe you should.
[The last word sounds disappointed and disapproving n a level putting Optimus Prime to shame. In another life she would have been a kindergarten teacher.]

 

[Congrats, Abe, you've earned one (1) whole splinter of brassy metal. Good job. The hammering slows down, though-- someone's getting distracted...]

[They snort, twisting further around Vector's arm.] ✡︎♏︎⬧︎︎ ♍︎♋︎◻︎♋︎♌︎●︎♏︎ □︎♐︎ ⬧︎♋︎❖︎♓︎■︎♑︎ ❍︎⍓︎⬧︎♏︎●︎♐︎ ⬥︎♒︎♓︎●︎♏︎ ♍︎□︎❍︎◻︎●︎♏︎⧫︎♏︎●︎⍓︎ ♓︎❍︎❍︎□︎♌︎♓︎●︎♓︎⌘︎♏︎♎︎ ♋︎■︎♎︎ ♍︎◆︎⧫︎ □︎♐︎♐︎ ♐︎❒︎□︎❍︎ ⧫︎♒︎♏︎ ◻︎□︎◻︎◆︎●︎♋︎⧫︎♓︎□︎■︎. ⚐︎♌︎❖︎♓︎□︎◆︎⬧︎●︎⍓︎.

Spoiler: translation

Yes, capable of saving myself while completely immobilized and cut off from the population. Obviously.

 

-Many bite, punch anything that looks punchable.-

 

I am, in fact, listening. They will not until they've calmed down, which is my actual goal at the moment. I do actually remember my siblings, you know.

Things change very often, even when we don't expect them to. You know that better than most, Mala.

 

[A black-and-gold warrior-caste insecticon approaches, clicking reprimand, and raps one claw against the nearest bit of crystal.]

 

Do you... do you require assistance?

[She tilts her head a little]
Fair enough.

 

YOU ͜WANT ̡SO͘ME̴ TO̢O GLÌTCHS̶T͘ICK?͘ -Abe snarls and swipes at him.-

 

[He hops just out of range, still clicking.] Biting isn't working. Find a better tactic if you want him down.

 

-Growling-
I͘T̡´L̸L W̨O̶R̴K͢ F͞I̶NE O͞N͠ ͡ÝO҉Ų
-attempts to grab Sunscourge. He has to let go of Mala for this, though he shoots at him again just to make his point-

 

[Disgruntled, wordless grumbling.]

Oh, I don't know, do I?

Spoiler: robot body horror?

[Quicker than it would take to transform, the space around Amalgamous goes dim; the arm they're coiled around becomes a coil of wires snagging a de-armored limb, trailing away to an unseen ceiling. The rest of their body is a broken, twisted pile of scrap, unnaturally still given their usual constant motion; every now and then a flicker of faint blue-white light escapes from what might be the remnants of a spark chamber badly protected by the most intact pieces of armor. Very, very faintly, one might be able to make out the (similarly damaged) communications interface for a titan in citymode taking up one indistinct 'wall' beyond their twisted frame. Dried, crystallized energon crusts over broken fuel lines and the ground alike.]

 

[He hops away again, wings flicking. No plans to test his plating tonight, no sir, not when he doesn't have to and doesn't know what he's up against. Looks tasty, whoever he is, but das r00d.] Probably. Or you could find easier food. Have some cobalt if you promise to stop trying to hurt me.

 

-Time to attack the new creature-
I W͝A͏N͡T̴ TO K͏ÌLĹ ͝THAT͞ ͢SP̴AW͜Ń ͠O̷F͏ A ̛GL̕I͞TCH B͞U̢T͠ I̕´̷LL̵ ̀DO ̶Y͟O̸U ̧F́I͏R͘S͢T ͡IF̴ ̷Y̷O͞U ̡G҉ET IN҉ ͟MY ͠W̕A̢Y

 

[More sidestepping. Awww, look, even standards have proper babybug instincts, that's kind of cute. If Sunscourge had a mouth that worked that way, he'd be smiling; as it is, he flexes both sets of mandibles 'encouragingly' and chirps a little.] Was trying to help, but alright. Prefer solo kills to easy food? Strange.

 

I´M NO͠T͡ FO͜O̧D.̵ ͟I´̵LL͞ ̕T̀EACH͘ ̸YOU ́B̸O͠T͘H҉ IF̶ I HÁV͜E͠ T͢O̶!͏
-Goes after him, snarling and this time he follows when Sunscourge sidesteps-