shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

Mi!

 

The real question you should ask is who mislabeled the group therapy dimension as the 'shitposting rave'? I think we all deserve a couple answers to that one.

 

What are you doing here?

 

I... i like cartoons? I... i think...? A-and making inspiration boards about my history lessons. They're very color-coordinated and pretty, um...

 

Oh, hey, you're not in jail. What happened to turning yourself in for me, I thought we'd agreed on that.

 

Of course I didn't do that you asshole! What the fuck? Why would I do that? I have already had one (1) encounter with being falsely accused by police, not about to do that again!

 

Well, yeah. But I got you ice cream, didn't I?

 

It. Was. Mint. Chocolate. Chip. You even said you knew I hated mint. What the fuck dude.

 

is it even possible for felines to be traumatized
i mean probably but jasprose sure seemed not to care about her whole shit once she got yiffified

if this is group therapy it aint no therapy ive ever heard of
wheres the circle of chairs when do we start discussing our tragic pasts
trick question my tragic past is a secret that will only be revealed when the villain critically underestimates my badassitude

oh dude thats awesome i dabble in art but its uh not something youd want to see on tv
its a special brand of garbage
whats an inspiration board it sounds baller

 

Listen, if I knew you were going to whine about it so much, I'd have gotten you mint coconut chocolate chip, just to prove a point. All I'm saying is I did you a solid, so you could have done me one.

 

I... You.... Do you like, even know how people work? Do you just... I... There are so many things wrong with how you're approaching this situation and I don't even know how to explain them.

 

Group therapy my left foot. I´m just here for engex, rustflakes, and drama.

 

Mi? -mi lik the dave.-

 

Bunch of people whining about their problems? Yeah, sounds like group therapy. There aren't enough drinks for it to be a bar.

You know what? You're very mean to me. Consistently, I might add, which is a dumb thing for you to be.

You've gone and hurt all two of my feelings. Look at that. I hope you're proud of yourself.

Megatron has fallen, you lead the shitty psychotherapy dream dimension now?

 

You know what, you also ate like most of that ice cream too so it wasn't even originally for me. You've hurt none of my feelings but you endlessly confuse me.

What even feelings have I hurt? And come at me bruh, you can't touch this.

 

Speak for yourself.

Megatron is cordially invited to kiss my afterburner, and I´ve already got a job, thanks but no thanks.

 

[dave goes very, very still, and makes the tiniest :D expression]

the world is your oyster my man
[he summons an obnoxiously bright frosty beverage in a plastic mug, with a little umbrella sticking out of it. tragically, it's not actually alcoholic, but it probably contains enough sugar to down a horse]

 

O-oh it's um
See I'm a camera so I take lots of pictures! I don't even always notice, it's sort of like justlooking at things and oh, hey I could- and then I photograph, because that's what I do. So um. Then I sit down and I sort my files into categories and start adjusting the color balances so they coordinate with eachother and I make these... bigger canvas mix-matched pictures out of the photographs and sometimes other image files and video stills too? To make pretty things that also help me learn things! The history lessons stick far better if I make a board for every major battle of the civil war!

 

...it was supposed to be a medical procedure. A way to help people with buggy code work around that, or even get new programming if that's what they wanted.

Then, well. Dystopia followed by four million years of war. Slag got weaponized.

If Cybertron is a shitty psychotherapy dream dimension I seriously need to go back, migraines be damned.

 

Pride and umami.

And you took forever to show up. Of course I ate it.

Yeah, it's the wrong continuity for that quote, don't know why I thought you'd recognize it, but G1's a classic, isn't it?

Huh. Fair enough. Should've thought of that.

[There is now a fully stocked bar behind him, all brass and cherry wood, with very comfortable stools.]