sorry i don't make the rules: ridiculous/lighthearted headcanons

APH Greece, in the dub, hurriedly names one of his unnamed cats "Larry" when questioned by Japan. I like to think it stuck and he named some more of them Leslie, Margo, and Gerry.

 

@ChelG !!!!!!!!!!

 

Hahah, I often get asked if the reason @Valiska Pines is a terrible cook is because she's an obligate carnivore who can't taste sugar unless she puts enough of it in to break her pancreas.

(Like other cats, she can't really go too far off the Catkins diet without becoming ill.)

The answer to this question is no. Even she won't eat her own cooking if she has a choice.

Ford also notes that he frequently has to insist that Valiska allow him to cook what she kills before she eats any of it while they're travelling, as "Valiska ate it raw and is now writhing on the ground" is not his favourite method of discovering alien pathogens during dimensional travel.

 

After the events of Last One Out Of Beach City, Pearl began to look more into human music. Amethyst made her a mixtape. It's terrible.

 

Klavier Gavin doesn't even speak German. This is the reason his name is "piano" in German; he got it legally changed because "it is such a beautiful word, fraulein!" Kristoph is perpetually, quietly appalled.

 

dirk strider ironically unironically does tap

 

I bet it has Anaconda on it.

 

It also has the original Baby Got Back.

And the Jonathan Coulton cover.

 

I'm rereading my roommate's copy of Mistborn and it just occurred to me that everyone in the Final Empire who isn't Terris is probably lactose-intolerant.

This is clearly a very important worldbuilding detail.

Spoiler: A friend's gross, spoilery response which made me laugh

[12:29 AM] Dr. Perish: The Lord Ruler drinks a glass of milk and doesn't get the raging shits
[12:29 AM] Dr. Perish: it gets taken as evidence for him being a god

 

contrary to popular fanon belief, kankri is NOT organized or even particularly hygienic. he prefers to rot in his own filth and make self-righteous comments about how much he's suffering.

 

I tend to view it as his simply getting caught up in other things and forgetting about it. Until Porrim comes by and then he is fucking furious. But he never remembers. There is no time for cleaning I am an adult Porrim go away. THERE IS JUSTICE TO BE DISHED OUT.

 

You are aware that I wasn't even present for that incident, aren't you?

I thought three-part harmony was required because that's how Fiddleford, Dan and I defeated them. Even if I were tone-deaf, Fiddleford is a banjo player and Dan is obsessed with boy bands.

I have since amended the journal, because I'm actually very aware that my brother can't carry a tune in a bucket and neither Dipper nor Mabel has ever studied music theory.

 

(9:35:08 PM) ihasa: apparently one of the guys at my boardgame group has a friend nicknamed Shaggy, who looks and sounds exactly like Shaggy from scooby doo
(9:35:31 PM) ihasa: he has a masters in physics
(9:35:42 PM) ihasa: I am amused
(9:38:59 PM) Lizardlicks: ...
(9:39:09 PM) Lizardlicks: that's gonna be my head canon now
(9:39:18 PM) ihasa: hee

 

I hit the end of the first book in my Mistborn reread and only this time through did I catch that

Spoiler: Big ol' spoilers

Ruin tells Vin to go in to talk to Elend at the end. Since I can't think of any particular tactical advantage this would give Ruin, I have decided that Ati ships it.

I mean yes I realize that one could have not been Ruin, but this way is funnier.

 

* fondly remembers every Gerald Durrel book I've read *

 

When I was a lot younger I really liked Lawrence Durrell, then I read him as a grownup. OMG such sexist trash.

The other brother is probably a better read, I'd guess?

 

Probably. Gerald's focus was on animals. He did some "life embellished" stories, though, and most of them were great except the one which played paedophilia as funny.

 

So how would it look if your faves played D&D? I prefer to think of most of the characters I like being hopeless at it to the point of getting into fistfights over in-game conflicts and killing each others' characters over real life grudges, a la The Binder of Shame.

 

I have an entire "dnd aus" tag, and some highlights include:

• Golden Sun.
• Spoiler
• Persona 3 (spoilers)
  
• Tales of the Abyss (spoilers and #FUCKING JADE)
• Spoiler

I also have a very detailed headcanon for Radiant Historia, because of course I do. The central feature is exasperated first-time DM Stocke constantly having to retcon everything to keep his stupid friends from dying stupidly, and occasionally frantically texting his more-experienced friends Lippti and Teo for help behind the DM screen.

 

Headcanon:
Young Goodman Brown's experience in his story are all completely and one hundred percent what actually happened.