sorry i don't make the rules: ridiculous/lighthearted headcanons

I thought I was being snarky when I compared Hussie to Scratch and mused about him being the villain of the pink moon, but Aysha's self-insert in Pesterquest is pink and was controlling the reader throughout...

Are there fifteen crew members who'd be analogues to the fifteen Felt members?

 

Going from that video to this post is wild. Hooves that don't clop because they're coffee-filled balloons!

 

psychonauts 2: one character mentions raz's shoes are new, and sasha gave them to him after the interns stole his clothes claiming they were hand-me-downs.

therefore: those arent hand-me-downs, sasha saw a child with tattered patched clothing and decided to mail-order in some new clothes for him
razputin is going to figure it out at some point postgame and be like :/ sashaaaaa you said these had shrunk in the wash

 

That's adorable

 

psychonauts: since some of raz's psychic powers act odd due to his acrobat training etc - e.g. mental connection grappling hook thing instead of whatever the heck it's supposed to do - instead of the usual style of levitation flight, he's going to improve on that double jump into having a lot more jumps, so an adult raz would be running on/jumping between thought-bubbles that appear in the air at exactly the right moments. it has style

 

The party in Final Fantasy 6 shuffles around enough, and Shadow comes and goes enough, that I think it's possible to make it through the first half of the game without him ever interacting with the same characters twice. Does he even know they're connected. Does Sabin even explicitly state that he's with the Returners, or does Shadow just remember him as the crazy fucker who suplexed a train and then leapt down a Waterfall. I think Shadow just chalks up the entire incident as a particularly vivid guilt-based hallucination after witnessing the Poisoning of Doma. I don't quite know where I'm going with this. I think I just want Sabin and Shadow to have the world's weirdest reunion in the World of Ruin, where Shadow realizes that
1) The King of Figaro has a brother
2) Oh shit, it's crazy train man
3) crazy train man was real
And he has to go have an existential crisis for a half-hour

 

I'm fairly sure Marvus is psychically making people see what they want to see when they look at him, which would explain why he's described as "modest height" and "lanky" despite his appearance. (Not to mention why he seems in Reader's POV to have a bulging crotch, when the writers of Friendsim elsewhere mentioned the bulge-nook headcanon, which typically implies his parts should be sheathed internally.) Since Joey doesn't seem to be sexually attracted to men, or at least not to any of the men we've seen her around, I think she might be seeing him differently. She isn't blushing and stuttering like she does with Elwurd when she talks to him, so I think she's seeing him less as hypermasculine hunk and more as friendly but nonthreatening. Specifically, I wonder if she's seeing him as looking more like Xefros, the very embodiment of same among the trolls she's met so far.

 

Tumblr's hardcoreprocess has a royalty AU where the kids' names are shortened versions of fancy long fantasy names, and I like that idea, but only for the Dersites. Like, I think I'm gonna go with Rose's full first name being "Ambrosia" or something (can't think of one for Dave yet) and having about ninety middle names, Dave's full name is something weird too, while John and Jade are just "John" and "Jade".

ETA: Devereux. Perfect.

 

The aspect of Mind has been associated by theorists with masks, deception, and false-facing, so I'm pretty sure Karako can talk and is only honking for his own purposes.

 

My friend Dolly thinks this white rabbit named Max grew up to be this white rabbit named Max.

 

From a comment at Das Sporking on a bad Beauty and the Beast reworking:

 

From my friends Dolly and Wicked:

Spoiler: pokephilia

 

The Historical Paramedics are not time travellers, they're cosplayers with an ambulance scanner.

 

Prussia survived this long because he drank the Jagerbrau. Gilbird is his hat.

 

Since the Hetalia cast seemed to spend most of the first season's run on an island, I wonder if their humans intentionally stranded them there so they wouldn't get in the way, since most of them don't really seem competent to be involved in warfare.

 

Oh, found a rather sweet one in a fic; part of the reason Veneziano and Romano don't like to get involved in warfare is because they're linked as they now represent one country together, so whatever pain one feels, so will the other, and they don't want to harm each other. D'aww.

 

Since regular Prussia has Gilbird, is Nyotalia Prussia's bird named Julc-hen?

 

Pokemon movie headcanon for a movie I haven't watched in quite a while: Sir Aaron and his Lucario are revivable. Some fossil revival tech is going to get bothered by Mew to Get This Crystal Out Of Their House Slash Other Body and end up going on a small quest to revive the crystal with Mew's help and get a very confused Sir Aaron and Lucario out of it.

They're not in the afterlife in that credits scene they're just confusedly existing in the modern day.