Stray Thoughts [now liveblogging Deltarune ch 2]

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Ugh, it doesn't even want to fight us? Rouxls, you jerk.

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Oh, yeah! I maxed that stat out, didn't I? Thanks for noticing!

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Gee, it's almost like you never should have come here.

 

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Aww...

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Fluffy boys should be hugged at every opportunity.

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Same hat.

I mean, not literally. I wouldn't wear your chintzy garbage at knifepoint. But I also want to see that picture.

 

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That's no moon, that's a google search for "baseball through window". Though, I guess it's lucky that you apparently... google a lot of cute bedroom furniture?

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:-(

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"Hi Susie! Pay no attention to the statue of you standing right behind you! Boy, it's a good thing those enemies were there for no good reason, or it would have been kind of weird that you busted into my bedroom with an axe."

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How could lying to her about what's going on possibly help anything?

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... you didn't say what I said to say? Wow, it's almost like you're a different person who's not under my control in any way, and/or that my choices don't matter!

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See, Susie? This is why you don't chicken out and tell people their heroic adventure is just a dream.

 

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"No, I mostly stalk you on google... I mean, never mind... I mean, what statue?"

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In your bedroom.

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We noticed!

We also noticed, this Ferris wheel appears to be... rolling. And transporting you from one place to another. That's not... really how that's supposed to work.

Honestly, it kind of seems like dream logic. The tunnel of love acid at least got a nominal in-world explanation, even if it was completely threadbare. This is just ridiculous. It shouldn't exist, if it did exist it shouldn't have been in your bedroom that's actually a prison cell, and if it was there it shouldn't work like this. Dark worlds may be more responsive to lightners' desires and expectations than I thought...

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That's what I said.

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Boy, it sure is.

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She's been carrying you for like eight years, dude. She knows exactly how stupid you are. You didn't succeed in fooling her because, as previously discussed, she's smarter than you.

 

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Whaaaat? Yes! Gimme gimme gimme!

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Yeah? Show me!

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... Ralsei. What?

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And then... that's it. I'm being messed with, aren't I?

 

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No one can help me, I must face the glitchy trash man alone.

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... A shop interface. This is not what I was expecting. Though, honestly, I was expecting murder, and this is somewhat less disturbing than murder.

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Somehow I get the feeling that this product might not be able to perform as advertised.

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Yes?

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... okay, so, Spamton is completely insane, so it's possible that he's hallucinating or having a flashback here. But it's also possible that Kris - who I can't see right now, I notice - delivered some sort of silent threat themselves.

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O.o

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... which "you" would that be?

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Legendary salesman.

Then again, I'm pretty sure I'm here to unlock the optional boss, which will indeed kill me many times. So...

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Sold.

 

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Not sure why I'm going alone just because he told me to...

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Well, this is ominous.

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That's oddly specific.

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*pant*... *pant*... ffs, I died ten times on the stupid teacup minigame.

 

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Ooh, a shiny thing!

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... you have regressed in my absence.

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Sounds legit.

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Oh well, guess it wasn't an optional boss fight after all. Hum de dum, guess I'd better leave.

 

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Oh, hi Mark Spamton!

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I'm not sure being controlled is your problem, exactly.

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Uh-oh.

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I am once again disturbingly unsure about the meaning of the word "you" in this context. "Feeling seen" is not a comforting feeling just now...

 

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... so, I shouldn't have put my party-heal items in storage?

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Not just any friends! I have the gayest friends in the whole city.

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Here goes nothin'.

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Geez, this guy's crazier than the Jevil. If I keep beating up people this mentally ill, they're going to have to start calling me Batman.

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The game over screen from the teacup ride wasn't rude to me like this.

... Susie? Is that you?

 

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Okay... you definitely know something. Maybe I can ACT you into a state where you're coherent enough to explain?

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Instructions unclear, $!%! stuck in printing press.

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I... yes. I am definitely paying you back right now.

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Spamton. My friend. I'm afraid I have some bad news for you.

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Puppets don't turn into real boys when you cut their strings.

 

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... you know, I didn't think we were. RPG characters almost never talk about optional bosses, at least more than a couple words. Which is weird, now that I think about it, because they're usually the most fucked up part of the game. Like, the Anima fight in FF X was the most disturbing part of the series' most disturbing plot. It got barely any discussion from the characters, except one line during battle from Seymour if you summon her against him the last time you fight him. From a Doylist perspective, I guess it makes sense - these fights are after all optional. It's really hard to write a character arc with a significant beat that might or might not happen in any playthrough. But from a Watsonian perspective, it doesn't make any sense at all. Why didn't we ever talk about the super-powerful mad demon whose prison we unsealed and who we then put to sleep for centuries after a desperate battle? That was fucked up and weird and way more intense than the rest of the plot!

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And now he's equipment. A whole-ass person, very dangerous but also very traumatized and sick, who is now reduced to an item in the armors menu that I equipped on Ralsei for the magic bonus.

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That's... deeply creepy, actually. Of course it means something when a person is destroyed. "Just a corrupted program" - how did he become corrupted? Within this world, how did this society become capable of doing that to its people? From a broader perspective, how did it happen that a bunch of misaligned ones and zeroes on a disk in the library computer lab, of no particular moral weight, become the tormented person who just tried to kill us? And from a narrative perspective, if it didn't mean anything, we wouldn't be talking about it.

Also, he didn't turn into our "ally." He turned into an object, a thing in a menu that makes our numbers go up. Your numbers in particular, in fact - which was entirely predictable. You have the lowest HP and you're the only one whose magic stat is actually useful. Of course a good piece of armor with a magic bonus is going to you.

And it did not escape my notice that you're talking like someone who's used a computer in the light world. You know perfectly well that everyone we meet here is going to turn back into an inanimate object as soon as Kris shuts that fountain off, except for the ones we choose to co-opt to expand your domain. Right now you're treating Spamton exactly that callously, and trying to get us to do so too.

 

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Well, since you mention it,

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I doubt they are. I'm kinda freaked out myself.

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So... Susie's question was whispered... but Kris' response was shouted? Poor kid...

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Fluffy boys should be hugged... I guess... honestly I'm not really feeling it right now. And come to think of it, Kris is just standing there, unresponsive.

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... wow. I... think that actually is good advice for trauma, and the reason traditional talk therapy doesn't work too well on PTSD. And yet, I do not get a good feeling hearing that from you right now.

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... you are sweet, though.

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For all we know, that could literally be true.

 

Back to mandatory plot...

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Apparently the last month in this setting is "JANOVYE"

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You wouldn't download a statue...

 

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It's always a weird feeling walking up to a final boss after beating the optional boss. Like "yes yes, you're very scary, it's all so climactic, but I just beat someone way tougher than you."

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Do you want antis? Because that's how you get antis.

 

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So... why is the internet out? It clearly wasn't your idea.

(she's referring to Noelle in the following:)

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Problem: girl is sad about sick family.
Solution: trap everyone on the internet forever

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So... wait... if you know this world was created recently... but you still think you were having thoughts and experiences before then...??

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Shades of Isaac Asimov, if Isaac Asimov had a narcissistic mom who was so desperate to be loved that she sabotaged herself by being controlling.

 

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Yeah... she really thinks everyone will be happy here.

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Perish in the bosom. Once again, my choices don't matter.

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Yup, you definitely weren't the one who cut the internet.

(TP: nice!)

 

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I dunno, try unplugging it and plugging it back in the other way round.

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Well, it's not like we actually attack or anything.

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Birdly's weapon... is that a... hal-bird?

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Then perish.

 

(Halbird killed me. Deltarune is continuing to be made of puns)

 

The nature of humanity something something
(or is it simply the nature of Homestuck-adjacent game creators)