Super General Advice (the thread for advice without making a thread)

i'd take two things of parchment paper, and make like a .... parchment paper-wrap-parchment paper sandwhich? (put the wrap laid flat between the paper, basically)

set that on an ironing board, and iron on the very lowest setting you have, then let cool

the oven idea might also work, but i know the method i have saved for making beeswax wraps is basically that

 

unfortunately, I don't have an iron :/ I'll start keeping a lookout at Goodwills though, that does sound like it would work pretty well!

 

i know i got my small dorm/apartment iron for >15$?

also, so my concern against the oven is uneven melting and spread of wax, but honestly, you can do the same parchment paper/wax wrap layering, pop it in the oven, and then take like a tongue depressor/big popsicle stick, and use the long flat edge to smooth the top? and then put it back in the oven as necessary to get everything melted and smoothed out enough

i'd just check it pretty often, because you don't want the wax to overheat, and i know in my oven, for example, that it doesn't heat very evenly, so i have to move things around if i want even heating/cooking. if you know your own oven/that isn't a concern tho, it's probably fine!

 

honestly I'm more worried about the button and string getting messed up somehow - if I was making this from scratch I could just add them later, but as is I'm going to have to work around them. I'll try that parchment paper thing though, it seems likely to work!

 

My partner and I recently moved in together. We live in the southwest US and it's hot as hell. I tend to dress for the outside weather so I wear a lot of short sleeves and tank tops and skirts, but due to a combination of dysphoria and things they are incapable of explaining to me they wear a sweatshirt at pretty much all times. They also like having the air conditioning on blast, and it's gotten to the point where I'm way too cold most of the time. I've asked them to turn it up, but they get overheated and uncomfortable with even a minor temperature increase. I have no idea what to do, which of us needs to adjust, or if we just need to leave it as is. Help?

 

If there’s any way to physically divide some personal space, be it a bedroom or office or anything, that might help make the general situation more tolerable. A window unit in one particular room might make a higher average temperature more tolerable by creating a comfortable escape? Cracking a window in a room just a bit to warm it up a bit?

I’m very sensitive to cold, but I find heavy clothing difficult and saddening to wear around the house for various reasons. Because it gets cold where I am, I have a radiator-style space heater I use in the winter in my bedroom if the temperature in the rest of the house is too cold. Because the house has central air, I go out of my way to strategically block off air flow to my room and add extra insulation where possible, so that we’re not paying through the nose to maintain different temperatures. It makes me a lot more tolerant of things like watching movies with a blanket if it doesn’t feel like yet another wearying example of how I always feel cold.

Provided it’s reasonably possible and you can accommodate the cost, I think it’s very much worthwhile to make sure you can be comfortable in your home. The mental strain of frequent discomfort, even if it’s relatively mild, is huge. If you can’t divide the space, I think it’s absolutely fair to request that you divide the time so that both of you are able to trust that you’ll have an opportunity to be comfortable in your home. It does wonders for stability.

For emergency quick fixes, hot showers are great for temporary resistance to chill. Iced beverages or food can help with heat, like putting fruit or yogurt in the freezer for a while before consuming.

There’s also cultures of the world who live in very hot conditions and wear clothing that provides excellent coverage. If your partner is willing, maybe it would be worth looking into what textiles they’re using?

 

Also re: dividing space, close the heating vents in places you'd like to have warmer while the AC is on.

 

can anyone suggest good crochet gift items for someone who is very pregnant and/or has a newborn?

my best friend is having a baby, and i've been working on crocheting a few baby gifts. however, her life has gotten very stressful lately-- a death in the family, another family member in the hospital-- and now i want to make something for her personally, as well. i'd like it to be something that's both comforting and useful, for the final trimester of the pregnancy and early months of parenthood. the baby is due at the end of October, and my first thought was a hot water bottle cover, or maybe a set of slippers, or something like that. but i've never been pregnant, so i'd love some suggestions on what someone who is very pregnant/a new parent would appreciate.

 

From my sister in law: everyone who can do fibrecraft makes newborn clothes, and she would have really appreciated a nursing shawl, lap blanket or a crib blanket instead.

 

I found out some of my fanfic ended up being mocked on Something Awful, and I know it doesn't really matter but I still feel kinda crummy. What's a good way to think about this?

 

'people who mock other people's fic in public are assholes comparable to schoolyard bullies who make fun of your art project'

like yes it sucks but perhaps this is a good moment to consider that 'mocking someone's fanfic in public' is a bit of an asshole thing to do, stop doing and supporting it and get on with your own writing without paying attention to them. Don't Feed The Trolls, because that's what those people are.

 

I feel they should be allowed to if they want. I just don't like it that my writing's not perfect enough that there's nothing to mock about it. I know that's not possible, but that's still my reaction. I'm also nervous about it turning into direct harassment, because I attracted the attention of a 4chan douchebag for a while in my teens.

 

i think you're enforcing this mindset in yourself by hanging out in communities build on finding things to mock in other people's work. Because yeah, turns out that building a foundation on 'making fun of someone else's work' feels pretty shitty when you're on the receiving end. Nobody's saying that those people can't mock you, or anyone else. They obviously can. but that doesn't make it less of a douche move, and maybe you should take this as a sign that you should move on from those communities and find a more sustainable way to further your own writing

 

If they're having fun, that's fine. What I'm concerned about is it turning into directly harassing me or my acquaintances.

 

"Someone cared enough to go looking for it and send links around" is one way to think about it, I guess, though maybe not the best one? Or "people are going to like different things and mock different things, so this just shows that I don't have this in common with them" is another one. The big thing is that there's nothing you can do to be perfect, so accepting that people are dicks online sometimes is better, especially if you can remove yourself from the space they're being dicks in.

'Someone didn't like my fic. My fic isn't for everyone. That's okay, because not everyone's fics are for me. This isn't something that actually matters in the long run.'

I don't know if you can do anything to prevent harassment though, so I'm sorry your anxiety is latching onto that as well. If your fic accounts are attached to your main accounts, that's really the only thing you can change; until it does escalate, I don't think you can report anything.

 

I really want to get a thicker skin, because my rational side thinks it's kind of funny but my anxiety does not. I kind of want to be able to join in making fun of myself but I just can't, and I wish I could. I admire people who can. I guess I knew it would be polarising when I wrote it, though.

And yeah, you're right, worry about that if it happens.

 

Honestly, on actually thinking about it, I was worried about the wrong thing - I don't care if strangers hate my writing, I just don't want to risk them calling my house. I've seen harassment campaigns against people who dared to be weird on the internet before and it's scary.

 

What's a good book on How To Draw Human People, aimed at the absolute beginner?