The Grouch's Trash Pile [Baldur's Gate 3]

I also made a dude to speed through Robert's bad route and Joseph's routes - the kind of guy who calls himself sensitive and easy going, which means he mostly avoids any hard emotional work and goes with what feels good in the moment. A disaster man to go through these disaster 'relationships'. Robert's is just sad; Joseph's is frustrating, and it's interesting that I totally called it wrt his family drama being something not worth getting entangled in. Joseph clearly needs someone outside of the family to help him sort his shit out... that he won't want to fuck. :|

I ALSO did the thing to see the Secret Cult Ending and, god, it was stupid. Funny and vaguely creepy, but incredibly B-movie horror campy stupidness. Now that I've seen it I super don't understand why there was a big outcry about it one way or another when it was originally datamined, or why people whine now that the devs say it's firmly not something canonical to the universe. Of course it's not canonical, it's REALLY DUMB!!!

Anyway.

I want to do one more playthrough where I befriend(?) Mary (who I still think is an asshole, but now that I understand just why she's an asshole I have a lot more sympathy) and date... idk, maybe Robert? I think the sort of guy I'd play who would be interested in Robert would also be cool with Mary to some extent.

 

As much as I would like to be a fancy princely locks, classy shirts, waistcoats and cravats person, I am really solidly a canvas sneakers, skinny jeans, hoodies and leather jackets person.

I’m okay with that, I just get kinda wistful sometimes.

 

The benefit of having had to start over with the Java course is even with struggling through the text with my rudimentary Finnish and google translate, concepts are explained MUCH better.

 

I mean sometimes translate comes out with garbled nonsense, but still

 

Oh man was I ever disappointed with the way the Joseph route ultimately ended up.

I romanced him right off the bat because I thought -- I hoped -- his path was going to be a serious, empathetic, thoughtful exploration of the difficulties being religious (namely Christian) and gay, with a family, and how the lies can spiral everything out of control and how painful the lie is, not just to you but those you love. How the desperation and pretense can lead to terrible things, even when it was never your intention.

Basically I wanted Joe's story from Angels in America but with a happier ending.

BUT NOPE, Joseph's just a holy thot hungry for dick and Mary gets fucked over and nobody's happy because somebody on the dev team had an axe to grind I guess.

I didn't even need then to fall in love & Joseph leave Mary for me, I just wanted to be thier friend and help them make that hard decision

I HAVE A LOT OF UNRESOLVED FEELINGS I GUESS I'm sorry >>;

 

Joseph's route can apparently go two ways - I got the 'good' ending where at Amanda's party (!!) he's like oh, I'm calling it off and staying with Mary because I want to make it work with her!!! I guess the bad end is where he's like "I'm staying married but you can stay my piece on the side! :D" which is... really something! What a mess.

I started a new playthrough where I'm hopefully going to befriend Mary (as much as is possible anyway) while pursuing either Robert or Damien. I have a pretty elaborate headcanon for this PC since I used a concept I was thinking about making into a SWL character; I'll write it down tomorrow or this weekend, since I have to be in bed in... half an hour. Whoops :D;;

 

Spoiler: FC drama (sorta)

The (ex?) friend that got all anti at me on Twitter a while ago has been an absolute pill in the FC discord for a while - dropping passive aggressive images and non sequitur ‘jokes’ into chat at odd times and sometimes very obviously changing the subject. I started noticing they did this whenever the subject was something they didn’t like or someone they didn’t like was talking, and other times I’m assuming when they weren’t interested in the topic and wanted to make people talk about something else, even if they weren’t participating originally and even if it shut the convo down altogether.

Last night they started a STUPID argument with Paula when she was boggling at some weird comments on a Twitter thread they’d posted- they didn’t want to know about the comments but rather than just say that and stop interacting, they got really pissy and went on about how they didn’t appreciate stuff like that “being brought to their doorstep” (in a PUBLIC CHAT CHANNEL THAT THEY DON’T OWN) and how people like that commenter are so unpleasant and blah blah blah - basically a “Stop talking about this! Meanwhile I’ll talk about it as much as I please!” Move.

I told them to stop participating if they didn’t want to have the conversation, they got madder and said it was a convo between two people, I pointed out that hey, public chat channel, they huffed about they guessed they couldn’t have their boundaries respected, and flounced to (according to the actual server owner who was on her last nerve with this person) go vague on their Twitter about how they felt so free now and they’d wanted to leave for so long but felt like they couldn’t.

The kicker is that they’d left the FC to start one with other friends MONTHS before, but were still in the discord every single day, having (and sometimes dominating) conversations, and often hassling one particular guy. Like??? If they’d hated it so badly why did they participate so damn much? Why did they constantly ramble on about their interests to us? Why were they THAT EAGER to jump in and fuss whenever someone talked about something they don’t like?

It gets to me because for a long time they seemed very sweet and kind and friendly, but in the last, eh... year or so? They’ve been increasingly tetchy and passive aggressively bossy and behavior policing about pretty innocuous stuff (like me trying to talk about how a recent plot point made me really sad).

Anyway that bullshit kept me from sleeping very well, even though everyone that cared to comment on it was like “yeah that person has been a weirdly aggressive pain in the ass lately, no surprise they finally flounced,” and the server owner thanked me for stepping in since she was working at the time.

I’m sort of grimly curious as to what half baked vague half truths they’re going to tell about the fc, but I’m not going to go looking.

 

IN OTHER NEWS, my new Dadsona/SWL character concept is Ripley:



He's a trans dude who grew up working class in a small rural town (a little art imitating life there). He was seen as a weird gender nonconforming girl with really weird interests (because if you have plain old weird interests as a girl back when and where I grew up, they were considered EXTRA weird) - he regularly spent whatever money he could scrape up on the Weekly World News and any new-to-him books on unexplained phenomena he could find at the local used bookstore.

He did go to college because his parents insisted - went before financial aid was horribly gutted in the 2000s, so he does have a degree in something or another. It was there he found out that trans people are a Thing, not just something gross dudes make uncomfortable jokes about, and that means trans men are a thing. He had an immediate epiphany and pursued transition ASAP. He may have ended up switching colleges partway through just to ease his transition a little, and maybe to get even further away from his hometown, getting away from where people only knew him as his deadname and where they'd meet him as Ripley - as in Ripley's Believe-it-or-not, because he's a total dork that way.

I figure this iteration of Ripley started rooming with Craig around then, and I figure they were both weird punk kids at the time. They met Alex during some of their shenanigans and Ripley and him bonded fast. Things got rocky when they were careless about protection and Ripley ended up pregnant, but Ripley realized that hell yeah he wanted to be a dad - just the one kid, but he wanted this one - and Alex was like, hell yes I want to be a dad too and want you to be my husband!! So it worked out, but that's why Ripley had a hell of a time finishing his degree, and why he's kinda young to have a daughter old enough to be headed to college soon herself.

Whatever he majored in, he eventually ended up being a mechanic (maybe accounting, and he ended up doing the accounting for the shop he worked at as well as working on actual vehicles). College never filed off his rough around the edges look and attitude. He's kind of crass and blunt and generally sardonic and takes a certain amount of pride of being the weird redneck aging punk in his friend groups, but he makes a serious effort not to be a bigot or an asshole. Unlike the marshmallow the Dadsona is portrayed as, he actually does own and ride a motorcycle can and has thrown down in a fight.

(As a side note, it's kind of funny to me when motorcycles are portrayed as something only ~bad boys~ ride. My grandfather had a motorcycle for a long time that he got and maintained when he was in his 50s, and he's this guy who grew up rural and lived in rural places pretty much all his life, was a logger for decades. My asshole ex's mom (who was cool, unlike him) regularly went to motorcycle rallies with her husband on their touring bike. My sister races motorcycles for fun. They're just not that strange to me.)

 

Most motorcycle people i know are Big Nerds. Mini Moto enthusiasts, OTOH, are fucking nuts.

 

Finished Robert's route - it was REALLY good. Ripley was a great choice to round out Robert and Mary's sad disaster duo, the bullshit they get up to is precisely the kind of bullshit Ripley thinks is a reasonable kind of fun, because he's never really stopped being kind of a hooligan. Like, the ghost walk thing is something I can see Dave getting a kick out of but I don't think he's got the kind of rough-and-tumble attitude to find the initial date stuff with all the hard drinking fun.

The shenanigans made me laugh a lot and the more serious stuff was really touching.

 

!! AUD SENT ME CHEEEEEESE POWDER!!!!!!!!!

I can finally, finally have mac and cheese again. ; ; (I have gone without because like hell was I going to go to an import store and pay 5€ for a box of kraft dinner just for one cheese packet...!)

 

Flouncer has not left Discord Owner's private linkshell, which is... ???

It's beyond me how someone wouldn't be incredibly embarrassed to stick around people who they'd recently made overdramatic vaguetweets about ~cutting ties~ with.

 

tfw halfway through making your plans for the day you remember you have a Social Obligation that's going to make it impossible to do more than maybe half of them

*lies down*

Part of me is upset and wants to get out of it but the rest of me knows I won't be happy with myself if I do. Just, ugh. I wish I'd remembered so I'd have been prepared and could have scheduled accordingly. (I also wish my Introvert Social Energy Reserves were a little deeper so that the prospect of in-person social interaction on my non-workshop days didn't fill me with dread, but there's only so much I can do about that.)

 

My good sense, exasperated: I know those are licorice all sorts in that dish and you fucking love licorice all sorts but most licorice has wheat in it, you will be sorry

Me: just one
Me: or a few
Me: ... a few more

Me, an hour later: wow, I don’t feel very good! pikachuface.png

My good sense: *facepalm*

 

I’m just gonna have to keep making this same stupid mistake for a while before I really learn

 

There is someone here giving a presentation about... something. She talks way too fast and the slides have way too much text for me to follow before she moves on. It’s like having my adhd artificially turned up to 11.

Seriously why do these slides have SO MUCH text? This would be nearly impenetrable in English.

 

I’m also asking myself what the hell I’m even going to do with Java once I’ve learned enough to do anything with it. Apparently it’s one of THOSE days.

 

I need to figure out something Creative I can do on my commute, instead of endlessly scrolling social media. I’m finally feeling a deep need to create, but I’m too tired to do it when I get home.

I’m thinking of finding something I can do on a tablet, like some little drawing program I can use with a stylus, or a way to take notes... I know, paper is a thing, but I hate writing by hand, and I hate retyping handwritten notes. Shame my elderly netbook no longer holds a charge.

Crocheting is an option, if I can figure out what to make, and what to do with it. One person only needs so many hats.

 

My tumblr queue ran dry, and I noticed that the last post it made was the 25,000th post on my tumblr. I'm tempted to just never post there again in order to preserve that perfect number.

 

anyway



Yisun makes a fantastic murder hobo.