THE SPACE NAVY AU (18+)

You laugh, a trifle bitterly. "It's not exactly difficult to look mournful when I'm confined to my damn fourwheel device. The trick's getting anything done when everyone wants to bung pillows and blankets and snacks at my head and call Lainey to drag me back to my hive."

That sounded extremely self pitying. Damn. You rally and say, "Well, let's give it a try. He might not be so bad, what? We're going to need to come to some sort of agreement, regardless, and I've certainly played sillier parts to keep this old heap supplied."

 

"I'm not going to be able to get you guys to have a proper sleep first, am I?" you pout.

 

You hesitate, looking at Bel sidelong. "We did nap," you hedge.

 

"We did," you agree. When Pancho scowls, you gently boop her snoot. "Shoosh. Your concern is appreciated but this is important, and we did nap. You're the one who's been up forever. Want me to tuck you in?"

She pouts for another moment, then confesses, "Yes."

You scoop her up and carry her off to the respiteblock. She rests her head on your shoulder and goes all soft, finally surrendering to her fatigue. Everything is diamonds.

 

Kadros comes back glowing like a lamp and you smile, flick a stray legume at him. "It can wait, if you want some, er, private time," you tell him. "I'll hang a sock on your door and everything."

 

"She's already asleep," you smile, shaking your head slightly. "I don't think she could have stayed awake for cuddles if she tried. Do you have your --" You pause as Loggan trundles past you into the respiteblock, trailed by fluffcheeps. "Your four-wheel device, or do we need to go get it?" you finish.

(leaving it up to you whether itsy/reggie forgives erskin for falling over loudly)

 

"Oh, it should be around here somewhere— Lainey got fed up with how I kept trying to ditch it places and got Arguus to adjust things so that it captchalogues itself back into my sylladex when it's not in use." You pull it out and swing yourself over into the seat, then hook an elbow over the back and twist to give Kadros a stern look.

"If you even think of wheeling me around I'm going to bite you," you warn.

Itsy eases into the room, following her brood, and detours to rub apologetically against you. You bundle her into your lap and give her a long, lingering squeeze— it's hard not to get the sniffles all over again when she spreads her wings just like she used to and tucks your face up under one, preening your hair. There's a chorus of peeps from the respite block and she wavers, shifting her weight about on her haunches, and you pull free with a final sniff and pat.

"Go on, shoo," you tell her. "It's alright, I've got business, I'll see you right afterwards."

She hops down, gives you a last, lingering look, and trots off to join the last straggling marshmallowbeasts.

"What a bizarre situation," you say.

(she wasn't offended, just startled and then embarrassed, i think? and is also generally horrified that her kid's in such bad shape.)

 

Just finished changing into your proper uniform, you nod agreement. "I can't get over it. Itsy's been looking for her troll ever since Pancho found her. I guess it'd be weirder if you were a more common color, but still." You check yourself in the ablutionblock mirror, making sure you haven't misbuttoned something, and then stride out to hold the door for him. "After you, Captain."

 

"Yes, that was always the problem, really— there's precious few high-violet lusii kicking about, and by the time you get to indigo even a lot of them are as prone to, er, being as absolutely bugfuck loony as their potential wards. " You give Kadros a quick grin, wheeling past him out into the hallway. It always takes a bit of concentration to get back up to speed, moving along like this.

"Anyway, at the time I was— bereft?— left to my own devices? There were only a few of them on planet: most of them emphatically spoken for, one of them Gl'bgolyb, who, er, wasn't interested, and the rest immature enough that it would have been uselessly cruel to go steal them from the caverns. I've been offered adoption matches from time to time, with the lesser violet lusii that have lost their charges in battle and are looking for a new troll, but nothing ever came of it. You know when it's your lusus."

 

"Yeah, you... wait, when you say wasn't interested, you don't mean you asked her?"

 

"Oh, well, yes, actually," you say. "Snuck down after an Orphaner to find her and, er, made some sort of case for myself, presumably. Next thing I can figure I'm a thousand miles inland on the biggest Eastern continent and headed straight for the center. She said no."

At the look he gives you, you add, defensively: "I was very young, you know, I was only just eight. We all do silly things when we're eight."

 

"That's not silly, that's epic," you gawk. "I mean. Dumb as hell. But epic."

 

You grin shyly. "Well, that's alright then. And anyway it all worked out, didn't it? With all sorts of unexpected benefits such as, I don't get carnage dreams, and I show up as 'dead' on most psychic readings." You tap your noggin. "Seriously, if you have any unsuspecting psychic friends, I can hide in a closet and then jump out and go 'boo!' and they scatter like baby hopbeasts. It's fantastic."

 

"That's so weird. And a little concerning, but also kind of great. I'm just impressed you survived it. I wish I did have psychic friends so I could see you do your surprise routine. But I only know people with self-affecting psi like Pancho's body-shifting."

 

"She can body-shift? That's fascinating, how often does she do it? Is it voluntary? Can she do animals, like in movies, or just make her claws longer or what?"

 

"No, she can't do animals, and she can't change her horns or blood color. But she can change her build, as long as her mass is the same. She used to mirror me when we'd practice fistkind, but I got too big. Ask her about it, she'll show you, she's not embarrassed."

 

"Oh, I say, that's absolutely fantastic. D'you think she could do an impression of me? We could slap on some pink paint and send her in to meetings. I'll never have to wear a dress jacket again."

 

"I would pay cash money to see that."

 

"I would accept your cash money! Where is Whitey, anyway?"

You consult your phone. Arguus has left a series of diffident, yet increasingly plaintive, text requests for assistance re: rousting a surplus seadweller out of the hive.

"He's bunked over at Lainey's," you say. "He doesn't recruit, does he? If he's laid so much as an inquisitive glance on Arguus I'll, I'll— I'll kick him straight outdoors! See if I won't!"

 

"He claims not to. Says he takes helmsmen from competitors' ships rather than simply blowing the ships up because wasting such a rare resource is stupid. I gave him a chewing-out about it once because those are probably black-market helmsmen captured planetside and started too young, but he laughed at me. Anyway, I think our psionics are as safe as they are with any other captain aboard. Still, we can't let him upset Arguus. Arguus is a precious cinnamon troll."