Which kintsugijin should you fight?

@Fish butt
See, that just makes me scared. You have a lower center of gravity, you have a combative knowledge of where to put elbows and tickles for best result, and you probably run faster.
The only way I win is if I turn this into a "get the thing on the highest shelf" contest
:D

 

@boyacrossthestreet it's funny, I'm not exactly short when you take average size into account, but living in the Netherlands for eleven years you get a little nit of a height complex, haha. Also every apartment we ever lived in, the spyhole in the door was too tall for me, my father, or my mother.

Now I live here in the US, and I still have the tendency to look around for someone to help me get stuff off the top shelf until I remember that taller people are rarer here.

Edit: I'm a pushover, fite me.

 

Somehow that reminds me of this:


(I mean, they're Swedish buttttttttttt)

Well, I'm 6'1, maybe I should move to the Netherlands and feel a little short every once in a while

 

@boyacrossthestreet great, you gave me another reason for not hating the swedes. :p

 

*puts my ä ö ü and ß into this thread* technically German has a 30 letter alphabet. Suck on THAT America.

 

Don't fight @jacktrash on most days, really, Seebs will find you and make you feel guilty about it.

 

I'm gorramn tiny. Also, I am awesome at high shelves. I am the fucking king of shelves. I never met a shelf which didn't bow to my hellacious radnasty climbing wizardry. C'mon, man, challenge me to a high-shelf contest. Fuckin' do it. There is even a chance you will win if you pick the battleground carefully, because I am easily-distracted and there is a nonzero chance I will forget the contest entirely in favour of seeing how far I can climb.

 

*the thing is only midway up the shelves*
* @sicknastyspades makes it up to the ceiling and continues across it because fuck you bro, fuck this contest, i don't need the thing, i got gravity on my side*

 

Man, when I was a small kid, I was a climbing fiend. Tree over two stories tall? *climbs and enjoys looking at all the lost toys while swaying*Upper closet shelf? *scales walls* High kitchen cabinet? *climbs on counter tops, potential does weird balance act if it's off to the side*

But now? Bleh. I can maybe make it up to the lowest branch of a tree, or I get a stool or tall people for things.

#yes I would be okay being significantly shorter and lighter than I am now #being grown up sucks

 

I used to be able to climb trees. now i just drape myself on them and whine pathetically.

(i am an excellent stretcher, though. periodically i freak my friends out by grabbing something that looks like it was very out of reach. i just unfold. it's great)

 

Now I'm getting tree-climbing nostalgia. We hsven't got good climbing trees around here - most of the ones with sticky-out bits low enough to use to get up are pines, and the branches get pretty thin pretty fast. Bluhh.

Also I'm an adult and that means I wear shoes a lot more than I used to and climbing trees is better without shoes.

 

Doing literally everything is better without shoes, which is unfortunate since a) they're required in most scenarios and b) I really do enjoy wearing heels to make myself taller.

 

Shoes aren't required so much when you let people know you're disabled - I haven't worn any in much more than ten years :)

 

@Lissa Lysik'an sneaky! Shoes don't trigger any sensory issues for me though, I just hate them. :P

 

(someone please do this for me this is hilarious)
@Missfortunate
Do not fight Missfortunate, she has enough weapons to supply a small army and knows how to use them. Plus, why would you even try? She's such a cute.

 

Can this still be a thing?
Can someone do one for me again?

 

SOUNDS LIKE @peripheral'S LOOKIN' TO START A FIGHT

 

FIGHT ME