Which kintsugijin should you fight?

Don't fight @michinyo. She's been working so hard and constantly. Why would you do that? Not only is it shitty and mean, but you won't even get satisfaction out of your punches, she has survived worse stuff and you don't compare, and you will still feel guilty. Look, challenge her at baking, that's much better. You'll have fun and learn lots and then you get a great prize of delicious cookies.

Besides, harm my moirail and you're dead. You are so dead. I'm coming after you. I have friends everywhere. You can't hide on any continent. You can't escape. You will pass into fevered dreams and see her face. Think about what you've done, y chingate cabrón.

 

fight me?

 

You could probably fight @Deresto, in theory. But the guy had a Bro Strider avatar for a long time--are you sure you wanna risk it?

 

Would you fight me

 

....fite me

 

Why would you fight @Bel Capricorn ? Don't fight them! They are too nice to be fought. Also, they can and will fight back.

 

fight me too

 

If people fight you, they will be stuck in your magnificently floofy hair. And then they will just be trapped their forever.

 

fight me if you dare.

 

i mean lbr you're not wrong

 

This is a good thread.

 

Okay, first off, you'd be a dick for fighting @BlackholeKG in the first place. But if you did, I'm pretty sure their rad musical skills could kill you in one hit.

As for @esotericPrognosticator, he is apparently many gays, and there's strength in numbers. You'd be overwhelmed.

Do not fight Blackhole OR EP. Neither of those hypothetical fights would end well.

(Edited to fix a pronoun issue. Sorry, EP!)

 

I'm absolutely gonna do a huge one soon. PREPARE YOURSELVES

 

@Acey don't sweat it! I didn't even see your original message. (btw, if the pronouns you originally used were they/them, that would've been totally fine; I don't really have a preference.)

and yes, my swarm of gay is too much for anyone but me to handle. you've all been warned.

 

so many gays

 

@lilacsofthedead sorry friend!! Damn brain's gendered flowers...will edit momentarily.

also y'all should fight me.

 

FIGHT ME, PEOPLE

 

Spoiler: I DID AS MANY AS I COULD

@Acey: You could probably fight me. I am tiny and weak. But I have access to an exacto knife and one of those cat self-defense things, and I can scream really, really loudly. Do you wanna deal with ruptured eardrums? No? I didn't think so.

@ADigitalMagician: Do NOT fight Piper. If her snark doesn't kill you, her mad witch skills definitely will.

@applechime: Why would you fight an apple? Apples are delicious and good for you. Except you shouldn't eat Apple, because that would be mean and she's done nothing to deserve it.

@Avery: If their avatar is any indication, Avery is an actual Jolteon. They could electrocute you. That's no fun. You probably should not fight Avery.

@Bel Capricorn: If you fight Bel, you are an asshole. Bel does not deserve your bullshit.

@Beldaran: Beldaran is obviously a Mameshiba. She is an endless font of knowledge. This almost certainly means she knows precisely how to kick your fucking ass. But she wouldn't, because she is nice.

@chaoticArbiter: Do you have any idea how rare shinies are? Why the fuck would you cause a shiny Eevee to faint? That's just silly. MAYBE you could throw a Pokeball at them, but if you catch them, you had BETTER treat them right and feed them plenty of Pokepuffs.

@Choco: Choco is completely wrapped in clingfilm. Choco likely has an extra supply of clingfilm. Either you're gonna die of asphyxiation, or you're gonna get so horny from the clingfilm that you get an anime nosebleed and die of blood loss. Do not fight Choco.

@Ducks: Ducks is a sweetie and does not deserve to be fought. If you ever want her to go away for some reason (but why would you, you meanie?), just throw some breadcrumbs in her general direction and leave. Ducks like breadcrumbs, right?

@emythos: Em has the best lipstick ever, and if there's one thing I've learned from MSPA, it's that lipstick can turn into a chainsaw. Do you really wanna fight someone with a fucking chainsaw?

@Hobo: You've seen Hobo's avatar. You've probably tried to fight her (oh God, did you try), and you probably lost.

@Imoyram: You monster.

@IvyLB: You probably wouldn't win, but they might give you some good fashion tips, so I guess it's worth a try.

@jacktrash: Jesse would destroy you. Do not fight Jesse.

@Kaylotta: Kaylotta is probably too nice to fight you. It just wouldn't be fair.

@Keleviel: Look, if you fight Keleviel, @Void will fucking murder you.

@Kishona: My name is Acey. You tried to fight my girlfriend. Prepare to die.

@littlemissCodeless: Cody is a cat. You'd get scratches all over. And why would you fight an adorable kitty cat, anyway?

@michinyo: After all she's gone through, fighting Michi would be a massive dick move. Plus you'd probably lose anyway. Owls are birds of prey, after all. (Also, @Raire would NOT let this slide.)

@Morven: Morven knows Freyja. Do you really wanna fight someone who's pals with a Norse goddess? That seems like a recipe for disaster on your end.

@Neurogabu: My name is Acey. You tried to fight my best friend. Prepare to die.

@peripheral: DICK MOVE. Do not fight him.

@Petra: Petra's icon seems to denote Mad Kicking Skills. She would probably be able to kick the shit out of you, and then she'd be sad that she hurt you and comfort you and tend to your injuries.

@prismaticvoid: Jo goes to renaissance faires. She probably has access to a lot of badass weapons from that time period. Do not fight Jo. You will die.

@Raire: Raire is a total cinnamon roll. You'd probably get all sticky from cinnamon goop and frosting. Also, dick move, because fighting cinnamon rolls is always a dick move.

@rats: Rats are the best animal. Why the fuck would you fight rats.

@seebs: Seebs could fight you, probably. It'd be a battle of wits, and she would win. She would definitely win.

@Starcrossedsky: Nai would break one of their rare failed glass projects and stab you. Do not fight Nai.

@TheMockingCrows: Crows are badass. As such, TheMockingCrows is definitely badass. And their icon is Dave. Dave is badass. You will lose. Badly.

@unknownanonymous: They can summon a goddamn genie and wish for anything to happen to you. They probably wouldn't, but the possibility is there. Don't risk it.

@Vast Derp: We all know what happens when you fight Luka, and that thing is that you lose. Forever.

@Vacuum Energy: VE wrote an entire book, and could definitely give you a concussion with that book. Books are heavy. Do not fight VE.

@Void: You will stare directly into the Void, and the Void will wonk first. Plus, they're basically Lapis, and they can and will drown you. Do not fight Void.

TL;DR: Do not fight anyone on Kintsugi. You'll lose, or feel really awful forever, or both.

 

Would you fight me?


Also eta @Acey that is amusing however my not being good at reading tone has me confused about whether I am the monster or the person trying to fight me is a monster