Wiwaxia runs a SBURB D&D(ish) game - logdump/spectating/popcorn thread!

Yeah, sure! Also, is there character and planet descriptions hidden somewhere?

 

Ah yes, I should probably edit that into the first post.

One sec.

 

@TheSeer and done!

 

Next question: should I try to do everyone, or focus on Leon and let the others do theirs? And @Wiwaxia do you have the timeline comparisons handy? I might try to structure it hour-by-hour.

Edit: I had a better idea. Here's the first part of the recap.

Spoiler: Sessions 1-3

Hey guys, it’s ya boy Leon, coming to you live from the Land of Roads and Memory. Since I’m the resident Seer, I figured it’d be handy to keep a little summary of our session so far.

So, we start out by arriving on our relative planets. I’ve got a bit of a head start ‘cause I found this walkthrough before we started. Good to be prepared, right? Don’t worry about how I got it. Important thing is, I’ve got a rough idea of what we’re in for. Lemi’s in first, then me, then Sera, then Moss, then Ilmatar, and finally Myrtha.

First thing that happens is that Sera goes off the grid. Kinda weird, she’s not the type to do that. That’s more Ilmatar’s thing. Love her to bits, but god I worry about her. Well, I worry about all of them. Which I tell them. A lot. We all kind of discuss what’s going on. Looks like Lemi’s planet is totally dark (and all her lights are busted), Moss’s is a desert, Myrtha’s has a bunch of telephone poles, and Ilmatar is on some rainbow fairyland, which sounds about right. Me, I’ve got highways for days. Also water. Lotta water. And imps. And no Tia.

Tia’s my … uh, Tia. She likes spooky shit. Which is why I’ve got Onryousprite. If I recall, Lemi has her big sis, Myrtha has her dad, Ilmatar has her Mama, Sera lives with her aunt, and Moss, uh … yeah. Moving on.

Lemi immediately runs into an imp, which pretty much sets the scene for her adventures. She kills it pretty easily. My apartment gets overrun with imps as well. While I’m locking myself in my room, Myrtha, Moss and Ilmatar are all looking for things with which to make better weapons. Moss and Ilmatar get imp’d, and Lemi’s TV gets smashed while she fights another imp.

There’s fighting. Like, a bunch of fighting. Let’s skip that. Oh, but we find out that some imps have an Air of Malaise that sucks your health when you’re near them, and others can transform. Like the one Myrtha fights that becomes a chair.

More fighting; Ilmatar now has a sweet knife-fan. Myrtha runs into a motherfucking ogre. She and Flagcoonsprite double-team it, but its touch turns her clothes and some of her skin and hair blue. It then transforms into her Dad and punches her. I attempt to retake my apartment and almost fail, before Onryousprite saves my ass by screaming at the imps. Good ghost, best friend.

Ilmatar has the saddest battle with an ogre, which mostly involves them both punching the air/the ground. She then has a sudden flash of intelligence and remembers that she PROTOTYPED A SHAPESHIFTER YOU MORON.

I put a collander on my head.

Ilmatar explores her land, which is covered in beautiful bismuth mountains and rice paddies, and meets some cute salamanders. You know what I have? Roads. Roads and water. I find an abandoned convenience store and buy some bug snacks. And so ends session three!

 

I vote for 'recap ALL THE THINGS' and oh Leon.

also wait Moss' land isn't a blue desert, that's Myrtha's. Moss has a greyish-brown wastelandy deal, right?

 

There was sand and I got confused

 

Sand is very confusing. Anakin had the right idea all along.

 

I'm usually not a visual arts guy, but I like colors and I guess I'm sperging on this game so I did Leon looking out over LORAM:

Spoiler: full image

My only way to scan it was my smartphone camera though, so it's a bit blurry...

 

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love it thank you!!!

 

aaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!!

this makes me so happy to hear, you have no idea
:333

hopefully i'll have the spoons to plop down another big fat hunk of logs for you tomorrow

 

Likewise, you've inspired me to continue my recapping!

Spoiler: Part 2: Shit Gets Real(er)

We start with Lemi in her dark apartment. There are shadowy shapes taking form, and they’re not friendly. Candles seem to scare them off, thankfully.


Jumping back a few hours -- hey, like I said, I’m the Time player -- Moss is loading up their combat modus with books and gardening implements. Outside, the world is pretty deserty and dry-looking. They head down to their garden and find some vegetables.


Hours in the future, Myrtha wakes up and chats with Ilmatar, Moss, Lemi, and me. We discuss transportation (no-one is allowed to enter Valhalla, no matter how shiny and chrome they are), nutrition (Moss’ problem, since all I’ve got is bug snacks), and our meeting point (Myrtha’s place). It’s pretty important that we all get together sooner rather than later. Getting through the gates presents its own set of issues, and that’s not even considering the fact that Lemi and I will need to go through Sera’s land.


In the past, Moss gets tangled up in some vines and kicks/books the shit outta some imps, then goes to take a nap.


Ilmatar continues to talk to some cute salamanders. They speak of a Mage, and a Sea of Storms, and a village crone who can tell her more, because it’s Ilmatar and if anyone is going to turn this goddamn nightmare of a game into a fantasy RPG it’s her. I send her the code for the bug snacks, since she asked. She finds the village, which is also made of bismuth, and approaches the crone’s house …


… and we swap to Myrtha. She follows the tracks of her dad’s car out to an ink-black river, then returns to her house, where Flagcoonsprite drops some cryptic remarks about battlefields and the forces of light. She goes upstairs and punches a bunch of imps, then retreats to eat some curry.


Lemi is still sneaking around her house, this time looking for something to use as armour, but Sis’ room is predictably locked. She makes an attempt to prototype Nessiesprite in order to talk to it, but no dice. While she’s getting attacked by a wraith, Ilmatar and I are providing moral support via Pesterchum, and I fire up Sburb to see if some interior redecorating might help. Lemi attempts to talk to the wraith with Ilmatar’s assistance, but it’s not cooperating. We collectively decide that we need to get Lemi out of there.


There’s a conversation. Maybe I’ll just put it here.


NI: i should hopefully be able to build you some kind of stairs...hopefully
AG:But I've not been killing enough imps...
NI: argh. okay. dammit, if i could get enough grist for gristtorrent...
AG: Ah no you shouldn't use your grist on me! You'll need it!
AG: Really, I can figure something out, I shouldn't have bothered you guys...
NI: don't be ridiculous, we need you
NI: this is a co-op game
BI: lemi you dumbdumb
BI: thats what friends are for
AG: But friends shouldn't drag other friends down...
NI: ok this is going to sound harsh but
BI: friends should keep each other alive when theyre in peril
NI: keeping you alive is way more important than "being dragged down"
BI: and i have the nagging feeling that we're gonna need everyone for this story.
NI: we're gonna save you and you're gonna like it!
AG: If you say so...


That’s Lemi for you, I guess. If Ilmatar and I hadn’t been online … Anyway. So, I start throwing shit around. I smack the wraith with a chair (not very effective), Lemi’s broken TV (effective), and her toilet (VERY effective). I also accidentally punch a hole through her wall. For some reason, I can hear a song playing in the back of my mind while we discuss the logistics of throwing candles onto the ground floor.


That doesn’t work quite as well as we’d hoped, so Lemi retreats and returns to trying to prototype Nessesprite. She makes an impassioned defense of her broken TV as representing human culture, which is both doomed and dead … and succeeds, creating Nessievisionsprite. The two of them take on the imps and wraiths with renewed vigour. She makes it downstairs, grabs a garbage can lid for a shield and eats a protein bar.

[EOE1]

 

...I am reminded of one of Myrtha's incidents...

 

Spoiler: A2A1

Ilmatar starts the act strong by confusing the shit outta some poor salamander and getting some lore from the village crone. I’m not going to pretend I understand it, but the gist is: there’s a big monster sleeping inside Ilmatar’s world, guarding a Grist Hoard and creating all the underlings from a Sea of Storms. Dark clouds gather on the horizon.


Myrtha wanders and takes some sweet pictures. Pity they get corrupted when she tries to send them to us. A sandstorm kicks up. Also, she starts hearing voices. And something is pretending to be Ilmatar, but only Myrtha can see it.


The storm hits Ilmatar. She tumbles down the rice paddies, hurting herself pretty badly and getting herself soaked. This continues for some time. But she manages to make it home and have a nice hot chocolate.


I alchemise myself a torch and set off to explore underneath my building. I proceed to nearly cut myself open on a rusted door, drop my torch into the water and fall on my ass. And get some sorta gross slimy stuff all over me. Then I lose my temper and bash down the door, and take a bath in the ocean. Blech.


After a nice long sleep, Ilmatar starts building up Moss’ house. Must be nice to have a server player. There are some serious architectural shenanigans, but it all looks pretty stable. Moss’ balls get moved. Poor guy.


Myrtha attempts to get the drop on the imps in the armoury, but just kinda hurts her shoulder instead. She does do some sweet ballet to not impale herself on a sword though, and the imps go down. She acquires a Bigass Pile ‘o Weapons and a desert-worthy outfit.


T=9hrs: Moss wakes up on Prospit, the lucky bastard, and meets up with their contact, the Pragmatic Shopkeep. The armies of Prospit are off to war, but that’s about all PS knows, other than something about ‘the power of creation’ and ‘the speaker of the Vast Croak’. TS (Terse Shoemaker? Note to self -- ask Moss later) is even less helpful, but mentions something about a change in the air; droughts and storms. Kind of a theme, lately.


On waking, Moss explores the area around their house and spots three Ogres. There is tree-based combat, involving the judicious use of trowels. They successfully kill all of them (narrowly avoiding death-by-falling), then do some fucking sweet acrobatics on the way down. They then … spend an hour playing in mud? What? Why?


Uh, anyway. The Tireless Author, a Dersite carapacian, approaches! She and Moss have an illuminating chat. She’s here to report on the drought, and notes that the natives of the land are alligators, and that … oh. Hm. (Note to self -- get someone to the Royal Library on Derse -- there are books on the history of LORAM, which is my land!) There’s also some talk of horrorterrors, monarchy, that kinda stuff.


In the futurepast, I’m trying to get Lemi up to her gate. There are wraiths fucking everywhere. We chat a little, about how scared we both are, about how it’s not a waste of time for me to be helping her … yeah. She picks up a bunch of fabric and makes a rope.


Somewhere, a song is playing. The tower shakes. A massive wraith makes its assault. Lemi ties her rope tight. I throw a wall at the wraith. Lemi jumps --


And lands deep in the forest. (At this point, I log off and have a misadventure in the basement. Time shenanigans!)

 

Oh yeah, I still need to figure out what's going on there...

 

i guess "tomorrow" means "in a week" but w/e

Spoiler: moss and ilmatar hang out some more, leon starts picking his way into a ruined building and the dice throw me a curveball

Wiwaxia (GM): (nb, moss has had many, many cloud visions over the time he's been awake on prospit)
Ilmatar Nordwind: The your woods one I was in, actually. One of the reasons I also wanted to hug you.
Moss Kaplan: ((i forgot that, but i
'm pretending that it was only today visions haha))
...Uh.
(moss wants clarification but also doesn't want clarification. moss/ life is hard)
Ilmatar Nordwind: ((how socially inept should i play ilmatar? zero filter, or some sort of sense for inappropriate topics?))
Wiwaxia (GM): ((your call. also note that dream-personality is often subtly different from waking personality, but how so and how much is also your call))
Ilmatar Nordwind: ((ok, then waking ilmatar would*ve probably recognized one of the signs of "this is not a good topic to breach at this point", and dreaming ilmatar is just filter, whats a filter))
Moss Kaplan: ((oh good that's way more fun.))
Ilmatar Nordwind: I was flying about and hearing crying and was like, sorry bout the sudden dream tower on your plants it'll disappear again in a second, and then I found you but you weren't crying because of that, but because you'd found your mom, or what was left of her, at least, and you looked so alone, so I tried to hug you and tell you it's ok and you won't be alone for long, but I couldn't touch you, so I thought, when I meet Moss and they can see me I'm going to hug them.
I didn't expect to get to do that so soon!
Ilmatar Nordwind smiles.
Wiwaxia (GM): ((oh nooooo))
Moss Kaplan: (i feel like you may have successfully bluescreened moss forever)
(fortunately there are things to say while bluescreened)
(like)
Uh.
Karrin Blue: ((ohnoooooo))
Moss Kaplan: Thank. You?
(the face in my head for this is so great i may have to draw it up someday)
Ilmatar Nordwind: ((::DD))
Eheheh!
Ilmatar Nordwind hugs Moss again.
Moss Kaplan: (moss continues to look vaguely in shock and alarmed)
Ilmatar Nordwind: You see? I'm here. And I'll build up your tower when I wake up and we'll get everyone else together, Lems and Myrtha and Leon and Sera and you and me. It'll be like a sleepover with an adventure!
Karrin Blue: Ilm, kids and fun is not literal
Moss Kaplan: Oh
Awesome
Ilmatar Nordwind: ((ilma is just a bullied kid who copes via gratutious escapism and sburb plays. right. into. it)
It'll be! We'll be a legendary group of heros, rising to vanquish the evil that has befallen these lands!
Moss Kaplan: ((moss is just so bad at people anyway and finds refuge in facts and books from unpredictable things. this game is so hard))
Wiwaxia (GM): as if on cue, the cloud surrounding the tower whips away, replacing the murky, watery light with the brilliant clear blue light of Skaia
Moss Kaplan: (moss is also trying to figure out if they should mention the fact that they're pretty sure the huge drought and war and stuff is because of the game that they're all playing)
Karrin Blue: I hope Myrtha can get a nap soon
a dersenap i mean
(Not) Literally A Bird: meanwhile, leon
Moss Kaplan: (like, in a strict moralistic viewpoint, we could all be the evil. kind of.)
Wiwaxia (GM): what even are bird' dreamself?
Arxon: (We could all be dreaming buddies!)
(.....Well, Leon)
Wiwaxia (GM): we just don't know
Karrin Blue: Myrtha's has a cute floating tutu
Wiwaxia (GM): (player/character conflation for sake of joke)
(Not) Literally A Bird: (i gotta say wi, finding out that leon's tower was straight-up broken was seriously cool)
Wiwaxia (GM): :D
Ilmatar Nordwind: (i still wonder what's up with that! whimsy does, i mean. ilma doesnt know.)
Karrin Blue: romantic style basically
Moss Kaplan: ((oh also i apparently have to go shopping in an hour just fyi))
Wiwaxia (GM): K!
i guess that means sticking with ilmatar and moss for that hour and then switching
probably to leon
Moss Kaplan: kk cool
Ilmatar Nordwind: Speaking of adventure! You're awake here, and I'm awake here, and we both don't really know what this place is, why don't we go try and find out?
Moss Kaplan: Well
I mean, I know a few people here.
I'm not completely clueless about this place
Ilmatar Nordwind: Oh! Ohhh! What kinda people?
Ilmatar Nordwind sounds very excited.
Wiwaxia (GM): (the eclipse has passed at this point, btw)
Moss Kaplan: Well, there's always TS.
And it looks like the eclipse is over, so you- so we can leave now
Ilmatar Nordwind hovers into a sorta standing position, and tries to switch the floating thing off.
Ilmatar Nordwind: TS?
Moss Kaplan: Taciturn Shopkeep
I mean, no judge, up tp you
Uh, are you planning to float the whole way there?
Ilmatar Nordwind tilts her head.
Ilmatar Nordwind: (wi, can i switch the floating thing off at will?)
Wiwaxia (GM): not really
it kinda stops when you are touching the ground, though
Ilmatar Nordwind: (dang)
(i wanted to do the "race you to the streets?" thing and just drop down because falling, hooray)
Wiwaxia (GM): no, but you could just fly downward
Ilmatar Nordwind: (but thats boring)
Karrin Blue: then you'd add your speed to gravity
Ilmatar Nordwind: "Is TS far away?"
Wiwaxia (GM): what gravity?
Ilmatar Nordwind: (the gravity everyone else ilmatar hasnt encountered yet seems to experience?)
Wiwaxia (GM): (gravity on prospit and derse is even wonkier than on the Lands)
Moss Kaplan: -shrugging- not too far.
(gravity is like, a lifestyle choice)
Ilmatar Nordwind: ((fuck it, full on what is focus, ilma can get the idea to check how high she can go and to get an overview later))
Then what are we waiting for?
Moss Kaplan: Uh. Nothing, I guess. Let's go.
(annnnnnd through the window to TS' house we go)
Ilmatar Nordwind: Wheee!
Wiwaxia (GM): pchoooo
TS's house is right above her shop, most of the way around the moon
so ilmatar gets a pretty good veiw of the prospit system as you fly past
Moss Kaplan: (Cool.)
Wiwaxia (GM): you see the planet of prospit proper come into view behind the bulk of the moon
and behind, far, far in the distance, a small iridescent sphere and a line of blue lights
Ilmatar Nordwind wonders what those are!
are you coming to visit?
:D
(I think my portals are the blue ones at least)
Moss Kaplan: (oh, really? cool)
Ilmatar Nordwind: (i thought those were the prototyping towers i was seeing)
Karrin Blue: well a shiny sphere and a line of lights
sounds to me like a Land planet with a line of portals!
Wiwaxia (GM): yep, karrin's got it
the prototyping towers are hidden by the bulk of Prospit and the moon from where you are
Moss Kaplan: (very cool, so like
we could just visit
whenever)
like
Karrin Blue: well
it's a pretty far flight
also
your fleshbodies are still on your Lands
it's just your dreamselves
Wiwaxia (GM): also, if you wake up, your dreamself goes poof back to your dream room
Ilmatar Nordwind: (i wanna know what happens when dreamself and meatself touch)
Moss Kaplan: (no visit all the time
erry day)
Wiwaxia (GM): I need to figure out the exact distances from prospit to the planets, don't I
Moss Kaplan: (haha probably)
(but now we are visiting TS!)
Ilmatar Nordwind: (ilma at the very least has a serious case of adhd, you might need to remind her)
(and, wi, yes, yes you do.)
Ilmatar Nordwind flies farther upwards.
Moss Kaplan: TS' place is over there
-pointing-
Karrin Blue: btw, we're all under obligation to, if another pc dies, to drag their corpse to a questbed right
Wiwaxia (GM): well, most of you don't know about quest beds
(Not) Literally A Bird: ...does leon?
Wiwaxia (GM): hmmm, lemme think about that for a bit
the sprites all know, of course, but they are not known for helpfully volunteering information
Karrin Blue: well once one of us gets shown some stabs the prospitans could be retconned to seeing their body on a quest bed
dersites are a bit out of luck there unless the unknowable gods decide to let them know
Ilmatar Nordwind: ((we kinda only need one seed of happening tho))
Karrin Blue: yeah
Wiwaxia (GM): sorry, can't parse that, whimsy
Ilmatar Nordwind: Huh, oh, yeah. I was just wondering how far up I could go.
((well, we only need one person seeing someone lying on a questbed, then that person can tell everybode else))
Wiwaxia (GM): ((ah, gotcha))
Ilmatar Nordwind: ((and the prospit dreamers can get visions from the derse dreamers, too, so))
Wiwaxia (GM): ((for the record, i'm not doing retconning of cloud visions, except as initiated by Moss for his Space thing, which probably wouldn't apply to quest beds. Other than that, all the cloud visions are randomly generated))
((this is the game of a hundred guides, though))
Karrin Blue: akay
(Not) Literally A Bird: ((yo i'm gonna go afk for ~10 mins which really shouldn't make a difference for y'all but i thought i'd let you know))
Wiwaxia (GM): ((I can think of at least five ways you could find out about quest beds))
((not including just straight-up stumbling across one))
Ilmatar Nordwind: ((whimsy knows about the existence of a library on prospit. guess what ilma will do once she gets there))
Wiwaxia (GM): so, which way is ilmatar going "up"?
with reference to Skaia, probably
Moss Kaplan: ((usually the way my groups find out about resurrection options in a game is if i die.
....i am trying to be less reckless these days))
Arxon: ((...So it'll be when Lemi dies
the second time)

Karrin Blue has expected to die at least twice so far
Ilmatar Nordwind: ((the direction of ilmatar going up is, perpendicular away from prospit)) ((but when moss called her she flew down again))
Wiwaxia (GM): ((you can also act against death by trying to ensure that any timeline in which you permadie is doomed))
((by establishing future knowledge of yourself or stable time loops))
((risky though. ties down your options on what the future can be))
also that doesn't work for Leon, duh
sorry, back off of death disgression
ilmatar, moss reigned you in to go get to TS, yeah?
Moss Kaplan: (yes i think)
Ilmatar Nordwind: (ayup)
Wiwaxia (GM): you make it the rest of the way there uneventfully, despite ilmatar constantly darting off after inviting archways and towers and plazas and
Moss Kaplan: (haha)
Wiwaxia (GM): as you fly, you see the city slowly start to fill back up with people returning from their eclipsetime breaks
TS is setting up to get back to work as you arrive
Moss Kaplan: Hey TS
Ilmatar Nordwind: Hello, hello!
TS: hey, kiddo
Moss Kaplan: How was your eclipse break?
TS nods noncomittally
TS jerks her head in the direction of Ilmatar
TS: friend of yours?
Moss Kaplan: Yeah. From online. Kind of.
TS sticks out a hand, somewhat gruffly
TS: pleasure
Ilmatar Nordwind smiles and shakes the offered hand.
Ilmatar Nordwind: Likewise! My name's Ilmatar.
Wiwaxia (GM): your hand only gets a little crushed
TS: Taciturn Shoemaker
Wiwaxia (GM): the door rings and a carapacian lady walks in
TS: a moment, you two
TS appears to conduct an entire business deal with some nodding, some noncommittal grunting and a few single words
Moss Kaplan: ((oops, like 10 minutes left for me))
Wiwaxia (GM): ((K))
TS turns back to you
TS: tea?
Ilmatar Nordwind: ((kk))
Moss Kaplan: sure! thanks
Ilmatar Nordwind: That'd be nice, thank you!
TS nods, and puts a pot on, then gets back to setting up her workbench
Wiwaxia (GM): you can't help but notice that her leather is almost entirely gold and white
Moss Kaplan: Hey that looks very nice
Ilmatar Nordwind is looking around with big eyes.
TS: mm
(Not) Literally A Bird: (i am no longer afk. i know y'all missed me.)
Moss Kaplan: (we missed you horrifically)
Wiwaxia (GM): (also, we're probably gonna switch to you momentarily when moss has to leave)
Moss Kaplan: (in like 4 minutes)
(i wish i had real tea right now, mine is cold)
Wiwaxia (GM): (oh no!)
(Not) Literally A Bird: (i figured :P)
(ohh no!!! that is the worst)
Ilmatar Nordwind: depends on the tea tbh)
(Not) Literally A Bird: (well yes, i am assuming it is not iced tea :P)
Moss Kaplan: (ice tea is gross. fite me
and i'm leaving on that note, apparently)
Wiwaxia (GM): (To GM) rolling 2d6
(
5
+
6
)
= 11
Ilmatar Nordwind: (kk, see you )
Moss Kaplan: (sweet talk to yall later, have fun)
Wiwaxia (GM): later!
(Not) Literally A Bird: (see ya!)
Arxon: (bye!)
(Not) Literally A Bird: ===> Leon: Resume not-drowning
Wiwaxia (GM): alright
let's see
last we definitively knew your position you were "wedged in a ceiling" in the middle of a half-hour long conversation with lemi
(Not) Literally A Bird: yep
Leon Gaspar: er, that is to say, yep
Wiwaxia (GM): you should probably try to get out of the water at some point in there, because hypothermia will start to be a concern
Leon Gaspar: also yep
can i wriggle upwards?
Wiwaxia (GM): hmm, lemme check the logs from last time
one moment
you got your head through some shoddy ceiling tiles
and you can get your hands up where there's air
but there's actual structural stuff that's too narrow to get your shoulders through
Leon Gaspar: yeah, figured
alright, lemme think
did i check the door already?
Wiwaxia (GM): also, your head isn't poking through to the next floor, you're in the airspace (fortunately literally) between ceiling and the next floor
door is unlocked but rusted shut
Leon Gaspar: oh yeah
Wiwaxia (GM): well, rusted ajar, really
Leon Gaspar: i can work with ajar
gonna wriggle back down into the water
what sort of chairs are in the room? swively ones or regular ones?
Wiwaxia (GM): rusty, algae covered, falling apart ones, mostly
Leon Gaspar: yes but what are their legs like
i want a chair leg, is what i'm saying
or a table leg, not fussy
Wiwaxia (GM): 1d2 for if chairs are rolley or not 1 is yes
rolling 1d2
(
1
)
= 1
Leon Gaspar: rolling 1d2
(
1
)
= 1
pfft well that settles that
Wiwaxia (GM): so that's a resounding yes
Leon Gaspar: that is less useful
Wiwaxia (GM): there are the tables with the rows of monitors on them, though
Leon Gaspar: also true
i am going to try and rip off a table-leg
Wiwaxia (GM): str check, roll twice and take the lowest
(b/c hard to do shit underwater)
Leon Gaspar: is that 1d20 plus my strength or just 1d20?
Wiwaxia (GM): the first one
Leon Gaspar: rolling 1d20 + 11
(
15
)+11
= 26
rolling 1d20 + 11
(
7
)+11
= 18
Wiwaxia (GM): 18 is a near failure
you think you might've loosened it a bit
starting to feel a bit short on air. also, your phone is blinking at you with new messages from inside your sylladex
Leon Gaspar: ooh! okay one more thing, are the chairs covered in fabric that i could grab?
Wiwaxia (GM): yep
it's all torn and hanging around in tatters
and grown over with algae
Leon Gaspar: i only need enough to cover my hands
i attempt to grab two roughly fist-sized bits of fabric
Wiwaxia (GM): done
Leon Gaspar: nice
alright, back out the window from whence i came!
Wiwaxia (GM): sweet, sweet air!
also you probably have a few more lines of that conversation we already saw here
Leon Gaspar: yep! i briefly talk to lemi
now, about that glass-shard-filled window
about how many remaining shards of glass are there?
Wiwaxia (GM): uh, filled
as in, there's larger or smaller shards more or less all the way around the perimeter
let's say 8 big ones
Leon Gaspar: alright. i wrap my right hand firmly in gross algae cloth and attempt to yank out one of the bigger ones, one from the bottom edge
Wiwaxia (GM): hmm
lemme think about how to model this for a sec
speaking as someone who has pried broken glass shards from putty around the edge of a window
:V
Leon Gaspar: ((i'm so sorry))
((:P)
Wiwaxia (GM): protip: if you're gonna run around swinging sticks, keep a good grip on them
Leon Gaspar: ((solid advice!))
Wiwaxia (GM): especially when your sibling is still asleep, in the room right nearby, and your old house only has single-glazed windows
:B
Leon Gaspar: ((pfft, that sounds like a fun adventure))
Wiwaxia (GM): on consideration, it's probably not anything you need to make a roll for, so just roll for time and number of scrapes
scrapes= -2
so none
and time
are you clearing the whole window or just the big pieces?
also, you're chatting on-and-off with lemi this whole time, as per preestablished timeline of that convo
Leon Gaspar: everything off the bottom edge, then the big pieces from around the whole thing
Wiwaxia (GM): big peices = 8 minutes
bottom edge= 13 minutes
Leon Gaspar: not tooo bad. bit cold though.
Wiwaxia (GM): yep
can I get a fort save versus onset of hypothermia?
Leon Gaspar: remind me what to roll for that?
Wiwaxia (GM): 1d20, you want low
Leon Gaspar: rolling 1d20
(
11
)
= 11
blech, failed
Wiwaxia (GM): you're shivering by the time you're done, and your fingers are starting to get a bit numb
Leon Gaspar: leon is weak adn will not survive the window
uh
Wiwaxia (GM): pffft
Leon Gaspar: that was meant to be winter but i'll roll w/ it :P
okay! time to try actually getting out of the water
leon's gonna crawl through the window as carefully as possible
Wiwaxia (GM): alright, let's say dex check, with degree of success determining how much damage you take
but you obviously get through the window one way or another
Leon Gaspar: do i include the +1?
Wiwaxia (GM): nope
Leon Gaspar: rolling 1d20 + 13
(
10
)+13
= 23
Wiwaxia (GM): ((that's not part of your dex score proper, that's a note about what the modification to your defense from exceptional dex is))
and that's a narrow success so you take 1 damage
Leon Gaspar: i...am not on my own map
but that puts me at -1 i'm pretty sure
Wiwaxia (GM): oh no, you are not, whoops
Leon Gaspar: yep! time for some death and dismemberment
Wiwaxia (GM): 1: ow. that hurt.
you've got a long, painful scrape down one side
worth 20xp, tho
Leon Gaspar: leon levels up entirely by smacking himself on sharp things
alright! i'm in the room! time to look around
Wiwaxia (GM): hey, that's where like 50% of lemi's experience has come from
rolling 1t[THE-ADVENTURE-DIE-OF-ADVENTURE!!(and/or-misery)]
(
1 Encounter
)
= 1
rolling 1d6
(
6
)
= 6
whoops, I meant
rolling 1t[okay-but-what-KIND-of-encounter]
(
6
)
= 6
uh
Wiwaxia (GM): okay
Leon Gaspar: the dice are very decisive today
Wiwaxia (GM): holy shit
i was not expecting that yet
Arxon: (Wow Lemi has gotten 50% of her experience from NOT being injured horribly?)
Wiwaxia (GM): can I get a moment to prep?
Leon Gaspar: er, yes
if i can put that line in the book of 'things you never want to hear your GM say'
Wiwaxia (GM): go ahead!
Ilmatar Nordwind: (im falling asleep in front of the tablet, ima go to sleep now k)
Leon Gaspar: (night!)
Wiwaxia (GM): wait, i would really recommend you stay up a bit longer
the dice have just thrown up a Major Thing
whimsy: ok, ill try
Wiwaxia (GM): those double sixes were Important
whimsy: ifi dont respond assume ive failed but the tabletis stillon
Arxon: (oh no....)
(Not) Literally A Bird: (both anxious and also rly excited)

 

Spoiler: a new character appears! and then bird and i conspire to be dicks so we switch to myrtha for a bit

cloudedInterrex [cI] began bugging nascentInterlude[nI]
(Not) Literally A Bird: NI: huh?
whimsy: (am i smelling aliens)
(Not) Literally A Bird: Leon checks his phone. That was definitely an alert, but...
Wiwaxia (GM): (sorry, better make that cloudedLychnobite, got l and I confused on my periodic symbols)
(Not) Literally A Bird: (he's also lying on the floor of the room he's in bc he's exhausted, if anyone's curious)
cL: hello?
(Not) Literally A Bird: NI: uh, hello
cL: oh
oh my god
Leon Gaspar: (that is to say)
cL: you're actually there, right
Leon Gaspar: NI: i...yes, i am
cL: there's actually someone else typing on the other end of this thing
Leon Gaspar: NI: how did you get this chumhandle?
NI: i didn't even think anyone was still...well, there
cL: i
oh my goodness
i thought there wan't anyone else left
well, except for my friends, i guess
i've tried so many of these old handles
but there's never any respons
Leon Gaspar: NI: your friends? there are other people still out there?
NI: where are you, anyway?
cL: there's five of us
we're in the Furthest Ring
do you know where that is?
haha "where"
there's no fucking where out here
Leon Gaspar: (good question. do i know aobut the furthest ring? aside from that my walkthrough is probably hosted there)
Karrin Blue: Myrtha is probably having weird voidy dreams but other than that
Leon Gaspar: NI: caaan't say it rings a bell, no
NI: wait shit i haven't even asked your name
cL: oh
Leon Gaspar: NI: i'm leon
cL: hi
Wiwaxia (GM): ((fuck fuck fuck gimme a moment))
Leon Gaspar: (:3)
Wiwaxia (GM): ((you ass))
Leon Gaspar: (i assume leon does not in fact know aobut the furthest ring)
(i'm sorry!)
(...well, i do have an out for you)
Wiwaxia (GM): ((no worries))
Leon Gaspar: (altho it's kind of a dick move for all involved)
(my mum wants me to go grab lunch w/ her)
(so we can suspend leon there, move to someone else, and i can come back later)
Wiwaxia (GM): :D
i am enough of a dick to do that if you want to
Leon Gaspar: dick high-five er, not like that, though
Wiwaxia (GM): ppppppft
Arxon: ( :< cliiiifffhaaangers!)
(jk this is amazing)
Leon Gaspar: anyway! alrighty, i'll go afk for a bit and hopefully catch you all before the session ends! tune in next time for 'leon talks to probable aliens!'
Wiwaxia (GM): yep!
whimsy, if you haven't fallen asleep at the computer, now is probably a good time to go fall over into bed
aren't you glad you stayed up for that, though?
:3
whimsy: im already in bed, wifi and a portable device ftw
Wiwaxia (GM): fair enough!
whimsy: ni
Wiwaxia (GM): night!
whimsy: *
n8
Arxon: night!
Wiwaxia (GM): alright, I think I can go for about another hour
which of you want's to go?
Arxon: (I am fine w/ whatever!
I am never gonna say no to Lemi ventures but. I feel like I have been taking up lots of time so)
Wiwaxia (GM): karrin?
Karrin Blue: ?
I'd like to go!

Myrtha Oscurr took a nap, last time, i think
Myrtha Oscurr: so hp regen?
Wiwaxia (GM): yep!
how long are you sleeping?
Myrtha Oscurr: hmm
it's a catnap
Wiwaxia (GM): you did not wake up on derse, alas, or I could run you both
do you want timeframe?
Myrtha Oscurr: sure
there was a beadstorm last time wasn't there
Wiwaxia (GM): yep, beadstorm outside
Myrtha Oscurr: so maybe "slept until the storm started dying down"?
Wiwaxia (GM): you're coming up for t=21:00 when you're going to sleep
which is about when lemi also went to sleep
you two are the farthest along of anyone on the timeline except waking!ilmatar at t=24:00
still wanna go with until storm dies down?
Myrtha Oscurr: well basically the idea there is
want to see the sirens off
and they're staying till then
sooo
Wiwaxia (GM): fair enough
time to roll a buncha spindown durations
rolling 1d10
(
2
)
= 2
rolling 1d9
(
7
)
= 7
rolling 1d8
(
6
)
= 6
rolling 1d7
(
6
)
= 6
Wiwaxia (GM): rolling 1d6
(
2
)
= 2
rolling 1d5
(
1
)
= 1
and that's over
so 6*10 minutes
Myrtha Oscurr: ok
Wiwaxia (GM): you sleep for an hour
which gets you 1d6+1 hp
Myrtha Oscurr: rolling 1d6+1
(
5
)+1
= 6
eh
not bad
Wiwaxia (GM): (did you add that already? I didn't see)
Myrtha Oscurr: I just did
Wiwaxia (GM): k!
Myrtha Oscurr: so now Myrtha has a bit over 1/3 of her hp back
Wiwaxia (GM): yep!
(reading logs, one moment)
you come downstairs as the sirens are making preparations to leave
the sirens bow in your direction
siren: the storm has abated, Lady, so we will take our leave
Myrtha Oscurr: "I see. Well, please let me see you off, then."
the sirens bow again in assent
the sirens politely fall in behind you

Myrtha Oscurr was meaning to see where they entered from ><
Wiwaxia (GM): politeness is a terrible thing, is it not?
Myrtha Oscurr: yes
well
ok i think that they said that the underground tunnels were where they came from
so i guess I'll head over to the hole in the ground that i fell into
or
that was the only entrance i found?
Wiwaxia (GM): sorry, can't parse that last question
Myrtha Oscurr: was the entrance i fell into
before
the only entrance to the tunnels i have discovered
Wiwaxia (GM): yep
Myrtha Oscurr: well i guess i will head to that entrance and try to not fall in
iirc there was a ladder?
Wiwaxia (GM): a short one, yeah
the drop's only like a meter
(note that you didn't even take falling damage when you stumbled into it)
Myrtha Oscurr: I will enter that way then cause it's the only way I know
Wiwaxia (GM): you make your way down to the entrance
flagcoonsprite meets you halfway down the hill and joins the procession
when you reach the entrance, the sirens bow again, thank you again, bow again and leave into the tunnels
Myrtha Oscurr: Alright then.
Wiwaxia (GM): oh! do you want to warn them about the lich before they leave
Myrtha Oscurr: SHIT YEAH
Wiwaxia (GM): I just remembered that was a thing
Myrtha Oscurr: "Oh, be careful. The last time I was down in these tunnels, a monster - a Lich, I think - was down here. '
"In that direction. Is the tunnel you came through that way?"
the assistant siren, the one who hasn't said much, looks pretty scared
other_siren: yes. Think you for the warning, Lady, we will know to take the long way back.
Wiwaxia (GM): *thank
Myrtha Oscurr: "Please, and don't hesitate to let me know if you need my help in the future."
"Be safe."
siren: we will.
the sirens bow deeply a third time and leave into the tunnels
Myrtha Oscurr: ((OK do you bychance have a map of the Underground cause i'd kinda like to check that out))
((if you don't have it prepared i'll try something else out))
((maybe see if I can get to Derse))
Wiwaxia (GM): ahahah, no not yet
Myrtha Oscurr: alright, we can do a different thing then!
Wiwaxia (GM): all i've got so far is that t on the world map you see
Myrtha Oscurr: alright
Wiwaxia (GM): well, more immediate surroundings than world
the world's a lot bigger
Myrtha Oscurr: heh yeah
hmm
...do you have a list of subplots i've stumbled on yet ><
i think the main thing would be underground exploration but if you're not prepared for that then other things should be done
Wiwaxia (GM): alright, shit you've found in no particular order:
dad's tire tracks leading "up" (on this map orientation) to a river
now lost by shifting beads
creepy voices on the wind and in your friend's chat client
squares of glass over here
the underground
Wiwaxia (GM): the weird gateway below your house
rude, unhelpful consort
respectful consorts asking after weapons
DT and your dad's wallet
deceased and recovered, respectively
FP
Wiwaxia (GM): the whisper lines, I suppose, although you have no real leads on those
and that's all i can think of
Myrtha Oscurr: ok
well
Wiwaxia (GM): oh, and the general plot to get everyone to meet up at your house
Myrtha Oscurr: I shall return to my house and check out the wallet for anything in it that might be useful or helpful
oh yeah
Wiwaxia (GM): alright!
you get 72 boonbucks
probably ill-gotten
actually better make that 720
there's a nice sword and halberd in there
your dad's favorite suit of full plate
Wiwaxia (GM): some actual earth cash, ID and credit cards
and some sort of tablet with a green diamond with the letters SN on the back
oh, and a moderately embarrassing but very sweet photo of you as a kid
Myrtha Oscurr: aww
How do the tablet, weapons, and armor compare to what I have?
well, armor is armor
also i am not dadsized
Wiwaxia (GM): sword's well balanced and good for parrying
worth a +1 def
halberd is a bit longer than what you've got
and will let you hit enemies an additional meter away
but neither does more than 1d8 damage or has any additional effects
Myrtha Oscurr: hmm
well we're allowed to carry more than one weapon in our specibi right
Wiwaxia (GM): yep
Myrtha Oscurr: so i'll add them to my open slots
what about the tablet?
Wiwaxia (GM): you turn it on
it gives you a lock screen

Myrtha Oscurr tries to open
Wiwaxia (GM): alright
how?
Myrtha Oscurr: well
what kind of lockscreen?
password, right?
Wiwaxia (GM): numpad
Myrtha Oscurr: one second
what was the significant number for our session...
ok
i try 616
Wiwaxia (GM): it wants four digits
Myrtha Oscurr: ><
1016?
Wiwaxia (GM): nope
Myrtha Oscurr: hrmph

Myrtha Oscurr tries to remember any significant numbers for her dad
Myrtha Oscurr: harmph
Wiwaxia (GM): there's always your birthday, but you don't know if he's that much of a sap
12/16, btw

Myrtha Oscurr tries it anyways!
Wiwaxia (GM): nope
Myrtha Oscurr: darn.
his birthday?
Wiwaxia (GM): ... you don't actually know his birthday
he always just asked for "unbirthday" presents on your birtday
so you could celebrate together
Myrtha Oscurr: aww
Wiwaxia (GM): next guess?
Myrtha Oscurr: i do not have any other ideas
though maybe i can check my house/his room for notes he left himself?
Arxon: (wait you found his id, right?)
Myrtha Oscurr: yeah
I suppose if there's a four number sequence on there i'll try that
Wiwaxia (GM): that would give you his DOB, yeah
Myrtha Oscurr: i'll try that then!
Wiwaxia (GM): 6/16/1976
Myrtha Oscurr: 1976 then?
Wiwaxia (GM): nope!
Myrtha Oscurr: 2592?
Wiwaxia (GM): the tablet helpfully informs you that you have reached the maximum number of wrong attempts and will be locked out for an unspecified length of time
Myrtha Oscurr: Xb
Well fine then.

Myrtha Oscurr transfers stuff over to her own sylladex because it's good to keep things tidy
Myrtha Oscurr: OK.
Wiwaxia (GM): i think I'm gonna wrap there for tonight, actually
Myrtha Oscurr: oh ok
Arxon: ok
Myrtha Oscurr: actually i have a bit of work to do so i should probably leave for tonight, sorry
Wiwaxia (GM): so you've got a week to try to think of things to unlock the tablet when it lets you again
Myrtha Oscurr: ok
Wiwaxia (GM): well, that works out well!
Myrtha Oscurr: oh actually
can i try and see if i can roll to get back onto Derse next session?
grace roll or w/e
Wiwaxia (GM): need to be "close to death" in once way or another to trigger the roll
Myrtha Oscurr: sleeping doesn't work?
ok
Wiwaxia (GM): well, you also need to be asleep
Myrtha Oscurr: mk
well
I think that Myrtha is still probably tired since she only got a catnap
and is still only at a third health
so maybe she'll go up to actually sleep in a real bed
and sleep for longer than an hour because oh myrtha
Wiwaxia (GM): ((btw, i'm basing this on john only waking up when jade dies, karkat only waking up as he's about to die, vriska only waking up when she gets beaten mostly to death...))
alright, sounds good!
Myrtha Oscurr: yeah
so, grace roll now or next week?
Wiwaxia (GM): next week
Myrtha Oscurr: akay
well i'll be leaving then
so it's arxon's turn?
or wait did you mean you're finishing for tonight
Wiwaxia (GM): yep, the latter
Myrtha Oscurr: ah alright
sleep well then!
Wiwaxia (GM): sorry, arxon
Arxon: night!
hey, it's fine
Wiwaxia (GM): you'll get some time next week
(Not) Literally A Bird: aww, figures i'd come back too late :P oh well, gives wi some time to come up with names for what are definitely not aliens

 

Spoiler: Lemi goes to visit the Black Queen and gets trapped in BUREAUCRACY HELL

Wiwaxia (GM): i am here
briefly
i'm gonna go get some food and then we'll start
Arxon: alright!
whimsy: morning
(Not) Literally A Bird: evening all
Arxon: midafternoon everyone
Wiwaxia (GM): "evening"
it's fucking six o clock and dark out
i hate daylight savings time
whimsy: ::D
Wiwaxia (GM): or the end of it, rather
no word from moss, yet
i'm gonna give them like another ten minutes, and then start without them
i say ten specifically because that is 6:16 my time :V
(Not) Literally A Bird: neeeeeeeeeeerd
Wiwaxia (GM): 'y don't say
(Not) Literally A Bird: :P
look im the one that vomited a stupid amount of words about a character im not even playing
Wiwaxia (GM): well i just vomited a bunch of words to my co-conspirator about a planet you will never see, so....
(Not) Literally A Bird: perhaps we shall agree that we are both, in fact, Huge Nerds
Wiwaxia (GM): yeah, maybe
just maybe
well, no sign of moss yet, so i think we'll just go ahead and start
(Not) Literally A Bird: is there anyone who's gotta leave early?
Wiwaxia (GM): honestly, i've probably gotta leave the earliest
i think arxon's the only one really free to start, though
ilmatar's doing stuff with moss right now
and moss will probably want to be here for when we continue leon's conversation with the mysterious cL
(Not) Literally A Bird: ahh true
(hehehe)
Arxon: (even more suspense)
Wiwaxia (GM): so as i recall
lemi was investigating the glowing towers above Drese proper
Arxon: right
she was debating between "maybe this queen'll know what's going on" and "yeah but the last conversation I had was super awkward and I don't want to cause any trouble"
the towers are connected to a building at the base, right?
Wiwaxia (GM): the towers are connected like that at the base
pretend there's six there, I haven't gotten the time to make proper derse and prospit pictures
which is to say that they just kind of vanish down into the tangle of building of the city
Lemi Malloy: Right
(Lemi knows, intellectually, that the planet Earth was far biggest but these still feels like the biggest lace she's ever been)
(She's kinda wondering, vaguely, if she actually died back on LOFAC and this is the wierd ass afterlife)
She looks around at the darkness around the planet, seeing if there are any other moon chains or planets nearby
Wiwaxia (GM): just the one moon chain
Lemi Malloy: Definitely not big enough for an entire afterlife, then
She looks down at the streets below,trying to find a relatively quiet spot to land
Wiwaxia (GM): "streets"
it's a bit hard to tell the streets and the buildings apart
especially at this distance
Lemi Malloy: This place is giving Lemi a headache
which she supposes is another piece of evidence for "not dead"
Wiwaxia (GM): it looks like the city is built on itself, tiers upon tiers of skywalks and bridges and arcades down into the gloom
Lemi Malloy: Well, she thinks, if I was a queen where would I put a castle in this mess
The middle, probably
She flies down
Wiwaxia (GM): you know what this calls for?
Lemi Malloy: ???
Wiwaxia (GM): http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=6&p=003568
(well, the "descending into derse" bit, at least
Lemi Malloy: (hell yes)
Wiwaxia (GM): you descend through twisted streets, past shadowed eaves and stories upon stories of amethyst brick
you fly through the buttresses of cathedrals and between the pointed tower tops
"into the vast and lightless gloom..."
"down to the depths she went, alone"
-President, revolutionary and renowned fantasist George Washington
at last you hit what must pass for the "ground" here
Wiwaxia (GM): above you, you cannot even see the dark sky, only buildings upon buildings
you skim through streets until you reach what is unmistakably a place
purple banners blazoned sable hang from every crenelation
a wide pathway leads across a deserted plaza to an imposing and well-guarded gate
Lemi Malloy: Lemi did not anticipate guards
How many are there?
Wiwaxia (GM): too many to eyeball the number
Lemi Malloy: Lemi hides behind a pillar as she debates her next course of action
If what the potter says is true, then the queen would be interested in her, right? So if she went up and said "um hi I'm one of the princess????" they should at least take notice
On the other hand she doesn't trust her social graces to last her through one sentence without fucking up somehow
She kinda wishes she could ask someone for help, but she's already annoying enough to her friends, probably
.....plus she doesn't even have her computer, she's pretty sure
Do any of the guards look nice?
Wiwaxia (GM): you can't tell
you're at the far end of the plaza from them
Lemi Malloy: How tall does the palace look?
Wiwaxia (GM): hm
(gonna see if there's a ref for it, althoug I don't think there is. brb)
yeah, nope
it's three or four stories high
and there's a gap about that tall in the buildings above it
hell, you can even see some of the black sky above from here
Lemi Malloy: Alright, so, options:
Have a simple conversation that is at least 30% likely to go her way
OR fly up and try to sneak into the castle that way, a maneuver that is almost sure to get her killed by all the guards
Hard choice
She nervously steps out into the plaza
Wiwaxia (GM): nothing happens
the plaza looks pretty deserted
just you and the guards, on opposite ends
Lemi Malloy: She slowly walks across the plaza
Wiwaxia (GM): nothing continues to happen
this probably does not help your nerves, all things considered
the guards remain at attention at their posts
Lemi Malloy: She stops about ten feet away from them, trying to find the nicest looking one
guard: State your name and business.
Lemi Malloy: "Ah, I am, um, Lemi Malloy, and I woke up in one of the towers on the, um, chain moon? And a potter told me that the- the, um, the queen...nevermind, I should leave.."
Wiwaxia (GM): the guard blinks for a moment
Lemi Malloy: Lemi starts to nervously back away
guard: You want an audience with the Queen? Please follow me, Princess.
Lemi Malloy: "Ah, right, yes!"
She follows him, still looking nervous
Wiwaxia (GM): he leads you through a number of high-ceilinged hallways that you can't tell apart
then stops at a small out-of-the-way room
guard: Right here, your Highness
The queen is busy with affairs of state, but the attendant here will set up a time for an audience
Lemi Malloy: "Of course, uh, thank you very much."
Quiet Attendant: inside is a small desk with a small, bookish woman bent over it
there's a chair opposite the desk, wedged between stacks of paper as tall as you
there's a window in the wall
it seems to look out from the second story of some vast, grand room, with two long red carpets crossing in the middle of the purple floor
the guard quietly shuts the door behind you
Quiet Attendant does not look up

Lemi Malloy waits quietly for a few minutes, not wanting to disturb her work
Quiet Attendant continues to not look up

Lemi Malloy finally coughs quietly
Quiet Attendant: ah!
um, excuse me
I haven't kept you waiting, I hop?
*hope
Lemi Malloy: "Not too long! I, um, I am supposed to- wait, I want to- um, audience with the queen- because I'm a princess? I think?"
Quiet Attendant pushes up her glasses, which are on an honest-to-goodness librarian chain, despite having no nose that you can see
Quiet Attendant: ah yes
hm hm
So you've woken up, then?
yes yes, the Queen will want to see you at her earliest convenience, I'm sure
Quiet Attendant spins around in her chair and starts shuffling through yet another stack of papers
Quiet Attendant: given your position, Your Highness, and the relative speediness with which I'm sure you desire to meet our glorious Queen
and vice versa, I'm certain
i think we can be excused if we skip the Intent to register for an appointment to request a Royal Audience form, and Request for a Royal Audience forms one through four

Lemi Malloy nods without having any idea what's going on
Quiet Attendant pushes a piece of paper across the desk
Quiet Attendant: sign here, please
this is to vouch that you are, in fact, a Princess of the Moon
although it's mostly a formality, our Agents are familiar with you already
Lemi Malloy: "Ah, right, of course? Just my name?"
Quiet Attendant: yes, yes
print in the blanks, and then sign on the marked line at the bottom
Lemi Malloy: "...In cursive?:
*"
Quiet Attendant: yes, please
now let me see...
Quiet Attendant spins back around and starts shuffling through papers again

Lemi Malloy signs her name, which is fairly impressive given she never actually learned how to write in cursive and has just seen pictures
Quiet Attendant: i'll just fill out this Request for information on the Queen's schedule form for you, and get that sent along upstairs
and then, hmm
i'll fill out this Request for forms to schedule a requested audience for the Queen form
can you wait right here while I fill those out and take them to go get the scheduling forms?
Lemi Malloy: "Yes, of course, thank you...."
Quiet Attendant is already writing busily and doesn't seem to notice that you said anything

Lemi Malloy sits there quietly, wondering if she made a mistake
Wiwaxia (GM): after what you guess is about ten minutes, QA wordlessly gets up and goes out the door, shutting it slowly behind her so it doesn't even make a click
you notice that she's wearing heels, but you don't hear them clicking either
Lemi Malloy: Lemi sits there, trying not to get curious and look at all the paperwork
Wiwaxia (GM): you wait
QA still hasn't returned
gonna give in to temptation and look around, or sit tight
*?
Lemi Malloy: ...She compromises by just looking at the stuff she can see from her chair
Wiwaxia (GM): there's a lot of forms, and forms to request other forms and forms to request permission to fill out forms to request other forms
despite the massive clutter of paper, all the piles are stacked with the edges of each sheet perfectly aligned, and parallel to the walls of the room
you are pretty sure that if you measured out the distance from the inkwell to the edge of her desk it would not only be a whole-number of units away, it would be probably some exact fraction of the width and length of the desk away from the edge, and probably in the golden ratio or some shit besides
you notice that the window has a small black cord attached to the far side of the frame
it runs down the wall and disappears between impeccably aligned stacks of paper
Lemi Malloy: Well hm
Are there are shades on the window that the cord could be attached to?
Wiwaxia (GM): nope
just a plain window with six panes of glass
doesn't look like it even opens
Lemi Malloy: What type of cord is it? Like the type you pull?
Wiwaxia (GM): can't see from where you're sitting
just looks thin and black
and you can't really see how it attatches
Lemi Malloy: ...Well, Lemi thinks, if she really wasn't supposed to touch anything, the Quiet Attendant would have said so
She stands up and walks to the window
Wiwaxia (GM): ..... yyyyyeah that's a power cord
Lemi Malloy: Why does a window need a power cord, Lemi thinks
Are there lights on it?
Wiwaxia (GM): nope
Lemi Malloy: She gives it a look-over, confirming that it doesn't seem like it can open
Wiwaxia (GM): nope, can't open
you see someone walking down the red carpet in the room below
Lemi Malloy: DO they look important?
Wiwaxia (GM): (To GM) rolling 1d6
(
6
)
= 6
Wiwaxia (GM): (To GM) rolling 1d20+13
(
2
)+13
= 15
Wiwaxia (GM): nope
from this vantage point you can see a checkerboard throne at the place where the two carpets intersect
there's noone on it right now
(To GM) rolling 1d6
(
4
)
= 4
Lemi Malloy: Lemi stands on her tip toes to try and get a better view of the room, see if there is anyone else in it
Wiwaxia (GM): some guards standing around the edges
the person walking down the carpet stops right before the empty throne, gives it a little half-bow, then turns a quarter turn smartly and walks away down one of the other carpets
Lemi Malloy: What do they look like, other than unimportant?
Wiwaxia (GM): can I get a grace check (w/ your dreamself's 13 grace)
to see detail at this distance
Lemi Malloy: rolling 1d20+13
(
19
)+13
= 32
Wiwaxia (GM): they look like QA, is what they look like
Lemi Malloy: (oh man thanks for the good rolls in the seeing things department, dice)
Lemi eeps and carefully rushes back to her seat
Wiwaxia (GM): gonna just sit there until QA comes back?
you wait a while and she still hasn't returned
(To GM) rolling 1d6
(
4
)
= 4
Lemi Malloy: Lemi tries her best, but eventually stands back up and looks for other things in the room to investigate
Wiwaxia (GM): well, there's some drawers on the desk
the other end of that power cord attached to the window frame for no apparent reason
QA's chair
QA's... backup glasses? on her desk
more stacks of paper
Lemi Malloy: Yeah window is still the most interesting thing
Lemi wonders what would happen if she just...sorta...pulled out the power cord
......She checks to make sure there are no footsteps
Wiwaxia (GM): grace check to listen?
Lemi Malloy: rolling 1d20+13
(
8
)+13
= 21
Wiwaxia (GM): you hear a set of footsteps and freeze, then relax as it continues past the door
(To GM) rolling 1d6
(
4
)
= 4
Wiwaxia (GM): pull out the cord?
Lemi Malloy: yes
Wiwaxia (GM): the window instantly goes black
She hastily plugs it back in
Wiwaxia (GM): ... how hatily?
the outlet is between two huge stacks of paper
(To GM) rolling 1d6
(
3
)
= 3
Lemi Malloy: crap ok
then very carefully plug it back in while touching the paper as little as possible
More priority to not-paper-disturbing then plugging in if at all possible
Wiwaxia (GM): (To GM) rolling 1d6
(
4
)
= 4
Wiwaxia (GM): it takes a couple nerve-wracking minutes, but you get it in without disturbing the piles at all
the window lights back up, showing the room below again
Lemi Malloy: Success!
Now to return to home chair and hopefully successfully fight against the forces of curiosity
....
....So does the window look like it could be a screen, connected to a camera or something?
Wiwaxia (GM): could be a screen, yeah, but that would raise the question of why some humble attendant has a screen in her office hooked up to a camera overlooking the throne room
you didn't see any sort of pixelation or backlight when you were looking at it up close, and the window is set right into the wall
but it could be a really good screen installed into the wall
Lemi Malloy: Maybe she needs to see the screen paperwork reasons?
Or maybe it's, like, magic
Magic powered by a wall socket
Wiwaxia (GM): (To GM) rolling 1d6
(
4
)
= 4
Wiwaxia (GM): still no sign of QA
Lemi Malloy: is there a computer in her office?
Wiwaxia (GM): nope, unless she's got a laptop locked up in one of her desk drawers
Lemi Malloy: Can she open the drawers or are they actually locked?
Wiwaxia (GM): they've got locks on them, but Lemi didn't try them
Lemi Malloy: She listens again for footsteps while trying not to be annoyed at how long QA is taking
Wiwaxia (GM): (To GM) rolling 1d6
(
4
)
= 4
Wiwaxia (GM): k, grace check again?
Lemi Malloy: rolling 1d20+13
(
1
)+13
= 14
Wiwaxia (GM): uh
hm
yeah, you hear footsteps
lots of them
Lemi Malloy: Lemi rushes back to her seat
Wiwaxia (GM): can I get a dex check to not topple a pile of papers?
Lemi Malloy: rolling 1d20
(
5
)
= 5
oh wait did that wrong
rolling 1d20+12
(
3
)+12
= 15
Wiwaxia (GM): you bump one with your shoulder
it tiiiiiiips and skews, but doesn't topple
Lemi Malloy: Lemi sighs in relief and then sits back down
Wiwaxia (GM): it is noticeably jostled, though
(To GM) rolling 1d6
(
5
)
= 5
Lemi Malloy: .....Lemi tries to carefully just
Align all the papers again
Wiwaxia (GM): another dex check?
dex check +5, actually
Lemi Malloy: rolling 1d20+12+5
(
17
)+12+5
= 34
that right?
Wiwaxia (GM): yep
you get everything lined back up perfectly
(To GM) rolling 1d6
(
4
)
= 4
Wiwaxia (GM): you're honestly kinda impressed with yourself
Lemi Malloy: Lemi very nearly does a little victory dance, then realizes that would be a bad idea
She sits back down and resolutely waits for QA
Wiwaxia (GM): (To GM) rolling 1d6
(
5
)
= 5
Wiwaxia (GM): hum te tum
still no sign
(To GM) rolling 1d5
(
2
)
= 2
Lemi Malloy: In order to amuse herself Lemi taps out the melodies to many famous songs on her knees
Wiwaxia (GM): (seriously, i'm as surprised as you are, i've been rolling secret "when does QA show up?" rolls this whole time)
(To GM) rolling 1d4
(
4
)
= 4
Lemi Malloy: (Lemi's working theory: She and the Black Queen are in a secret relationship and they are currently having a rendezvous. This is why she has that screen in her office)
Wiwaxia (GM): well, if they are having a tryst, they're certainly taking their sweet time with eachother
no sign of QA
still
Lemi Malloy: Lemi wonders if she can just go to sleep, or if she would wake up somewhere else weird
She really wishes she had her computer so she could ask her coplayers what the hell is going on
or maybe just talk to them at all
Wiwaxia (GM): (To GM) rolling 1d3
(
2
)
= 2
Wiwaxia (GM): you sit through another good long nothing happening
you can't hear any footsteps outside
or anything other than the sound of your own breathing and heart, honestly
Lemi Malloy: Maybe QA has been assassinated since she left
Or maybe the queen has
Maybe that is why it's taking so looooong
Wiwaxia (GM): keep waiting?
(To GM) rolling 1d2
(
1
)
= 1
Lemi Malloy: Yes, but sulkily
Quiet Attendant: ah, good news
the Queen would like to see you urgently enough that I was allowed to expedite the process significantly

Lemi Malloy sits up immediately and tries to look not annoyed
Lemi Malloy: "Great, um, thank you!"
Wiwaxia (GM): you didn't even hear her open the door
k m.: ((HI I'M WITH WIFI I'LL JUST CATCH UP REAL QUICK))
Arxon: ((DON'T BOTHER IT'S LEMI BEING TRAPPED IN BUREAUCRACY))
k m.: ((WHEEEEE))
Wiwaxia (GM): well, she got some potentially interesting snooping in
Arxon: She is at least 82% convinced QA and the Queen are a Thing
k m.: ((QA and queen sittin in a tree, KISSING))
Wiwaxia (GM): i am sooooo tempted to switch to leon right now, you have no idea
but i think arxon would literally murder me
so i'm not gonna do that just yet
Arxon: On the one hand: actual things happening
on the other hand: LEMI JUST WAITED IN THAT ROOM FOR LIKE 5 HOURS
Quiet Attendant: it was really only like three
Wiwaxia (GM): whoops, that should be as wiwaxia
but QA saying it (out of character) is honestly even funnier
Arxon: She can sense Lemi's annoyance
Wiwaxia (GM): yeah, you know what
let's say that is in character
Quiet Attendant: in any case, the Queen would like to meet with you now
Right this way, your Highness

Lemi Malloy nods and stands up, being absolutely careful not to jostle the papers, and follows QA
Quiet Attendant stops for a minute just inside the door to make some unnoticable adjustments to a stack of paper next to her desk
Wiwaxia (GM): ... clarification: that's unnoticeable as in unnoticeably minute, not as in Lemi doesn't see her doing it
Lemi Malloy: Is that the stack Lemi bumped?
Wiwaxia (GM): yes
Lemi Malloy: Lemi tries not to look guilty

 

Spoiler: Lemi actually has her audience with BQ and leon actually talks to this new person

Quiet Attendant breezes past without so much as looking up at Lemi
Wiwaxia (GM): she takes off down the hall at quite an impressive clip, especially in heels
especially while still making absolutely no noise on stone floors in heels
Lemi Malloy: i assume lemi follows?
Wiwaxia (GM): wait fuck
don't mind me
(the "as" feature is dangerous when you are a gm)
Lemi Malloy: (pft)
Yes, Lemi follows

Lemi Malloy screeches like a bat and shits on QA's desk
Wiwaxia (GM): :U
THIS IS STUPID
Wiwaxia (GM): okay, enough fooling around with bullshit GM tools
where were we
Lemi following QA
you get lead through another twisting mass of corridors and up and down several sets of stairs
you never quite lose QA, but sometimes as you round a corner she's just turning the next one
she stops abruptly outside a massive ornate archway into the throne room
Wiwaxia (GM): a red carpet stretches from the gate to the, now occupied, throne
two guards flank the gate, staring straight ahead
Quiet Attendant gives a slight bow

Lemi Malloy wonders if she should bow
Quiet Attendant: This is as far as I may go, Your Highness. Go on in, the Queen is waiting for you.
Lemi Malloy: "Ah, right, thank you ma'am!"
(well this is the secret lovers theory dashed)
Lemi walks inside, trying not to look like she wants to run away
Wiwaxia (GM): trumpets blast as soon as you step through the archway

(click that, it's important)
Herald: The Princess of the Moon, Rogue of Hope, Lemi Malloy!
Lemi Malloy: (that was important thank you)
Herald: You may now approach Our Glorious, Wise and Just Monarch, Her Majesty the Black Queen of Derse!
Lemi Malloy: Lemi approaches trying to figure out where she should stop and...curtsy? You curtsy in front of queens, right? Or should she bow or should she do the thing where she gets on the ground
She really feels like she made a bad life choice
k m.: ((nice music))
Black Queen: Welcome, dear Rogue.
Long have we awaited your awakening.
Lemi Malloy: Lemi curtsies, keeping her eyes on the floor, afraid to meet the Queen's gaze
"Thank you, your majesty."
Black Queen gives a brief appreciative silence
Black Queen: You awaken on the very eve of war.
Surely this must be the will of the Gods and the Noble Circle.
Now, why did you seek audience with me, my child?
Lemi Malloy: "I. I want to know what's going on. What is this place? What do I need to do?... How can I...."
Black Queen: Ah.
Allow me to explain
This is Derse, my glorious kingdom.
And now that you have awakened, yours as well.
My husband, the Black King, goes to war with Prospit, our ancient enemies, in the heart of Skaia
Skaia is a crucible of dreams, a well of limitless creative potential
Black Queen: Prospit intends to use that power to raise a false god, a blasphemous idol
They will try to recruit Heroes, your luckless friends that slumber on their moon first, and then even you and the other Prince and Princess of our moon
all the might of Derse is bent to stop them
I have remained here to rule the planet in my husband's absence, but I fear I will soon be required for the war efforts as well
I am sorry to trouble you with such heavy matters so soon after you have awakened, my dear, but that is the world in which we now live.
Fear not, you are safe here.
Black Queen: Prospit aims its forces at Skaia
and even if they were to attempt a direct attack on Derse, they would have to cross the Medium to do so
our astronomers would see their attack with time and enough to muster the home guard or deploy troops from the factories in the Veil
still, the war will be a close one
victory of arms is assured, but all will be for naught if Prospit manages to breed its bilious idol and set it in Skaia as a seed
for that, my Princess, we must put our faith in you
Lemi Malloy: "I have to stop them from breeding this...false god?"
Black Queen: yes
The war is just beginning, though
You make take your time to rest and train here
the Royal Library is open to you, and palace guards will be sent to assist you in training of arms on your request

Lemi Malloy bows deeply
Lemi Malloy: "Thank you, your majesty."
"I...I want to learn how to become strong."
Black Queen smiles
Black Queen: Very well
Black Queen snaps her fingers and a small page boy materializes from seemingly nowhere
Black Queen: SP, run a message to Arms Master, tell him to prepare lessons for the princess at her leisure
Dear princess, I am afraid I am called away by other matters of state, but I cordially invite you to the Eclipse Ball here in the palace
I will be there, and it will be an excellent chance to meet the most powerful of Derse's citizens
you may ask an attendant for the details
Black Queen nods
Black Queen: Audience dismissed.

Lemi Malloy Curtsys again, then walks out of the room as confidently as she can
Wiwaxia (GM): see, now i'm gonna switch to leon
:D
Arxon: :D
(Not) Literally A Bird: yess
also well timed because i was getting sleepy but now im ok for a bit longer
Wiwaxia (GM): here, I'll hunt down the conversation so far and c/p it
cloudedLychnobite [cI] began bugging nascentInterlude[nI]
Wiwaxia (GM): cL: hello?
NI: uh, hello
cL: oh
oh my god
cL: you're actually there, right
NI: i...yes, i am
Wiwaxia (GM): cL: there's actually someone else typing on the other end of this thing
Leon Gaspar: NI: how did you get this chumhandle?
NI: i didn't even think anyone was still...well, there
cL: i
oh my goodness
i thought there wan't anyone else left
Wiwaxia (GM): well, except for my friends, i guess
i've tried so many of these old handles
but there's never any respons
NI: your friends? there are other people still out there?
NI: where are you, anyway?
cL: there's five of us
Wiwaxia (GM): we're in the Furthest Ring
do you know where that is?
haha "where"
there's no fucking where out here
NI: caaan't say it rings a bell, no
NI: wait shit i haven't even asked your name
Wiwaxia (GM): cL: hi
cL: oh
NI: i'm leon
end previous sessionlog
cL: ...
Terhanu
nice to meet you, Leon
Leon Gaspar: NI: hey, you too
NI: so ... are you guys playing this game thing too?
cL: were
we lost
Leon Gaspar: NI: you can lose?
NI: i mean, you can lose and not die?
cL: yes
You know the Battlefield, right?
Leon Gaspar: ((do I? how far does the walkthrough even go))
whimsy: (calling right here and now that someone from terhanus group wrote the walkthrough leon has access to)
Wiwaxia (GM): ((you do. the walkthrough doesn't go far enough to actually reach it, but it's generally one of the first things sprites mention. Onryousprite woulda given you the deets if she could talk intelligibly yet)
Leon Gaspar: NI: yeah, big chessboard thing, right?
cL: uh, yes, although that's arguably the least important thing about it
Leon Gaspar: NI: i, uh, haven't double-prototyped my sprite yet
NI: so i'm just going off this walkthrough thing
cL: walkthrough
god
damn
it
Leon Gaspar: NI: uh
NI: you okay?
cL: I'll have to tell bR you found it too
be warned, it doesn't really help with the late game
we kinda got blindsided by that
Leon Gaspar: NI: ah
whimsy: (naw shucks)
Leon Gaspar: NI: thanks for the heads-up
NI: so what happened? ... if you don't mind talking about it
NI: and also how did you not die
NI: still wrapping my head around that one
cL: i... don't really want to talk about it
Leon Gaspar: NI: fair enough
cL: but what is there to lose, i suppose
see, there's supposed to be this big endboss battle with the Black King on the battlefield after he's killed the White King
he takes the White King's scepter and uses it to summon the meteors
then you've got 24 hours to kill him and stop the meteors
there's a bunch of portals that show up around the edge of Skaia and catch all the early meteors
but they like... run out or something?
cL: point is, we were woefully underleveled and under-prepared when the meteors came
we left of fighting the Black King to the very last moment, while I tried to get all my frogs in order
but when we did go and start the fight
well, he was kicking our asses
and it was bail or die
so we bailed
cL: and the meteors destroyed the battlefield and Skaia
Leon Gaspar: Leon stares at the screen for a minute or two
NI: shit, man
NI: i'm sorry
cL: i
thanks, i suppose
Leon Gaspar: NI: yeah
cL: it was mostly my fault, i think
everyone else was so focused
and i was just fucking around
when i was supposed to be the leader
Leon Gaspar: Leon isn't sure what to say. He thinks, briefly, of Lemi.
NI: i
NI: man
cL: i was just so glad to
well
whatever
it doesn't matter know
((*now))
Leon Gaspar: NI: ...
cL: the important part is i didn't entirely doom our species to extinction
although i guess i can't really take credit for you guys making offplanet, can I?
Leon Gaspar: NI: i mean, i dunno. i'm not even sure how we managed it in the first place, whole thing's kind of a blur
NI: also hang on a minute here
Wiwaxia (GM): (pff)
Leon Gaspar: Leon starts thinking about the logistics of-- and promptly decides he really doesn't want to think about that
That way lies shipping charts
NI: er, actually, never mind
NI: so
Leon desperately casts his mind around for a topic that isn't 'you guys are in a really shitty situation and i have no idea how to get you out of it'
NI: have you guys been out there long?
cL: no idea
Leon Gaspar: LEON: (goddamnit dude)
cL: well, yes
Leon Gaspar: LEON: (why are you so bad at this)
cL: it feels like a long time
time doesn't work normal out here
nothing works normal out here
it's just an endless parade of mindfuck calamari
Leon Gaspar: NI: ,,,
LEON: (now i'm hungry)
NI: how do you even get to the furthest ring
cL: hah
run away
Leon Gaspar: NI: also i wanna ask what a mindfuck calamari is but i don't think i wanna know
cL: go far enough in any direction from skaia
your medium is like this tiny little bubble of sanity in the endless nightmare abyss
and no
you really don't
although i think bR mentioned a flamewar about them in the comments of his precious little walkthrough
Leon Gaspar: NI: i. huh. i'll check it out.
===> Leon: Stealthily check to see if anyone else is online right now
k m.: ((out to do dinner, be back in like 45ish))
Leon Gaspar: Leon takes a deeeep breath.
cL: well i was just gonna say that moss may or may not be, depending on how long they sleep
Wiwaxia (GM): shitfuck
^that was as wiwaxia
Leon Gaspar: ((shh i'll pretend i didn't see it))
leon just wants some help, man
what do you even say to someone who is trapped in a nightmare abyss with no foreseeable way out
Arxon: ?
Leon Gaspar: leon suddenly gets the urge to whistle
NI: so did you guys find the game before us?
NI: or is this some weird time shit where we started at the same time but you finished first
cL: ugh, don't talk to me about time
space is my deal
or... was supposed to be anyways
i think i wound up being pretty shit at too
doesn't matter now, anyways
Leon Gaspar: NI: i ... i guess not
cL: but yeah, tE coded it for us or something
where did you get it?
Leon Gaspar: NI: i... think one of my friends managed to get us all beta copies. now that i think about it i'm not really sure how that happened
NI: your friend works at .... uh ...
NI: what company even made sburb anyway
NI: i never checked
cL: what?
Leon Gaspar: NI: you know, they were doing a beta release. one of my friends managed to get keys even though i'm relatively certain none of us have mysterious game dev uncles
NI: it's pretty cool that your friend coded it though
cL: uh, yeah
Leon Gaspar: NI: i am getting a sinking sensation that you have no idea what i'm talking about
cL: yeah
i don't
um
Leon Gaspar: NI: so your friend coded the game .... i ... hang on
NI: now i'm really confused
cL: okay, this is gonna sound really stupid
Arxon: ((http://vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net.../Aliens.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20140727153108))
Leon Gaspar: ((here it comes))
cL: and i'm almost too embarrassed to ask it
but just indulge my paranoia for a moment here
Leon Gaspar: NI: no look that's o
*ok
NI: shoot
cL: you guys are goblins, right?
Leon Gaspar: NI: ...
NI: ... ...
cL: and not like weird aliens
or
look I know it was a dumb question
Leon Gaspar: ===> Leon: FRANTICALLY CHECK IF ILMATAR IS ONLINE
NI: no uh um
whimsy: (aahahahhahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahaha)
Leon Gaspar: NI: man
NI: i don't
NI: i
cL: okay, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked
Leon Gaspar: NI: no hang on a minute dude i'll get there
cL: it was a dumb thing to be scared of
Leon Gaspar: NI: ok look hypothetically
NI: if i was, in fact, a weird alien
cL: uh
Leon Gaspar: NI: like, on a scale of one to ten, how freaked out would you be
cL: that's not a hypothetical, is it?
Leon Gaspar: NI: i'm maintaining a steady six here but to be honest enough weird shit has happened today that i'm not even sure why this surprises me
NI: yeah no i'm
NI: a human
cL: a what
Leon Gaspar: NI: well uh i guess that word doesn't mean anything to you
NI: it's what we call ourselves
cL: i
okay
fuck
Leon Gaspar: NI: yeah
cL: i mean
i'm cool with you being an alien
you seem pretty chill
and not likely to like eat my brain or anything
i
i just
Leon Gaspar: NI: same to you dude
cL: i was just hoping it
i was hoping more goblins had made it
not just us
Leon Gaspar: NI: yeah, i
NI: i know how you feel
NI: hasn't really sunk in yet, but ...
cL: yeah, I guess so, huh
Leon Gaspar: NI: yeah
Leon quietly contemplates the ceiling and also the death of most of the human race
Also, aliens
Although 'aliens' is also a concept that doesn't really mean that much any more
cL: some eggdrop we turned out to be, huh?
uh, no offense
Leon Gaspar: NI: none taken, dude. none taken.
NI: i mean depending on how this session goes we might be seeing you soon
NI: i'm kinda glad to know that if it all goes wrong at least we can get outta dodge
cL: uh
Leon Gaspar: NI: i'm not, uh, the best fighter
cL: about that
it's really, really easy to get lost out here
at least you're in a stable timeline where you are
if possible
if shit goes wrong for you
and i know this is a lot to ask
cL: could you stay put?
so we have a fixed point of reference for you
and can try to meet up
Leon Gaspar: NI: i. i mean.
NI: shit, i'll do my best
cL: thanks
thank you
that really means a lot
i think it should be possible to use your g
er
alien communications device
Leon Gaspar: NI: i mean ... meeting up sounds pretty good to me
cL: to try to lock on to
like a polestar or something
Leon Gaspar: NI: okay, can do
cL: I'll have to talk to the others, they do all the work of flying this damn thing
i just sit around marinating in my own uselessness and failure as a leader, haha
Leon Gaspar: NI: have you got a spaceship
cL: battleship
Leon Gaspar: NI: also i really gotta introduce you to a friend of mine
NI: and then give you both a pep talk
cL: we stole it from the Derse fleet on our way out
Leon Gaspar: NI: oh, nice
NI: hey, by the way
NI: about derse
cL: yeah?
Leon Gaspar: NI: like, just out of curiousity... the walkthrough mentioned something about, like, dreaming on derse? or going there when you go to sleep?
cL: oh yeah
Leon Gaspar: NI: or the other one, the yellow one
cL: prospit, yeah
half and half
Leon Gaspar: NI: i know a couple of my friends have been hanging out there so i figure i'm probably derse, statistically speaking
NI: i just
NI: haven't dreamt there yet
cL: you have to "wake up" your "sleeping self" there
Leon Gaspar: NI: ahh
cL: who the fuck even knows
Leon Gaspar: NI: okay phew
cL: i woke up as a little kid
would have been right after
uh
well
anyways, i think that's supposed to be like a special thing for Space players?
Leon Gaspar: NI: possibly yeah
(... do i know my own aspect yet? or moss'?)
cL: you wake up on Prospit way before anyone else
Wiwaxia (GM): (no and definitely not)
Leon Gaspar: NI: huh
(do i know what a space player is, or would bR not have gotten there yet)
Wiwaxia (GM): if you know anything about it, it's just the word
Leon Gaspar: NI: i guess i'll ask around next time all my friends are awake
NI: we're doing a lot of sleeping lately
Wiwaxia (GM): classpect stuff really comes up lategame, and your walkthrough only has some half-baked hypotheses on it
Leon Gaspar: (yeah figured :P just didn't wanna go spouting off things and be totally wrong)
NI: anyway i'm glad
NI: i was starting to worry 'cause i hadn't woken up yet
NI: hey, if things, like, don't go to shit
NI: can you still use my
NI: uh
Leon Gaspar: NI: alien transmission device
NI: to get here?
cL: well, that's the plan
i don't know if it's even possible
or fast
but, i'm gonna go talk to the others about it
um
can you leave this chat open?
Leon Gaspar: NI: yeah, sure!
cL: so we're moving in time together
Leon Gaspar: NI: do you mind if i tell my friends about you?
cL: oh! go ahead!
Leon Gaspar: NI: also if you get a message from someone named ilmatar, i apologise in advance
cL: i mean, hopefully we're all heading there anyways
uh
Leon Gaspar: NI: i love her but she is very enthusiastic
cL: oh, word of warning
we're in a different "temporal envelope" than you
or not in one at all and you are, technically
i think
like i said, don't ask me about time
Leon Gaspar: NI: fair enough
cL: but anyways, this conversation should keep us two synched up as long as its open
but if your friend tries to reach me at this handle, she could get me years in the past
Leon Gaspar: NI: ohhh
cL: or "no reception" centuries after we're all dead
yeah, that's why i asked you to leave it open
Leon Gaspar: NI: i will warn her. it .... might not stop her. or it might! she's unpredictable like that
NI: will do
cL: i've contacted
fuck, must be hundreds of handles
on all sorts of different chat clients
Leon Gaspar: NI: 'not accidentally trying to call you when you're dead' sounds like a good plan
cL: "pesterchum" "trollian" "squiddlenagger"
Leon Gaspar: NI: i can already tell this time thing is gonna drive me nuts
cL: nobody ever picked up
Leon Gaspar: NI: oh hey, pesterchum, that's us!
cL: you're not the only ones
you're the first ones where there was anyone there, though!
Leon Gaspar: NI: hey, well, there you go
NI: that's fate for you, probably
NI: fate seems like a thing that might exist in this game
cL: i dunno, ask bR
Leon Gaspar: NI: or maybe dumb luck
cL: uh
Leon Gaspar: NI: we just don't know
cL: i'll see if any of us can set up a thing so the others can contact you
like "now"
for you
Leon Gaspar: NI: that'd be cool
NI: it's kinda lonely just the six of us
NI: er, five
cL: uh
Leon Gaspar: NI: oh, um
cL: oh no
Leon Gaspar: NI: if you, um, if you manage to contact someone named sera
NI: could you ask her where she is?
NI: no it's ok! she's probably alive
NI: we just
NI: haven't heard from her since we entered
cL: okay...
will do
Leon Gaspar: NI: sorry
NI: long shot
cL: what's her handle?
Leon Gaspar: NI: but worth a try
(an excellent question!)
Wiwaxia (GM): (shitfuck, sprung that trap on myself)
:y
Leon Gaspar: (kathy never gave her one, did she?)
Wiwaxia (GM): nope
Leon Gaspar: (:P maybe it's corrupted and leon conveniently can't remember)
Wiwaxia (GM): i'll see if kathy wants to or if i should make one up after this session
but yeah, let's say leon can't remember for now
Leon Gaspar: NI: i. good question.
NI: chat client's being weird, i'll get back to you on that one
NI: also ... thanks
cL: yeah
thank you too
fistbumps?
er...
Leon Gaspar: NI: sweet
cL: if you have fists
i guess
Leon Gaspar: NI: damn right we do
cL: sweet
Leon Gaspar: NI: bunp
cL: bump
Leon Gaspar: (i always forget about the * italics thing)
Arxon: (I am glad we will be able to bridge the gap of interspecies communication with the purest of all languages, fistbumps)
Leon Gaspar: (truly beautiful)

 

Spoiler: myrtha half-dreamwalks out into a dersite eclipse and listens to the horrorterrors sine

Wiwaxia (GM): okay, that's one for out of context, i think
also afk momentarily
Leon Gaspar: (that ok)
(time to obtain snacks)
(also i gotta say, i nearly tapped out at 2am because i was falling asleep and i am so glad i didn't. this is awesome)
Wiwaxia (GM): back
and yay, I'm glad you're liking it!
:3
Arxon: (Hey I gotta go for like 20 mins, my throat is absolutely killing me and I need to go get cough drops)
Wiwaxia (GM): no worries
actually, i have a thing i needa do before midnight here, so i'm gonna go do that, then come back and see if anyones still here and if i've still got time and vim to run some more
if moss or karrin show up in the interim, let em know what's up, K?
Leon Gaspar: (can do!)
Wiwaxia (GM): thanks!
Leon Gaspar: (if i am still awake. whims, how're you holding up?)
whimsy: (pretty good actually)
(i just forgot to take my meds and am in happy attention defici-OOH SHINY land)
Leon Gaspar: (ahhh)
(i know that feel, but with not-so-happy lying-on-the-couch land)
(i'm probably gonna either take a nap or straight-up fall asleep; if anyone else comes the ping may or may not wake me up)
k m.: (ugh hi sorry, intended short dinner, did not take into account -tiny shitty food place with one cook- and -literally twelve 18-24 yr olds on a team-
)
Arxon: (It's alright!
Wiwaxia is Doing a Thing for a bit, but they'll be back around midnight their time and we'll see if we're continuing then)
k m.: ((i read that! I'll hang around
not to be a downer or anything, but i do feel super bad for perpetually screwing up timing with all things
even though i know it's not technically my fault, i still feel like i should apologize literally all the time
but this is not therapy hour so
:I
))
whimsy: (-hugs moss-)
Arxon: ((Hey it's alright tell me 3 odd weeks ago that this ain't therapy hour sometimes venting happens
I don't think you're screwing up timing, and hey, we all wanna do this together so we're all gonna make this work, right? It's no big))
whimsy: (tbh the subday night session has the benefit that even if i attend a con, i dont mss the game because im usually back at home by sunday night)
k m.: ((hah thx gaiz
mostly just
so frustrate in general))
whimsy: (8eeh, shit happens, dont sweat it)
Arxon: ((it's alright I understand I still feel like a dirty time waster
hugs all around))
whimsy: (i mean i wouldnt have been able to do this last semester, but my timetable is a bit less full this semester as im wrapping up my degree oh gods im going to write a bachelors thesis in the near future im not ok with this)
(with the prospect of writing a thesis, i mean)
k m.: ((high fives all round for _not_ being dirty time wasters))
Arxon: (Well I mean like the first 3 hours of todays session was "Lemi in bureaucracy" so :V)
k m.: ((bureacracy is so weirdly fun tho))
Arxon: ((Also kick that thesis's ass. Let it know whats what))
Wiwaxia (GM): i return
i don't think i'm up for running more though, sorry y'all
:c
Arxon: mk!
Wiwaxia (GM): p.s. online quizzes due at midnight exactly are the worst
Arxon: ugh I knooowwww
I spent all last night doing a longass test online and it was emotionally draining
night, then!
Wiwaxia (GM): night!
sorry moss and whimsy, i'll be sure to spend some time with you next session
which will probably be week after next
k m.: no worries! i'm glad i was able to at least show up
and that works! i will physically put it into my calendar
Wiwaxia (GM): i am glad you got to observe at least some of the cL shenanigans
whimsy: week after next might be tricky, im on a con, but i'll see that im online "_"
might be a tad late
Wiwaxia (GM): we'll work it out in thread
yeah, next weekend is the last hurrah for marching band and also i'm heading into the late-semester, pre-thanksgiving crunch
sooooooo
whimsy: the question is, do i get to my parents place where the wifi is before midnight ::D
::D
Wiwaxia (GM): oh also someone remember to poke me to update the timeline before next time because like hell i'm doing it now
whimsy: ::D
k m.: ok on that note
i will talk to you guys later!
whimsy: n8 then
k m.: trying this whole mobile thing today
(Not) Literally A Bird: ey, good luck
Karrin Blue: Hey
k m.: hiya
Wiwaxia (GM): woo
so we're just waiting on arxon, yeah?
(Not) Literally A Bird: looks like it
Wiwaxia (GM): hallo
Arxon: AHAHA HI SRRY
Wiwaxia (GM): no worries
Arxon: I was dragged away on what was supposed to be a half hour grocery shopping that turned into 3 hours
Karrin Blue: D:
(Not) Literally A Bird: iiii know that feel
Wiwaxia (GM): aaaaaaugh
long periods of time shopping are the WORST
Arxon: "Oh we could have a chicken instead of a turkey this year!"
"Mom you did that last year and made me swear to never let you do it again. YOu were crying. Get a turkey."
Karrin Blue: wow
Wiwaxia (GM): that's uh
a pretty resounding endorsement for turkey
also sounds p draining
Arxon: Alas, it s the theatre season which means the house has transformed into a raging whirlwind of fabric
anyway
Karrin Blue: It's theater season where you are
same here
Arxon: yeah the holidays are always the Worst, stress and emotions wise
Wiwaxia (GM): right
well, everyone ready to start?
Karrin Blue: yes
Arxon: yeah
(Not) Literally A Bird: aye aye
Wiwaxia (GM): so lets see
as i recall
Karrin Blue: I missed last session so
recap?
Wiwaxia (GM): moss was hanging out on prospit with ilmatar
lemi was trapped in Beauraucracy Hell for several hours
then got a very Interesting audience with the Black Queen
Karrin Blue: wha
ah.
Wiwaxia (GM): and leon was chatting with an alien while slowly getting colder and colder
(Not) Literally A Bird: yeah leon's gonna die of hypothermia soon
Karrin Blue: wow
whooo's near him?
(Not) Literally A Bird: absolutely no-one!
i mean he'll probably be ok if he can get back to his apartment and find some clothes
Karrin Blue: ...s he naked?
Arxon: Take a earm bath, probably
(Not) Literally A Bird: in his underwear. he went for a swim
Arxon: shit, do we still have plumbing?
Wiwaxia (GM): yeah, most of his clothes got stolen by a wave
Karrin Blue: yes
Wiwaxia (GM): yep, except moss
cause, you know
drought
k m.: ....I'm literally in cali right now
...how ironic
Wiwaxia (GM): ahahahaha
well that worked out
Karrin Blue: what happened to me last time?
or last time i was here
Wiwaxia (GM): as i recall, last we saw myrtha, she woke up, saw off the consort petitioners, contemplated exploring the underground, and decided to go back and sleep a little more
Karrin Blue: ah yes
recovering more hp + trying to get to derse
Wiwaxia (GM): mhm
speaking of which
grace check?
and while we're rolling
Karrin Blue: that's a d8?
Wiwaxia (GM): entire grace score+ d20
higher is better
Karrin Blue: rolling 1d20+8
(
13
)+8
= 21
Wiwaxia (GM): leon, fortitude save vs. progression of hypothermia?
(Not) Literally A Bird: is that just a d20?
Wiwaxia (GM): yep, roll low
(Not) Literally A Bird: rolling 1d20
(
3
)
= 3
eyy
Wiwaxia (GM): like that
you are still merely shivering controllably
@myrtha, that's a narrow success
so, hmm
roxy-style sleepwalking sound fair?
Karrin Blue: Sure
is there someone on Derse I could run into?
in the general area i eman
Wiwaxia (GM): lemme check time lineups
lemi is theoretically awake on derse right now
but is stuck in a very tidy office trying to resist the urge to snoop
(spoilers: she fails)
@myrtha
you dream of blue and purple
Wiwaxia (GM): in you dream, you float out a window
like it was the most natural thing in the world
all around you is black
below you is a city half-seen through the mists of drowsiness
a tiny pale blue light on the narrow horizon vanishes slowly into a forest of spires
song calls to you from the black
Wiwaxia (GM): songs of broken glass and the unsounded sea past the bottom of conciousness
what do you do?
remember that dream Myrtha is only half awake and does not think this is anything more than a dream
Myrtha Oscurr: head towards the music, I suppose
Wiwaxia (GM): the city dwindles rapidly behind you into a tiny little jewel alone in the black
visions rise up before your unseeing eyes, like lights playing on the back of your eyelids
from here, you can tell there are many singers in vast chorus
choirs in shapes undreamed of
though mostly featuring hosts of tentacles and mouths
the songs change, almost imperceptibly
Wiwaxia (GM): welcoming you
Myrtha Oscurr: how nice of them!
((is there any kind of threateningness to them, or reason for Myrtha to be going 'wait something's not right here' other than the multitude of tentacles))
((and that's assuming that the horrorterrors are malicious at all, really))
Wiwaxia (GM): they are not threatening you at all. their welcomes are sincere.
but you also have a kind of dream-awareness of a not-rightness to them, something nightmarish, maybe, or just a little bit off
when you try to think about it too hard, the feeling swims away, ungrasped
Myrtha Oscurr: huh
well, nothing too weird for a PERFECTLY NORMAL dream, i suppose!
though myrtha is probably only half aware she's asleep as well so
Wiwaxia (GM): there is a hesitancy in the song now
like an invitation
or a conversational silence
waiting for you to speak, if you choose
but with no obligation to fill it
Myrtha Oscurr: I seee
hm
not sure if it would be ic to say anything
guess i'll just continue looking and floating there
float towards any that look particularly friendly to a sleepwalker, whatever that'd be
Wiwaxia (GM): you can tell somehow, from looking, that none are near to you
that although you see them floating around you
these are just projections from a vast distance
Myrtha Oscurr: huh
Wiwaxia (GM): like gazing upon the seafloor of an impossibly clear ocean
or the alignment of constellations seen from Earth
Myrtha Oscurr: and they still look big and tentacley from here?
well, going by gl'bgloyb
Wiwaxia (GM): though one of the stars may be nearer to you than the one "next" to it
yep, and gl'bgloyb is p small for a horrorterror
and time and space are all fucked up in the furthest ring
Myrtha Oscurr: right
not that i know that at the time
so i am having a weird dreamish freakout over WOW HUGE
i guess i will just kind of wave at the nearer one?
Wiwaxia (GM): there is a distant stirring of tentacles, as if in an unseen current
somewhere in the tentacled hosts, a new theme begins
quiet, on the edges of the song
like a whispered aside
a theme of the illusions of distance and volume
the lies that Space tells
Wiwaxia (GM): of the speed of dreams and the senses of the insensate
Myrtha Oscurr: huh
i assume this music is of the 'completely super unreproducable by humans' sort
which is probably for the best because ooc i am tempted to try and hum along or something
which would _probably_ not end well
even if these are nice horrorterrors
Wiwaxia (GM): yeah, it's dream-music
and barely grasped even by dreaming ears
you could try to hum along, of course
because, you know, dreaming and dreamselves
it would be a bit like trying to hum along to an orchestra, though
Myrtha Oscurr: yeah
so i'll try and commit it to memory, I guess?
as much as possible
when it's horrorterrors and dream music
Wiwaxia (GM): k
that'll be a grace check to try to recall it later
if you're your dreamself
and a grace check at disadvantage (roll twice, take the lower) if you're awake
you just going to hang there and listen to it for a while?
Myrtha Oscurr: yeah i think so?
i mean I'm dreaming
Wiwaxia (GM): the song stays as it was, still with that hesitancy in it, for a bit
then new songs build up, like orchestras tuning a planet's worth of larynxes
you can feel some attention on you that you hadn't even realized was there fade
the song is no longer unified
not dischordant
more like the background babble of conversation in a large room at a party
Wiwaxia (GM): as you sit on the couch slightly tipsy and pleasantly drowsy
being present, but out of the flow
seeing only the patterns the ripples make, not the waves that made them
you feel... cozy, almost, in the blackness
despite the awareness of utter emptiness all around
as if it is missing not only heat but somehow also missing all cold
Wiwaxia (GM): missing not only closeness but also distance
Myrtha Oscurr: I... see?
Wiwaxia (GM): you gonna do anything else, or just drift off to sleep/waking comfortably?
Myrtha Oscurr: Drift off
Wiwaxia (GM): i'm gonna roll for how ling you were asleep this time, because it seems like something where you'd have less control over how long you slept
Myrtha Oscurr: yeah
plus, time screwery
Wiwaxia (GM): rolling 1d8
(
6
)
= 6
well then
you sleep for 6 hours, netting you 6+1d6 hp back
Myrtha Oscurr: rolling 1d6
(
3
)
= 3
Wiwaxia (GM): and putting you ahead of even future!ilmatar on the timeline
Myrtha Oscurr: sheet updated
Wiwaxia (GM): you're at T=~29 hours when you wake up, btw
Myrtha Oscurr: OK
Wiwaxia (GM): so i think i'm gonna switch to either leon
or waking!moss
Myrtha Oscurr: ok!
Wiwaxia (GM): since dream moss is occupied with ilmatar and we can't play through that right now
huzzah for nonlinearity
k m.: whee
Wiwaxia (GM): you wanna do waking moss, or wait to play through waking up linearly?
k m.: uhhh, how far am I either way in the timeline?
Myrtha Oscurr: yeah can i see the timeline link please?
Wiwaxia (GM): timeline is currently only on my computer, sorry
i'll have to figure out a way to get it online
i can probably post screenshots of it at least
anyways
Myrtha Oscurr: mkay
Wiwaxia (GM): dream moss and ilmatar are currently at T=17:30 visiting TS
ilmatar wakes up at T=24hours
leon is awake and at a little after T=21 hours
myrtha is asleep and won't be waking up until T=29
dream lemi is currently at T=26 hours and can wake up whenever
k m.: huh ok
well...I figure we should wait till ilmatar then, to guesstimate when moss wlaes up?
.... good lord *wakes
Wiwaxia (GM): sorry, can't parse that
are you saying waking up at about the same time as ilmatar?
or waiting until whimsy's here to decide
k m.: oh hang on
Wiwaxia (GM): actually, here, have a screenshot of just the sleeping bit of the timeline
one sec
k m.: am I waking up at same time as ilmatar? or is that yet to be determined
Wiwaxia (GM): http://i.imgur.com/wYbfsso.png
yet to be determined
you can choose more-or-less when you wake up
k m.: sorry, phone dumbfucked at me
looking at timeline
Myrtha Oscurr: Oh, the dersite eclipse happened
I guess that's why I could get to there so easily
Wiwaxia (GM): yep
Myrtha Oscurr: the eclipse is when the horrorterrors are closest, right? like how the prospit one is when skaia is closest
Wiwaxia (GM): yep
Myrtha Oscurr: OK!
Wiwaxia (GM): or, technically
when the moon is on the horrorterror-facing side of its orbit
Myrtha Oscurr: right
k m.: mk. hm. ill wake up a little before ilm, then
Wiwaxia (GM): right-o
you get 6+1d6 hp
Myrtha Oscurr: what time's that, then?
k m.: rolling d6 + 6
(
5
)+6
= 11
Wiwaxia (GM): and when you check your phone, you note that it has been about 23 hours and change since you entered
Moss Kaplan: "wow I have been asleep super long"
"weird"
-shrugs-
(no wait I'm losing my mind ignore me)
uh, I look around
I assume I'm in my room, because (I) cant remember what happened before this
Wiwaxia (GM): you went out on a hike
got your ass kicked by a basilisk
and decided to get some rest before trying to do anything
Leon Gaspar: (ugh brb, shouldn't be long)
Wiwaxia (GM): kay
Moss Kaplan: oh right. well I seem to be feeling way better. damn basilisks
in that case, I look outside to see if anything's sneaking up on my house
(wow what a great time for wifi to be a _dick_ , I may cut in and out as I switch back n forth here)
Wiwaxia (GM): kay
lesse what you see

 

Spoiler: moss mildly inconveniences a giclops. they rock

Moss Kaplan: also I can only see the chat, just fyi, since my phone screen is like 2.5 x 5ish
Wiwaxia (GM): kay, i'll try to make sure i don't have you do anything super mappish
(To GM) rolling 3d6
(
1
+
2
+
2
)
= 5
Wiwaxia (GM): (To GM) rolling 1d8
(
1
)
= 1
Wiwaxia (GM): you see what you think is TA clubbing an imp to death
(To GM) rolling 1d8
(
8
)
= 8
Moss Kaplan: wow go TA. does she look like she needs any help?
Wiwaxia (GM): not with the imp, no
Myrtha Oscurr: what do the goblins look like?
Wiwaxia (GM): in the other direction you can see some sort of giant wading through the trees
@myrtha
nobody knows
Myrtha Oscurr: oh
Wiwaxia (GM): well, i do
Myrtha Oscurr: ta is someone here?
i can't remember everyone's abbreviations
Wiwaxia (GM): TA is a carapacian
Myrtha Oscurr: oh
Wiwaxia (GM): tireless author
Myrtha Oscurr: ohkay
Moss Kaplan: well, I'm running down for the hell of it. just in case that giant does stuff
Wiwaxia (GM): you can tell carapacian titles apart from chumhandles etc. becuase they're all caps. like AC versus aC
Myrtha Oscurr: Oh, OK
Wiwaxia (GM): and I'm gonna do my best to avoid doubles
@moss, gonna get anything together before you go, or just run out with what you've got on you?
Moss Kaplan: uh. gardening tools still in my stuff, yeah? and...I grad some books
*grab
Wiwaxia (GM): gardening tools apparently not still with you, since they don't seem to be on your sylladex card
Moss Kaplan: oh right, I think I tossed them on my room floor to make life complicated for anyone coming in
well, I pick them up
Wiwaxia (GM): gotcha
Leon Gaspar: (no longer afk!)
Wiwaxia (GM): make sure to note that in your sylladex
i think you still had a aerating claw and a couple trowels?
Moss Kaplan: true, also apparently cannot edit my sylladex on phone
Wiwaxia (GM): k, will add for you
Moss Kaplan: so let's just pretend I set my phone on fire-well that works too
Wiwaxia (GM): how long do you wanna spend looking for books?
you can find a couple a minute
i'll roll on my books table and tell you if they're heavy enough to be useful
Moss Kaplan: uh, 2 minutes
Wiwaxia (GM): 4d100
rolling 4d100
(
44
+
62
+
40
+
3
)
= 149
rolling 1d10
(
4
)
= 4
a mediocre fantasy novel
a nice heavy meteorology book
rolling 1d4
(
1
)
= 1
Moss Kaplan: I'll take em
Wiwaxia (GM): a book on the theory of artistic photography
and a gardening book
the fantasy novel's probably too light for your purposes
but the others are sufficiently hefty
Moss Kaplan: good, ill take the heavy three
and run down to ...the giant was in the trees, right?
Wiwaxia (GM): a ways away, yeah
it's head was sticking up out over the canopy
Moss Kaplan: well, jog, at any rate. once I get to the trees, I'm going to want to slow down and be more quiet/cautious
Wiwaxia (GM): you jog easily across the riverbed
the mud you played in earlier is now only slightly damp, and starting to crack
TA has apparently finished beating up the imp and has noticed you
she waves to you through the heat haze
Moss Kaplan: "wow it's just like california" I find myself thinking for no reason, since obviously I've never been outside of Wisconsin.
I wave back
Wiwaxia (GM): she raises her hands to her mouth and hollers something, but you're too far away to hear
so she starts jogging towards you
Moss Kaplan: I wave again, put finger to lips in universal "sh theres a giant probably" gesture
Wiwaxia (GM): she comes over to you, out of breath
Tireless Author: hey, thanks for the tip about the mountain
it's really interesting
looks like it's been fairly wet until just recently
like maybe a day ago
but now its starting to dry up like everything else
Moss Kaplan: "yeah, hi, hey, there's a giant in that forest I think"
Tireless Author: there was mud here too, a few hours ago
what
Moss Kaplan: "I saw it from my window"
Tireless Author: oh dear
i have noticed the ogres are getting more common
i've been doing my best to avoid them
i saw some sort of snake thing around, too
Moss Kaplan: "yeah nice job on that imp"
Tireless Author: shyeah
i can handle those
it's the big jobs i'm worried about
say, you'd say this giant was bigger than an ogre, yeah?
Moss Kaplan: "yeah looked like"
Tireless Author: crud
i don't think i could take a solid hit from one of those things
let alone this big giant you're talking about
Moss Kaplan: "well, I came down because, hey, it's my house. but i saw it in the forest. if you're worried, you should be able to cut around and I can distract it"
Tireless Author: thanks for offering, but are you sure you'll be okay?
i've had pretty good luck so far with just keeping out of these things' way
and i don't want you getting hurt
Moss Kaplan: "I should be able to at least outrun the thing. don't worry, I'm no hero"
"I can just distract it, and you're guaranteed to be out of its way"
Tireless Author: ...
alright
be safe, okay?
Moss Kaplan: -salutes- "will do"
Tireless Author: oh also, one last thing
which direction are you planning to lead it?
don't want to both go the same way by accident
Moss Kaplan: "hm. I was thinking thataway" -pointing "north" on map-
Tireless Author: got it!
I owe you another one, Moss
thanks again
Tireless Author takes off
Moss Kaplan: "sure thing"
ok, im going to approach from this direction and then make a bunch of noise and then cut north
Wiwaxia (GM): rolling 1t[THE-ADVENTURE-DIE-OF-ADVENTURE!!(and/or-misery)]
(
4 You are starting to feel a bit worn down. Lose a pip of endurance.
)
= 4
Moss Kaplan: because I laugh in the face of danger. ah hah hah
Wiwaxia (GM): you get a bit tuckered out making noise, but nothing to worry about just yet
and you don't run into any nasty surprises in the underbrush, which is good
Moss Kaplan: what
o ok
Wiwaxia (GM): what what?
Moss Kaplan: saw the roll, was confused, all good now
Wiwaxia (GM): K
you can hear the giant monster coming closer
really, it's pretty hard not to hear it
what with the smashing of wood and rustling of leaves
Moss Kaplan: yay! the enormous death machine knows I'm here! why do I do this
I wait a little longer till it's just out of sight
and then I run
while making so much noise
Wiwaxia (GM): there is, unfortunately, a slight hitch in your plan
Moss Kaplan: oh good!
Wiwaxia (GM): which is that an ogre bursts out of the undergrowth, the sounds of its approach masked by the din of the giant
Moss Kaplan: fuckkk
wellp
I prepare to do battle
Wiwaxia (GM): note that if you hang around and fight this thing, the giclops will show up
(To GM) rolling 1d2
(
1
)
= 1
Wiwaxia (GM): it's got skeletal paws and fins
Moss Kaplan: -sigh-
screw it, it was a slow day anyway
I insult its mother
Wiwaxia (GM): one sec, sorry
Moss Kaplan: no worries
(also apparently it's laundromat day so now I'm at a laundromat without my character sheet which is cool)
Wiwaxia (GM): (To GM) rolling 1d2
(
1
)
= 1
Wiwaxia (GM): right,
ready
rolling 1d6
(
5
)
= 5
is the ogres initiative
you roll too
also, can you not see your character sheet on the app?
Moss Kaplan: rolling d6
(
2
)
= 2
Wiwaxia (GM): ogre's got the drop on you
rolling 1d20-1
(
17
)-1
= 16
it's just gonna sock you
uh oh
rolling 1d12
(
5
)
= 5
damage
k m.: (ha, hilarious. it pulls it up but it's not expanded. so I can see my name and that's it)
Wiwaxia (GM): fuuun
well, i'll read off it for you
you are currently at half hp, btw
Moss Kaplan: I'm gonna kick it.
in the face
Wiwaxia (GM): that's +0 to hit, 1d10 damage for you
Moss Kaplan: rolling d20
(
12
)
= 12
Wiwaxia (GM): that hits handily
or footily
Moss Kaplan: hee
Wiwaxia (GM): realy
Moss Kaplan: rolling d10
(
6
)
= 6
and then shoot meterology book out of my captcha
Wiwaxia (GM): that's +0 to hit, 1d6 damage
Moss Kaplan: rolling d20
(
13
)
= 13
rolling d6
(
5
)
= 5
Wiwaxia (GM): it's not lookin like a super happy camper
are you gonna run, too?
Moss Kaplan: good, it's a jerk
yes
is the giant around still
Wiwaxia (GM): yep, still heading your way
although it'll take it a bit to get there
Moss Kaplan: I holla while running
still "north"
Wiwaxia (GM): you're faster than the ogre, but it jumps up and starts climbing through the trees you have to run around
your turn
Moss Kaplan: yay! I throw a trowel at it
Wiwaxia (GM): with your sylladex, I assume?
Moss Kaplan: yupyup
Wiwaxia (GM): -1 because it's up enough to be on the edge of your firing range
still 1d6 damage
Moss Kaplan: kep
rolling d20 -1
(
12
)-1
= 11
Wiwaxia (GM): that hits!
Moss Kaplan: rolling d6
(
5
)
= 5
hahah suck it ogre eat trowel
Wiwaxia (GM): i assume you're still running?
Moss Kaplan: yupppp
Wiwaxia (GM): the ogre is a damn good climber and manages to overtake you by swinging through the trees like a colossal tusked orangutan
Moss Kaplan: what a jerk
Wiwaxia (GM): you can hear that the two of you are pulling away from the slower giclops
(btw, the ogres been trading its attacks for more movement to keep up with you)
your turn
Moss Kaplan: huh, ok
I switch from "north" to back to my tower, as either of those directions are away from TA
Wiwaxia (GM): gonna fire something else at the ogre?
Moss Kaplan: yeah, another trowel
same deal, negative 1?
Wiwaxia (GM): yep
Moss Kaplan: rolling d20 - 1
(
5
)-1
= 4
shit goodbye trowel
Wiwaxia (GM): the trowel goes wide into the forest as you turn
the ogre roars in frustration behind you and starts clambering after you again
Moss Kaplan: noppppe. next one I'm doing the same thing. attack for speed
Wiwaxia (GM): even with all your unfavorable dodging of roots, you get a solid 4m lead on the ogre
your turn again
Moss Kaplan: if I'm still in the forest, I'm gonna run, dodge, dive outta view. and then be vewwy vewwy quiet because we is chasing wabbits
Wiwaxia (GM): still in the forest, yeah
dex check to hide
Moss Kaplan: rolling d20
(
3
)
= 3
plus anything?
Wiwaxia (GM): entire dex score
Moss Kaplan: can you see that?
Wiwaxia (GM): oh right
so 3+9
12
you completely fail to hide
Moss Kaplan: I am laying spreadeagled on the ground
Wiwaxia (GM): the ogre drops out of the trees and charges full-tilt towards you
fortunately, it's still fairly slow
so you've got time to react before impact
Moss Kaplan: im gonna stop it. with my foot
rolling d20
(
4
)
= 4
Wiwaxia (GM): nope
Moss Kaplan: whoops
Wiwaxia (GM): gonna run?
Moss Kaplan: yupp
Wiwaxia (GM): which way?
with respect to oncoming ogre
Moss Kaplan: I have pissed off the dice gods
Wiwaxia (GM): you've also got time for a sylladex shot, btw
Moss Kaplan: you know what maybe itll be surprised if I....shoot the aerated trowel thing at it and then dodge to the left!
rolling d20
(
8
)
= 8
Wiwaxia (GM): that hits!
charge penalty to def
1d6 damage
Moss Kaplan: rolling d6
(
5
)
= 5
THANK YOU DICE GODS
-I find myself thinking for no apparent reason-
Wiwaxia (GM): the ogre is taken aback by the gardening claw to the face and breaks off its charge
it roars at you uncertainly
Moss Kaplan: I roar back, slightly less uncertainty but also confused
*uncertainly
Wiwaxia (GM): it is at this point you realize that you are running directly towards the giclops
Moss Kaplan: I roar again
but in an "oh fuck" way
Wiwaxia (GM): your turn
ogre isn't pursuing, for now at least
Moss Kaplan: .................. so ogre on one side, giclops on the other. I go in the penultimate direction
hopefully towards my house?
Wiwaxia (GM): nope, ogre's between you and your house
remaining direction is back north
Moss Kaplan: you know what, fuck this ogre. I'm going to roar. while running past it.
Wiwaxia (GM): gonna kick it on the way or just run?
and shoot
you can shoot it either way
Moss Kaplan: yeah imma kick it and shoot it
rolling d20
(
15
)
= 15
Wiwaxia (GM): thhhat hits, yes
Moss Kaplan: rolling d8
(
7
)
= 7
Wiwaxia (GM): it's dead
Moss Kaplan: I dance while roaring primally
Wiwaxia (GM): you put your foot down into a cube of blue goop and get 1d6 hp back
Moss Kaplan: then I collect grist and fuckin book it
yay!
Wiwaxia (GM): why don't you roll for that while I get grist tallied
Moss Kaplan: rolling d6
(
5
)
= 5
Wiwaxia (GM): you get 48 sandstone and 11 loam, and are back to 11 hp
Moss Kaplan: yes!
while running, I highfive myself because I feel so good
Wiwaxia (GM): are you stopping to collect your gardening hook or no?
Moss Kaplan: ...yyyes. yes
Wiwaxia (GM): the giclopses foot crashes down uncomfortably close to you
it's big
like almost as wide around as you are tall
Moss Kaplan: uh. oops. nope, running time
putting everything I got into running
Wiwaxia (GM): it takes a swipe at you with a massive arm as you flee
rolling 1d20-2
(
16
)-2
= 14
rolling 2d8
(
7
+
2
)
= 9
ouch
Moss Kaplan: nooooo
Myrtha Oscurr: that's gonna leave a mark
Wiwaxia (GM): you are now at 2 hp
Moss Kaplan: I
uh
continue running
Wiwaxia (GM): you leave it behind in pretty short order
Moss Kaplan: home home home home
...jiggety jig
Wiwaxia (GM): and come to the banks of the dry river
you're a little "north" of home
keep running?
Moss Kaplan: run home but not directly home, just slowly correcting course so I don't cut across directly in front of giclops
like a spiral? if makes sense
Wiwaxia (GM): yeah, gotcha
there's a boom and a tearing of vines and leaves as the giant tears out of the side of the forest and into the river
and needs to make a fortitude save to avoid falling on its stupid face
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
= 6
which it makes handily
Moss Kaplan: "why are you so dumb" I mutter to myself "you could have just warned TA and gone home, but nooooo"
Wiwaxia (GM): you get up onto the island around your home by the time the giclops has gotten its momentum all sorted out and is coming in the right direction again
fortitude save vs. runner's cramp
Moss Kaplan: what was my fort
rolling d20
(
16
)
= 16
Wiwaxia (GM): nope
you're forced to drop back to walking pace
(your fort's 9)
your front door is about 40m away
the giclops is just over the horizon, so probably like 120m
Moss Kaplan: I limp as fast as possible
Wiwaxia (GM): fortunately for you, your limping is as fast as the giclops's top speed
Moss Kaplan: planning on knocking everything I see in front of it when I get inside
oh hey go me
Wiwaxia (GM): you enter the foyer
there's a transportalizer in the middle, btw
Moss Kaplan: oh ok I go upstairs, have fun giant
Wiwaxia (GM): going to your room or?
Moss Kaplan: room sweet room
Wiwaxia (GM): you've just started to relax when you hear something below you
Moss Kaplan: "oh -come on-"
Wiwaxia (GM): look out the window?
Moss Kaplan: yep
Wiwaxia (GM): the giclops has started slowly climbing the side of your tower
Moss Kaplan: I go to my moms room and bring up as many gardening magazines as I can
and then I start throwing them out the window at its face and hands
Wiwaxia (GM): k
you can drop 2 a round
they're 1d20 to hit
Moss Kaplan: rolling d20
(
2
)
= 2
Wiwaxia (GM): nope
Moss Kaplan: rolling d20
(
12
)
= 12
Wiwaxia (GM): that one hits
hmm, i assume you're dropping them in stacks?
Moss Kaplan: yep
Wiwaxia (GM): let's call that 1d4-2 damage, then, plus falling damage
Moss Kaplan: rolling d4 - 2
(
1
)-2
= -1
Wiwaxia (GM): hmm, one sec, trying to figure out when a stack of magazines would hit terminal velocity
for effective falling damage
Arxon: ...that is a good out of context quote
Moss Kaplan: pff
Myrtha Oscurr: post it
also gonna be afk for a bit while i grab snacks, will return soon!
Wiwaxia (GM): k, looks like terminal velocity for your stack of magazines is about 10m/s
which equates to a person falling about 6m
and thus deals (hp by weight)*1d6 falling damage
for a grand total of
rolling 1d2*1d6
(
1
)*(
6
)
= 6
everyone who can actually see the screen, please watch this thing's hp bar
Leon Gaspar: welp
Moss Kaplan: ...does it not go down at all
am I screwed
am I super screwed
Leon Gaspar: it went down! just... not by much
Moss Kaplan: I'm super screwed. Im gonna get fucked up by a giant because I'm an idiot. I'm going to moms room
Wiwaxia (GM): note that you've still got two books and an aerating claw to drop or fire
the giclops continues to climb
Moss Kaplan: oh ok I'll drop the books first
fire them downwards¿
...
?
rolling d20
(
20
)
= 20
Leon Gaspar: B)
Moss Kaplan: oh hell yeah
Wiwaxia (GM): alright then
that's gonna be, let's see
3+1d3! (exclamation mark means exploding)
or 1d3+10 whichever is highet
*higher
plus falling damage which i'm gonna go calculate
Moss Kaplan: rolling d3 +3
(
1
)+3
= 4
wait what
is exploding something else
rolling d3 + 10
(
3
)+10
= 13
Wiwaxia (GM): exploding means that every time you roll the max value of a die, you keep it and roll the die again and add it
it can get p ridiculous
Arxon: (a friend of my once exploded a d4 up to 33)
Wiwaxia (GM): rolling 1d3*1d6
(
1
)*(
2
)
= 2
Moss Kaplan: like farkle. ok so I just... roll a d3 a bunch?
Wiwaxia (GM): well, you didn't get it to explode, so instead of normal crit behavior the book just hit it in the eye
the very vulnerable eye
Moss Kaplan: ok hah suck it giclops
Wiwaxia (GM): gonna fire your other book this round too, or hold on to it?
Moss Kaplan: gonna fire the trowel at the eye
fuckit
rolling d20
(
17
)
= 17
Wiwaxia (GM): that hits!
Moss Kaplan: mwaHaHaHa
Wiwaxia (GM): roll 1d3+10
rolling 1d3*1d6
(
1
)*(
6
)
= 6
Moss Kaplan: rolling d3 +10
(
1
)+10
= 11
Myrtha Oscurr: I return
Wiwaxia (GM): the giclops decides this ain't worth it and starts climbing back down
Moss Kaplan: I laugh kind of hysterically
Wiwaxia (GM): (To GM) rolling (45-45)/45
(45-45)/45
= 0
Wiwaxia (GM): (To GM) rolling (43-45)/45
(43-45)/45
= -0.044444444444444446
Wiwaxia (GM): (To GM) rolling (16-45)/45
(16-45)/45
= -0.6444444444444445
Leon Gaspar: ((im actually laughing holy shit i wish you could see its health bar))
Moss Kaplan: wait why
did I fuck it up
am I awesome
Wiwaxia (GM): you fucked it up pretty bad, yeah
Moss Kaplan: go me im cool
-does a dance-
Wiwaxia (GM): it's at like 1/3 health
(To GM) rolling (45-16)/45
(45-16)/45
= 0.6444444444444445
Moss Kaplan: duude
Wiwaxia (GM): (To GM) rolling .644444444444444445*.6444444444444444444444445
0.6444444444444445*0.6444444444444445
= 0.4153086419753087
Moss Kaplan: I mildly inconvenienced a giant
I rock