WTF Brain Autocorrect? - the majestic sea pancake and other substitutions

Discussion in 'General Chatter' started by Socket, Nov 25, 2016.

  1. Squid

    Squid *contents may vary*

    I was visiting Bristol with my S/O and asked if we could go to the fish museum.

    "Fish museum?"
    "Do you mean aquarium?"
    • Like x 16
  2. Deresto

    Deresto Foolish Mortal

    one time i couldnt remember the word actor so i said "you know, the male actress"
    • Like x 12
  3. Technicality

    Technicality All's fair in love and shitposting

    My mom once called the wired phone we used to have in the house the "swirly phone" because it had a cord that was in a spiral
    • Like x 7
  4. palindromordnilap

    palindromordnilap Well-Known Member

    My mother almost always mixes up my and my brothers' names. This isn't unusual in larger families but, uh, there are 3 of us. I think the record is calling someone's name seven times, including the name of my father and her uncle, before getting it right.
    (It's actually one of the reasons she doesn't want me to get a name change because "it's already confusing enough".)
    • Like x 1
  5. Artemis

    Artemis i, an asexual moron

    My twin and I, being twins, are fairly used to our parents calling us by the other's name.

    My mom calling me "Patches" the dog's name was a new one.
    • Like x 4
  6. LadyNighteyes

    LadyNighteyes Wicked Witch of the Radiant Historia Fandom

    Half my relatives on my dad's side of the family have accidentally called me by my aunt's name at least once.
  7. rats

    rats 21 Bright Forge Shatters The Void

    whenever i start being snarky and pedantic my dad almost always calls me by my mom's name by accident #whoops
    • Like x 1
  8. Alaspooralice

    Alaspooralice An actual trash fire

    Once my grandma called me Nicolas... which was her dog's name.
    • Like x 3
  9. Bunny

    Bunny aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

    We got out current dogs as puppies about a year and a half/ two years after prior dog died.

    They're both at least five now and we all still slip up and call them Zeus pretty regular.

    We also had a ginger spaniel Finbar and we would babysit his also ginger brother Hamish "Hambone" and they were both regularly called Finbone and Hambar.
    • Like x 5
  10. Wingyl

    Wingyl Allegedly Magic

    my mother gets "bird", "cat" and "dog" mixed up, as well as the names of the dog and bird.
    She has also called me the bird's name, followed immedately by the dog's name, followed by my name, and once called her brother's girlfriend by the name of his dog.
    • Like x 7
  11. Everett

    Everett local rats so small, so tiny

    I accidentally referred to a cat (belonging to the host/ co-DM of our dnd sessions) by the name of the other co-DM's wife, who he'd explained may have to drop out of the game so i guess her name was on my mind.

    ("congratulations, your wife is a cat")
    • Like x 8
  12. PotteryWalrus

    PotteryWalrus halfway hideous and halfway sweet


    (me and mum were talking about the floofy pink spring blossom that's out atm and I forgot the word for candyfloss/cotton candy ^^;;;)
    • Like x 7
  13. Squid

    Squid *contents may vary*

    Just now I called a coffin a corpse box.
    • Like x 6
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  14. palindromordnilap

    palindromordnilap Well-Known Member

    It's occasionally called a "dead person crate" in Sicilian and Corsican, too.
    • Informative x 3
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  15. KingStarscream

    KingStarscream watch_dogs walking advertisement

    Moony trying to remember the phrase "tramp stamp" produced this gem: "slut mark".
    • Winner x 11
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  16. LadyNighteyes

    LadyNighteyes Wicked Witch of the Radiant Historia Fandom

    That's probably a soulmate AU fanfic concept.
    • Like x 7
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  17. Socket

    Socket fuzzy tabletop goblin

    • Winner x 5
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  18. Codeless

    Codeless Cheshire Cat

    I just asked people what warm it was on monday, because I forgot about temperature.
    • Like x 11
  19. Acey

    Acey hand extended, waiting for a shake

    I just completely forgot what chips were called while trying to ask my dad where the chips were. My brain substituted "cheese snacks," because the chips in question are nacho cheese Doritos and Cheetos. (Do Cheetos count as a chip?) My dad managed to pick up on what I meant instantly, but when my mom overheard she got very confused as to what I meant...fortunately my dad acted as a translator.

    EDIT: It's also worth noting that I forgot every brand name.
    Last edited: May 22, 2017
    • Like x 3
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  20. ChelG

    ChelG Well-Known Member

    People who've never met me call my sister by my name. Apparently I'm memorable.
    • Like x 3
    • Winner x 1
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