WTF Brain Autocorrect? - the majestic sea pancake and other substitutions

Discussion in 'General Chatter' started by Socket, Nov 25, 2016.

  1. BunjyWunjy

    BunjyWunjy Frabjous

    I was in a meeting with our CEO and I said "I have a... thingy. Brain thingy. Thing you say when you want something to happen. Suggestion."
    I'm still not over it.
     
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  2. Salted Earth

    Salted Earth DISOWNING DOESN'T STACK, ASSHOLE

    I forgot the word for a kettle, but I knew that my boyfriend was trying to make tea and the thing that makes the water go had finished making the water go. So I said, instead, "your tea-boiling device is ready." And I mean, I'm not wrong.
     
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  3. Acey

    Acey hand extended, waiting for a shake

    I just forgot the word for sex...and my meme-loving fuck of a brain decided to say "cummies" instead.

    Thankfully it was in a chat with a bunch of other filthy memelords, but wow.

    So yeah, I said "i will admit that the inevitable cummies are part of it" regarding something I ship and why I ship it.
     
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  4. Acey

    Acey hand extended, waiting for a shake

    You're really not!
     
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  5. NevermorePoe

    NevermorePoe Nevermore

    I forgot the word for freezer, so the sentence "Just put it in the cold oven." was born.
     
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  6. NevermorePoe

    NevermorePoe Nevermore

    "What kind of leaf soup would you like?"

    Tea. I was talking about tea.
     
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  7. Technicality

    Technicality All's fair in love and shitposting

    My RA just called a sprinkler a "fire nipple"
     
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  8. Salted Earth

    Salted Earth DISOWNING DOESN'T STACK, ASSHOLE

    I just described a spoon as "this thing... this food-scooping device".
     
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  9. Technicality

    Technicality All's fair in love and shitposting

    I called the sun the "bright glowy heat thing" the other day.
     
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  10. Socket

    Socket fuzzy tabletop goblin

    IMG_0016.jpg
     
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  11. KaidaShade

    KaidaShade Definitely not a horse

    My mum always calls those coin things you get to put in trolleys 'doofers'. She also routinely calls the horse by the dog's name and call the dog by the old dog's name.
     
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  12. Codeless

    Codeless Cheshire Cat

    I mean I call the coin thingies thingies soo....
     
  13. Wingyl

    Wingyl Allegedly Magic

    Mum once called me by first the dog's name, then the bird's name, then my name.
    that was funny, she just kind of...put her head her hands and defeatedly said what she'd been trying to say with the right name after accidentally calling me by the bird's name.
     
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  14. Socket

    Socket fuzzy tabletop goblin

    Today at work I told @inchwyrm I was just going to 'go fetch a up-top-steppy' so I could reach the boxes on the top shelf.

    I'd lost the word 'kick-stool'.
     
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  15. Codeless

    Codeless Cheshire Cat

    A german one: My mom forgot the word for chopping, so she wound up asking "Kannst du des mall in kleine mitz mitz mitz machen?" (Can you make that into little itz mitz mitz)
    mitzen (to mitz/chop)
    Mitze/mitz mitz mitze (The little peices you get when you chop things) turned into words from that.
     
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  16. theprettiestboy

    theprettiestboy wombatman

    My gf just referred to my neck as a shoulder tube and I don't think I'll ever get over it
     
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  17. budgie

    budgie not actually a bird

    I had to read a thing twice before I realized it said "expressive arts" and not "expensive arts".
     
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  18. Verily

    Verily surprised Xue Yang peddler

    I want you all to know that I was trying to tell my dad something funny about this thread, but I couldn't remember the word stingray to save my life. So I ended up having to legit use "sea pancake" for lack of a better way to get the basic idea across.

    Also I binged Young Justice in like the three days before it went off Netflix and I swear I could never remember Black Manta's name reliably. I'm impervious the nomenclature of the ray. It's just a problem I have apparently.
     
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  19. budgie

    budgie not actually a bird

    I read a news bulletin as "Australian authorities seize 3 tons of smuggled dogs". It took me 3 tries to realize that it said "smuggled drugs", and given Australia's animal laws, the only reason I read it repeatedly was because of the "3 tons" part.
     
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  20. budgie

    budgie not actually a bird

    I forgot Tolkein's name and came out with Ganondorf.
     
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