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newbie questions thread

Discussion in 'Howdy there!' started by jacktrash, Nov 10, 2016.

  1. jacktrash

    jacktrash absentee sperglord

    i'm gonna be less discouraging than other responders and say: go for it! just be courteous about it. by which i mean, make your own thread rather than camping someone else's, fight with ideas rather than people, put argumentation in the argumentation area, and just generally try not to be a jerk even if you're mad.

    people are a bit flinchy because there was recently an alcoholic narcissist who kinda sealioned half the staff into wasting hundreds of hours trying to explain to her why her various nastygrams and explosions and sexual harrassment episodes weren't ok. there are also a few folks here with a tendency to get splodey when stressed; it's not you, it's them, just put them on ignore if you don't want to engage. there's nothing wrong with just ignoring someone who upsets you.

    generally, if you're a civilized person who honestly wants to debate in good faith, you'll find a lot of takers, and some folks will really enjoy it.
    • Agree x 5
  2. Verily

    Verily invests her cash in stock in Cyber Disney

    I appreciate that you made the distinction between “allowed” and “okay”. That seems like a show of good faith to me. It also seems like a pretty good sign that you’re aware of nuance in social norms and care about how other people feel about them.

    I think people are nervous about blanketly saying yes to argumentation, just in case you turn out to be someone who uses “I warned you” and “you said it was okay” as shields against anyone who is uncomfortable with a particular line of argument. I don’t think you seem like someone who would do that. I hope you’re not, because I think it’s really good to get more varied opinions and takes on things. A good debate can be super useful.

    It’s not you that people are worried about. They don’t know you yet, so they really can’t be worried about you. It’s a bad recent experience, where we had things like a thread advertised as a serious discussion about racism, which failed pretty badly at discussion but succeeded at racism. That’s probably the fear here, that something like that will crop up, rationalized as an attempt to start a discussion and have realtalk.

    If you’re not planning to do that, I think you’ll do just fine.
    • Agree x 3
  3. Beldaran

    Beldaran 70% abuse and 30% ramen

    This community isn't really for that, so if that's your primary mode of engagement you might not get a lot of response. But you're totally free to discusses/argue things here with or without making friends. You just might get more engagement and more traction if you get involved in non-argument things and make friends too.
    Last edited: Jan 9, 2019
    • Agree x 2
    • Like x 1
  4. Codeless

    Codeless Cheshire Cat

    I mean any given half of us vehemently disagrees with the other on something, so if you can Find a unified opinion by all means.
    • Agree x 5
  5. jacktrash

    jacktrash absentee sperglord

    yeah, that too. hell, i don't even agree with seebs about everything, and we're married. just being forum buddies with somebody doesn't mean you've got to agree on all points.
    • Like x 4
    • Agree x 3
  6. seebs

    seebs Benevolent Dictator

    As a general thing: I think it's nearly always at least better to open with "I have gotten the impression people think X" or something, but be open to the possibility that some of the arguments are more complex than what you've seen.
    • Agree x 7
  7. crashXtheXsystem

    crashXtheXsystem New Member

    I have a really happy thing I want to shout about regarding my own mental health and my experience with my new doctor.

    I don't really feel like it needs a new thread. Can anyone point me toward a "this went RIGHT finally" thread?
  8. LadyNighteyes

    LadyNighteyes Wicked Witch of the Radiant Historia Fandom

    How about "What made you happy recently?"
    • Agree x 2
  9. Deresto

    Deresto According to all known laws of aviation, there is

    I was literally just about to suggest that, haha
  10. Lampad

    Lampad New Member

    Is there an accepted way to respond to a visible-to-search-engines thread with information I don't want to be visible to search engines?
  11. sirsparklepants

    sirsparklepants *cries in sports*

    Most people will create a subaccount so the information can't be traced back to their main account, afaik.
    • Agree x 1
  12. jacktrash

    jacktrash absentee sperglord

    i think if you link to a post in a non-searchable area the search engines can't follow that link.
    • Informative x 1
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